Today, I read an incoming message on my wife's phone. "I miss your warm hands and mouth". The message came from a female co-worker of hers. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, my wife’s ex-boyfriend sent me a message with a screenshot of her trying to get in touch with him. FML
Today, I accidentally said, "Bye, love you," to a co-worker as I clocked out. Before I made it home, I had six missed calls and a long text from my co-worker professing her love to me. FML
Today, I got a text from a number I didn’t recognize that said, "I miss you." Assuming it was my mom and her new phone, I replied, "Miss you too, love you!" Turns out it was my new boss, checking to see if I’d be able to work an extra shift. Even though it was her text that was badly worded, I'm now known as the person who declared her love to the boss. FML
Today, I received a call from my wife. It would've been great if she hadn't left on a business trip three years ago. FML
Today, I got my phone fixed and the lady who was working on it somehow resent all the old text messages in my outbox. One was to my ex saying, "I love you." FML
Today, My girlfriend and I were watching tv when suddenly one of our phones start going off. We both have the same phone and they were next to each other. She picks up the phone and reads the text message, "I wish you were here! I'd fuck you silly" She gets pissed and runs out. It was her phone. FML
Today, I texted my girlfriend a long, heartfelt message this morning. Her response? "What do you need? Or is this even really you?" FML
Today, I got a text from a woman containing many naked pictures of her. Apparently she meant to send those to her boyfriend whose number is one digit from mine. The bad part? My girlfriend was using my phone when I received that message. FML
Today, whilst laying in bed with my girlfriend, she received a flirty message from her ex on her phone asking if she wanted to go to the cinema. She replied, knowing I could see the screen. The messages were signed with a love heart and about 15 kisses. She claims they are still just friends. FML
Today, my co-worker handed me the phone and said it was my boyfriend calling, so I answered "Hello, Love!" It was my boss. FML
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Top comments
birds_fml 7
Maybe her coworker texted it to the wrong number. Don't be so quick to jump to conclusions.
BurpusMe 0
Text back! "Come over to meet my husband. Dress sexy."
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Comments (253)
rachelbrown 0
i think this sounds incredibly delightful. can anybody say threesome?
oogyboogy 6
threesome
plexico 4
I know how you feel, man, I miss your wife's warm mouth and hands, too. Ever since she's been going lesbo, she hasn't had time to do that thing she does for me. You know, the one with the balls and the ass and so forth. I sure you miss it, too.
Intoxicunt 6
HAHAHA. Plexico, you're inhuman.
ZuraLasgeon 0
Three-way?
dramakat11 0
You people make me sick. It would seem his wife is cheating on him and that is ****** up. Any asshole who finds out his wife is cheating and instead of feeling hurt and betrayed is only excited by the possibility of a threesome obviously cares very little about his relationship. Pigs.
kriesmur 0
Please stop calling these people pigs. Pigs are sweet, delicious and chronically maligned (they're actually quite clean when they aren't kept in tiny cages with nowhere to shit but on themselves).
NaturallyUnlucky 0
^ You win. You just gave me flashbacks to Babe... always a good thing.
theycallmenell 0
Maybe OP's wife has the name of the coworker under the number of a guy so you wouldn't suspect anything but obviously that didn't work :p FYL if it is a guy
LeCielNousAide 7
it is really annoying that when an FML turns up with a guy cheating on a girl with another guy, everybody's all "dump the dude!!!!!" and when it's a girl cheating on a guy with another girl, it's "can anyone say 3 way?" it's really stupid. it doesn't matter what gender the person is that the significant other is cheating with, it's cheating nonetheless. apparently, girls aren't allowed to have as much fun sexually as guys are. i hate double standards. to the OP: whether the lover is a guy or a girl, FYL. your wife who you love is cheating on you and that hurts.
TheLetterZero 7
That explains many retards on this site.
I_am_stupid_also 6
Have all the fun you want. Just do it with other chicks and one guy. See? It's the guys that have less fun.
oogyboogy 6
#120!!!
Klabauterpete 0
Well, still better than that coming from a male co-worker.
tipsy337 0
Hot
NobodyUKnow 0
I think you should talk to your wife about this. You could really use this situation to your advantage if you wanted to. If not then divorce her if she is cheating. It could all just be one big misunderstanding if she got the names mixed up in her phone book, which I highly doubt. But I think a lot of males would enjoy seeing their wife in on g/g action.