Miscellaneous: Today, I realized my girlfriend has more hair on her abdomen... - FML

By cogu - 03/02/2010 19:34 - France

Today, I realized my girlfriend has more hair on her abdomen than I have on mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 143

You deserved it 6 523

You tried

Innocence project

Road angst

By seriously though - 22/02/2014 05:48 - United States - Littleton

Today, I arrived at the airport only to find my suitcase was lost and my 3 weeks worth of clothes and supplies gone. All I had left was my wallet and carry ons. Upon leaving the airport I was mugged. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 818

You deserved it 3 558

By comfort_ - 27/03/2015 03:28 - United States - Dalton

Today, I managed to take an entire shower without realizing my socks were on. I washed my feet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 486

You deserved it 10 134

By what did I do? - 25/10/2013 11:54 - Australia - Sydney

Today, my ex boyfriend got into a physical fight with the guy I've been casually seeing for 9 months. Afterwards, they had a beer, a long chat, and decided this was my fault and I wasn't worth the drama. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 127

You deserved it 21 346

Who are you?

By forgotten - 02/10/2009 07:46 - United Kingdom

Today, being the nice grandchild that I am, I went to visit my grandmother. She didn't recognise who I was. I thought she was joking. She later called the police as, "Some weirdo had walked into her house." I'm that weirdo; she wasn't joking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 427

You deserved it 2 816

By 2.5-long-months - 28/07/2016 13:49 - Canada - Edmonton

Spicy

Today, my husband and I had our first prenatal appointment. My doctor told us we shouldn't have sex during the first trimester, "just to be safe". He has no evidence to back this, but now my husband is too scared to touch me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 204

You deserved it 1 610

By Ackno - 06/05/2017 16:00

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my husband when the pores on his forehead triggered my trypophobia. We had to stop before I had a panic attack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 979

You deserved it 1 703

Full of…

By weman - 04/09/2021 02:00

Today, I went to the doctor to see if she could check a lump in my vagina. She pushed the lump and asked, "Does this make you want to use the bathroom for a number 2?" I said yes. Turns out, it’s hard poop pushing against my intestines and the outside vagina wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 920

You deserved it 125

By Zephyric - 02/02/2010 06:57 - United States

Today, I made a friend on an online chat. We got along fairly well and even traded Facebook accounts. I found out that the two of us had a lot of very surprising things in common. We were the same age, we were from the same school, and we even had the same boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 370

You deserved it 3 465

By StungAlot - 19/06/2012 10:32 - United States

Today, I got stung by jellyfish. As I was writhing in pain on the beach, my dad comes up and asks me to be quiet and that I'm embarrassing him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 328

You deserved it 2 720

By TappedAnts - 08/04/2016 01:45 - United States - Seabrook

Today, I went to a family reunion with my brother and my mother. She spent quite a while giving a glowing introduction for my brother to one of her cousins. Then, just before walking off, she jerked a thumb in my direction and said, "Oh, yeah, and that's his sister." FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 038

You deserved it 1 316

Weirded out

By Anonymous - 29/09/2021 02:01

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend told me she is breaking up with me for my friend, because she likes people with diaper fetishes. I had no clue either of them liked that stuff. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 256

You deserved it 78

By Jason - 24/12/2017 19:00 - United States - Anchorage

Today, I found out that conducting CPR and saving a man's life means nothing if you break his ribs. He is suing me for $10,000. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 394

You deserved it 403

By Noname - 08/03/2009 04:28 - United States

Today, I opened my birthday present from my grandfather. It was a map of the USA color coded by regional percentage of available men. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 633

You deserved it 4 471

By jgdgjyfg - 25/07/2011 07:21 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad taped a picture of me to the fridge with "Do not feed the she-beast" written on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 115

You deserved it 8 879

By people will think I'm Shelley Duvall - 08/06/2017 20:00

Today, my son's yearbook came. I was pretty happy, because I also ordered a larger version of his photo because he's going to California for college and I wanted a special picture of him to keep. Unfortunately, my happiness disappeared when I saw that he was wearing a horse mask in the photo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 498

You deserved it 774

By latter - 24/09/2013 00:05 - United States - Middle River

Today, I had to explain to my brother why it's not OK to stick his knob in the toaster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 231

