Intimacy: Today, I made my new girlfriend orgasm for the first time. All...

If by "Fuck My Life" you mean "Fuck YES, my life!" then okay. If by "Fuck my Life" you mean "My life sucks" go to another emocorner, scene kid, because if you're sad about this, you probably don't deserve this. :P lol

omgbeckyyy 0

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Friday 6 March 2009 7:33

Yeah, I don't get where the bad part comes in, exactly?

Arj_fml 0

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Sunday 8 March 2009 15:26

good job dude!!!! your life isnt fucked!!

Nearly

Today, I realized my addiction to this site is so bad that anytime anything shitty happens, I immediately start writing an FML post about it in my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25

You deserved it 30

Today, I realized that I am unconditionally, irrevocably, and deeply in love with someone who doesn't love me anymore. I'd give my life for him and he won't even message me back. Life really sucks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 85

You deserved it 35

Spicy

Today, I left my student in charge of locking up because my wife was sending me risqué texts during a thunderstorm. When I got home, the windows broke and the living room got flooded. I then found out that my student didn't lock up properly and all my art got soaked. Everything got wet except me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 156

You deserved it 440

Today, I found out my favorite teacher didn't actually "retire" last year like she said to me. She was quietly fired after saying that, "Women who dress provocatively in public are asking to be r*ped" to a class full of teenage girls. I can't believe I used to idolize this woman. FML

I agree, your life sucks 573

You deserved it 128

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