Today, I responded to an argument with my girlfriend by only using comebacks she'd used in previous arguments. I'm single now. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, my girlfriend started a conversation with "I don't want to break up" and ended the conversation with "I think I'd be better off alone." So I guess I'm now single. I think. FML
Today, I realized that I frequently argue with myself and respond back. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I had an argument. She admitted she didn't know why she was pissed at me, but still is, and now she won't talk to me. FML
Today, I had an argument with my wife. I told her to get back in the kitchen. How does she respond? By doing what I told her to do, and returning to hit me with a frying pan. FML
Today, I was shopping with my girlfriend, when a girl came out of nowhere, screaming at me for cheating on her, and saying she was dumping me. I've never seen her before, and she was almost grinning during her little act, but my girlfriend believed it, and I'm now single. FML
Today, I got into a minor argument with my fiancé. Deciding it wasn't worth fighting over, I shrugged and said, "Really, what are we even doing this for?" To which he replied, "Honestly, I don't know. I haven't loved you in years… Oh, you meant about the fight." And just like that, I'm now single. FML
Today, I got in an argument with an ex-girlfriend who kept tactlessly bragging to me about her new boyfriend. I told her to read what she'd sent me, then pretend her boyfriend was telling her that. Fifteen minutes later, her boyfriend calls me, yelling for making her feel sad. FML
Today, I wanted to text my girlfriend but lately we'd been at a loss for things to talk about. I thought, "Come on, she's your girlfriend, what's the worst that could happen." One hour and twenty two minutes later, I was single. FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend if she had ever broken up with anyone. She said, "Yes. You." and walked off. FML
Today, I was having an argument with my girlfriend in front of our friends. I didn't want her to spoil my good time, so I ignored her until she disappeared. She re-appeared thirty minutes later just to throw a punch that would make Muhammad Ali jealous. Our friends' reaction? They clapped. FML
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Top comments
jmsouthe7 3
******* double standard
leopardwilliam 22
How dare you use her words against her!
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Comments (112)
JHPugh 19
If she couldn't take what she was doing to you, i think she didn't deserve you, as corny as it sounds.
limegreenpoopie 31
Ouch...not a good idea. lol :p
gracehi 33
Plagiarism is NOT cool, man. YDI for stealing her material.
Creed_Aprooved 12
know that feeling bro
SheepShoop_fml 20
Both of you sound like children.
Sparx1_1 16
YDI. If you can't discuss the current issue and have to dig up old shit to fling around this is what usually happens.
RealSuperSand 21
Talk about not being able to handle a dose of your own medicine. **** her OP.
Tundulinski 7
Sorry bro but that should teach you something! Only women can use comebacks. Why? Because they said so!
allforfun 23
You're a dumbass. Admit defeat and retreat to your workshop
DynamicBoner 1
Total double standard, but at the same time, maybe you shouldn't be so passive-aggressive.