You deserved it 3 294

By ewwww - 27/04/2009 04:08 - United States

Today, my family was talking about how people's hair goes gray when they get old. My grandma mentioned that she was initially attracted to my grandpa because of his red hair and was sad when it turned gray. "It's ok," she continued, "his pubic hair is still red." FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 127

You deserved it 4 252

By MarcusJones713 - 08/04/2009 11:17 - United States

Today, I was at the gym with my friends when they invited me to do a few bench presses. Since I'd never done any before, I decided to start with no weights on the bar and work my way up from there. I wound up pinned beneath the bar, calling for my friend to come free me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 776

You deserved it 22 636

Psycho

By deadgirl - 15/05/2021 01:59

Today, I accidentally broke one of my mom’s favorite glasses while she was away. My dad saw and offered to tell her instead that he broke it, because, "let’s face it, if she knew it was you, she’d shove the glass shards down your fucking throat." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 367

You deserved it 96

By hellosir - 27/03/2011 17:55 - United States

Today, while at my dorm, I experienced a vomit-inducing migraine. In my hurry to get to the bathroom to puke, I couldn't find a pair of shoes. I urgently needed the toilet, so I braved the communal bathroom barefoot. As I opened the stall door, I stepped in someone else's fresh vomit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 307

You deserved it 4 189

Polygraphs are BS

By Anonymous - 26/09/2021 02:00 - United States

Today, I took a polygraph. The interviewer was mad at the way I was breathing and looking down once instead of straight ahead. The third test I started crying because he raised his voice, saying I was disrespecting his time. I was trying so hard but couldn't breathe with the equipment on, leaving my mind blank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 861

You deserved it 99

By hedgehog5 - 11/04/2009 19:14 - United States

Today, I found out my blood type is B. My parents are type A and type O. It's not genetically possible to be blood type B if your parents are A and O. This means I am either an adoptee, a mutant, or an illegitimate child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 186 567

You deserved it 9 799

By clarakipper - 25/09/2013 07:19 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I found out that the vacation my mom has been planning to "repair our relationship" was just an opportunity to change her Facebook profile picture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 497

You deserved it 2 713

By Anonymous - 27/12/2016 18:28 - Israel - Petah Tiqwa

Today, I was showing the Instagram of my crush to my cousin. He double-tapped the picture, thinking it would zoom it in. It was posted 5 months ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 571

You deserved it 1 501

By Anonymous - 01/10/2009 14:06 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. I was on their bed having sex with their daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 876

You deserved it 39 325

By Fattypatty - 09/07/2009 06:21 - United States

Today, I realized how fat I really am. While going to the bathroom I leaned to the side to wipe my butt and heard a crack. Not knowing what it was, I continued to wipe. After I finished, I got up to see that I'd cracked the toilet seat in half. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 272

You deserved it 58 189

By Anonymous - 06/12/2015 09:58 - United States - Asheville

Today, at work, my vindictive, cheating ex made me clean and inspect her new wedding ring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 217

You deserved it 2 193

By can't breathe - 22/11/2010 11:33 - Australia

Today, I was feeling nauseous and my cat was comforting me. I breathed in through my nose, and my cat's fur caused me to sneeze. I sneezed so hard, I threw up out my nose. Nothing will get rid of the smell from within my nasal cavity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 397

You deserved it 3 953

By duuuuude - 17/04/2009 03:08 - United States

Today, I was home alone while my mom went out to dinner. I decided to hop in the shower, and I noticed my mom left her douche in there. After, I texted her telling her what I found and that it was gross. Her response? "It's not gross. It came from my vagina, like you and your sister." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 902

You deserved it 23 237

Peek a boo

By Anonymous - 08/05/2014 02:31 - United States - Tampa

Spicy

Today, my husband and I put our children to bed a little earlier than usual, so we could have some sexy time. Immediately following my full-blown orgasm, I rolled over, only to see my wide-eyed son peeking over the top of the mattress. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 896

You deserved it 16 104

By singlesoon - 25/08/2009 04:26 - Canada

Today, I bailed my soon to be ex-husband out of jail after he'd been arrested for soliciting. Soliciting an undercover cop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 670

