Today, I punched my wife in the face, because she jumped out from behind the bedroom door in the dark. I'm afraid of the dark. I'm 21. FML
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Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend, who had just been awoken by her own fart. FML
Today, before I went to work, I wanted to kiss my wife goodbye while she was asleep, She punched me. FML
Today, I woke up after my pregnant fiancée punched me in the face. Apparently, I rolled over in my sleep and knocked her out of bed. She is still pissed about it. FML
Today, I had a dream in which I was being mugged. I started fighting the muggers off, while in reality, my fist smacked my wife in the face. Now she has a black eye, nobody believes my story, and they think I'm a wife beater. FML
Today, there was a knock at my door, and I was greeted by a punch to the face. The man was the extremely angry "fiancé" of the girl I've been married to for just over a year. FML
Today, I punched an older woman in the face. I only hit her after she grabbed my 4-year-old daughter and told her to, "stop dancing like a whore!" My daughter was so terrified, she peed her pants. FML
Today, in the middle of the night, my fiancé started yelling gibberish in his sleep. When I tried to wake him, he punched me square in the face. FML
Today, I shut the door to the bedroom so my wife and I could have a serious talk. Unfortunately, the cat stuck his paw under the door and started flailing around, causing me to bust up laughing at a bad moment. My wife was furious, threw a water bottle at me, and locked me out overnight. FML
Today, while my girlfriend and I were making out, she went to fix the pillow behind her head and punched me straight in the face. FML
Today, my girlfriend came over to my place unannounced. She slapped me in the face, said, "You son of a bitch." and stormed off. I have no idea what that was for. FML
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Top comments
genius_man16 1
WTF is wrong with YOU?! Is it young? Yes, but who the hell are you to pass judgments on people just because of their age? For all you know they have been dating since they were 11. Just because YOU aren't ready for marriage doesn't mean other people aren't. There is absolutely nothing wrong with being married at 21.
protooler31 0
why is everyone so surprised/shocked at someone being married at 21? Maybe he knocked her up, and did the right thing as a man and married her. I mean, getting married at 21 is certainly not nearly as controversial as marrying off your 15-16-17 year old daughters as was done in centuries past...
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Comments (272)
thesicmrcastle 0
don't feel bad i would've done the same the dark is scary
Neferria 0
Wow. That sucks for your wife to do something like that. She should have known that was going to happen. Don't listen to these other idiots who call you a pussy, because they would do the exact same thing.
sillylung 0
YDI for getting married at
EdwardHeart 0
Who has a wife at 21? You redneck!!!
Redneck325Ci 0
What does being a redneck have to do with anything? Great way to make yourself sound like a judgmental douche bag. You fail at life.
bexox 0
I didn't think much attention to this until I saw your name. And then I LOLed.
hopeforthefuture 0
I'm not a redneck... I live in the city... And I'm getting married next summer and i'm only 19.......
Redneck325Ci 0
Thank you? Lol
Fail_Pig 0
YDI for being albino, and gay, and homosexual, and for humping cats.
burnhamt23 0
Ydi for banging your wife
velcroshoes 0
Married at 21... your life sucks
itsgen 16
**** you for punching your wife!!! what the hells wrong with you i hate fake men like you who hit women be a man and take what ever she did to you wow she scared you
bexox 0
He didn't intentionally hit her. It was just a reflex.
EireGoBragh 1
You're an idiot, this was clearly a reflexive action. I imagine you're also one of those dumbass hypocrites who says women should be treated exactly equally, but then say anytime a man hits a woman, even in self defense, it's abuse. You're the type of person that makes people dislike feminists.
jumbi_fml 0
aw, this happened to me! except....i was 5....and on a haunted hay ride.....and i punched a guy that lunged at the cart..... but it was 'cause it was dark and i was scared :D
deathproof_fml 0
Go to hell you wife beating piece of shit.
123__456 0
You are such an idiot. He did NOT BEAT his wife, he punched her ACCIDENTALLY as a reflex. Plus, he's saying his life is ****** for it, he actually feels sorry for it. Geez. It's nobody's fault, it's just an accident.