You deserved it 7 114

By Anonymous - 30/01/2012 06:36 - Australia

Today, I picked up my driver's licence and my keys off the floor at the same time, using only my toes. This was the highlight of my day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 785

You deserved it 6 190

By Anonymous - 03/06/2009 01:33 - Australia

Today, my bank card was skimmed (copied electronically) and my account was totally cleaned out. I had only just got paid and don't get paid again for 4 weeks. The bank says it will take 21 days minimum to resolve. They offered me a credit card with a huge interest rate to help me get by. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 272

You deserved it 2 684

Poor little kitty

By Anonymous - 13/01/2022 17:01

Today, I realized the kitten I adopted months ago either has serious attachment issues or the worst case of Stockholm syndrome I've ever seen. Only I can get near him, he can't stand us being over 5 feet apart, he meows until I let him into the bathroom with me, and I feel like a jerk for disliking it. I need space. FML

I agree, your life sucks 717

You deserved it 246

By dani0810 - 22/01/2013 11:39 - Canada - Sudbury

Today, I caught my 4 year old son yet again trying to drink out of the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 143

You deserved it 5 473

By dcait_1196 - 16/10/2010 13:14 - France

Today, I went to see Jackass 3 in 3D. While the previews were playing, some guy sitting next to me leaned over and began telling me what happens in every scene, completely ruining the movie for me. He tried to get my number afterwards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 120

You deserved it 4 412

By fritzile - 10/01/2016 23:53 - United States - Chandler

Today, I told a customer the bread he wanted has been discontinued. He replied with, "Are you serious? What is your name? I'm going up front to complain about you." I still don't understand how that's specifically my fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 073

You deserved it 1 324

By _sourdiesel7 - 10/11/2016 23:39 - United States - Vienna

Today, I was at work training for a new position. The girl who's been training me since I started decided to share about one of her tribe's proud, sacred traditions of eating raw, human flesh. I have another month shadowing her before I can work independently. I'm beyond disturbed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 370

You deserved it 820

By so bored -__- - 25/02/2012 04:18 - United States

Today, my parents dragged me along to a family soccer game. I got so bored watching a bunch of grown men practically buttfucking each other between kicking balls around the field, that I fell asleep. I woke up a few hours later to an empty field and had to walk five miles back home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 561

You deserved it 31 118

By mugs - 12/03/2009 19:49 - United States

Today, I asked my parents if the outfit I was wearing made me look fat. My mom looked at me and paused for a while; my dad said, "Honey, that outfit doesn't make you look fat. Your fat makes you look fat." FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 545

You deserved it 23 917

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Top comments

KindaMay_BInLove 0

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Thursday 4 February 2010 1:19

That's not really gross, silly people. Girls are genetically programmed to have more hair than boys. Would you rather she shave and have a prickly belly? I doubt it.

saranottelling 7

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Thursday 4 February 2010 2:04

You guys don't get this post at all. Clearly, the man is a hairless freak of nature and the small amount of hair on his girlfriend's abdomen makes him feel the acknowledgment is "FML worthy." I'm sorry freaky hairless man! You deserve a cookie!

Comments

DeepSouthEmoKid 0

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Thursday 4 February 2010 0:56

first

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Thursday 4 February 2010 0:56

you are dumb. sucks for OP tho

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Thursday 4 February 2010 0:59

nice deep south. stupid anti spam protection wouldn't let post, otherwise I would be first

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Thursday 4 February 2010 1:18

did you just congradulate someone for saying " first"? and so, society plunges deeper into the never ending abyss

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Thursday 4 February 2010 1:56

ewww!!! that's pretty fucked up

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Thursday 4 February 2010 2:20

get a life..

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Thursday 4 February 2010 2:21

I'm guessing she's brown? ;)

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Thursday 4 February 2010 5:11

WTF don't be a dumbass. what does being brown have anything to do with it

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Thursday 4 February 2010 13:54

Because darker girls have more hair bodily etc. Nair is her friend LOL

PottentialFML 0

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Thursday 4 February 2010 5:18

If she has got alot of treasure on her trail, imagine the treasure on her chest. :(

JoshTheMaggot 8

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Thursday 4 February 2010 6:01

hey if she's got more hair then you check if she has a penis if you havnt already. if something pokes you GTFO lmao

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Thursday 4 February 2010 6:17

It's a trap!!!

EastonxStealth 0

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Thursday 4 February 2010 6:36

Don't say that she is a very nice lady!!

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Thursday 4 February 2010 7:12

She probably has more hair on her nuts too!!

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Thursday 4 February 2010 9:52

so wait, OP, are y'all ants? abdomen :x ants... *crickets*

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Thursday 4 February 2010 14:25

well that's what you get for shaving your abdomen

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Thursday 4 February 2010 15:15

Ummm excuse me but isn't the abdomen on the bottom of your stomach near the pubic area? Just shave it..

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Thursday 4 February 2010 15:40

LOL you don't even know what abdomen is hahaha

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Thursday 4 February 2010 23:02

that's not a "girl"friend, you sir, are dating a man

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Friday 5 February 2010 5:58

that is gross!

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Wednesday 15 June 2011 19:29

maybe it's just in her genes! it's not like she was a guy cuz it depends on the ethnicity and the parents genes just cuz she has some hair on her stomach doesn't mean she's a weirdo it's genetic guys grow up!

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Thursday 4 February 2010 0:56

I think that's more of an f her life....sux though!

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Thursday 4 February 2010 0:57

You say that, yet if someone posted "Today, I realized that I have more hair on my abdomen than my boyfriend", how many YDI's would she get?

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Thursday 4 February 2010 1:03

if its in one day about 785

conversationist 0

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Thursday 4 February 2010 1:07

hahaha so true #5. but really having a hairy beer belly is not attractive so the only reason you could complain is because your girlfriend is a man.

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Thursday 4 February 2010 0:57

Dang that sucks.

eb0ny 15

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Wednesday 4 April 2012 13:57

I'm sure she's equally depressed about this. She probably has enough stress about it.

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Thursday 4 February 2010 0:59

A little carpet burn wouldn't hurt.

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Thursday 4 February 2010 3:55

lmao

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Thursday 4 February 2010 1:01

So true!!! I'd, personally, have to give that an "I agree, your life sucks" though. Oops: Supposed to be a reply to #5.

VanessaVander 2

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Thursday 4 February 2010 1:08

that sucks. fyl

perdix 29

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Thursday 4 February 2010 1:08

Does the hair go all the way down to her dick?

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Thursday 4 February 2010 1:32

HAHA

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Thursday 4 February 2010 2:39

LOL

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Thursday 4 February 2010 2:45



The_Norwegian 2

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Thursday 4 February 2010 3:50

Hahaha, I can't stop laughing.. :) 

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Thursday 4 February 2010 4:28

perdix ftw.

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Thursday 4 February 2010 4:34

hahaha:))

f_alltheirlives 3

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Thursday 4 February 2010 8:26

"Woah! stop right there dollface, Ive seen the crying game...."

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Thursday 4 February 2010 13:13

lmfao

fuzz97 23

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Thursday 4 February 2010 1:09

ew.

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Thursday 4 February 2010 1:13

that's soo gross

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Thursday 4 February 2010 4:25

not neccesarily. some guys just have less testoreone, ergo less body hair.

Tedet 0

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Thursday 4 February 2010 1:16

She's a man, babyeeeeah

Nearly

Today I ripped my lovely £50 coat on barbed wire, what I only worn a hand full of times, ended up having to spend £10 to get it repaired, have to wait till Friday to pick it up, it’s only Tuesday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

Today, a tech came to repair my cracked phone screen. He told me to remove my case and took it to his van in my driveway to fix it. Thirty minutes later, he rings my doorbell and hands me my phone back. He says he fixed the screen but tripped and dropped it walking back to my house, and completely shattered the back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57

You deserved it 3

Spicy

Spicy

Today, I spent all day waiting for an unlikely follow up text from the girl from Tinder I let peg me on the first date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 198

You deserved it 532

Today, I swear I'm off men for good after my latest dud date wanted me to pee on his chest to turn him on, and we were only 20 minutes into the first date. The entire male gender are disgusting pigs, no matter how nice they pretend to be. FML

I agree, your life sucks 601

You deserved it 745