Today, I met a hot guy at a club and we really hit it off. We went back to his place and we got down to business. After, I noticed he had an iPod Touch on his nightstand. I complimented him on it and he responded with, "Yeah, my girlfriend gave it to me as an anniversary present." FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, while at a club, I walked up to a cutie who had been eyeing me all night. I asked him "Is that a phone in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?". He simply replied "It's a phone" before walking away. FML
Today, my girlfriend bought herself a brand new iPad and iPod Touch, and returned my aging iPod and Kindle, which she constantly steals for her own use. She considers it my Valentine's Day present. FML
Today, I was sitting with a friend who moved back into town, and he told me about how he hooked up with a girl at a bar last night. I asked him if she was hot, he responded "Yeah, I have a picture of her on my phone." It was a picture of my girlfriend. FML
Today, I was at a club with a friend. A cute guy kept smiling and looking over at me. He left his seat and went to the bar and brought back two drinks. He waved me over and then said, "Can you tell your hot friend that I bought her a drink?" FML
Today, it is my boyfriend's and my one year anniversary. I bought him a Playstation 2. As soon as I gave it to him, he went straight to set it up without giving me anything. I said "What about me?" He walked over to me, gave me a kiss and said "I love it when you buy me things for no reason." FML
Today, I was alone with a work acquaintance at lunch. A noise came from his pocket; he whipped out his iPod Touch and said "Sorry, I have to take this," before walking away with the iPod to his ear. Not only did he not want to talk to me, he thought I was stupid enough to confuse an iPod with a phone. FML
Today, I met a hot guy at the bar and we hit it off instantly. After a few drinks, he called a cab for us. When it arrived, I seducingly asked, "My place or yours?" He responds, "Both. I'll go to mine and you go to yours" and walked away. The cab driver laughed the whole way home. FML
Today, I spent a nice night with the guy I’ve been madly crushing on for the past year. When he went to the bathroom and left his phone unlocked, I looked at his photo album and saw photos of my house, my room, me sleeping, and my naked body. FML
Today, I was hanging out with a few of my friends, including an old ex-girlfriend and her current boyfriend of 5 years. When my ex, whose virginity I had taken years earlier, mentioned, "I had the iPhone first," without thinking, I immediately responded, "Well, I had YOU first." FML
Today, when I got home from work I was pretty "in the mood" so I put on some cute undies and a tank top and went to get my boyfriends attention, he was so into his new computer game all I got was a half smile and a pat on the head. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thank you, your FML was submitted, and will appear the moderation soon!
Top comments
qwertyuiop8989 0
It's just sex....it's his fault...not yours
Signposthead 0
Why would you complement him on his ipod touch, if it was like an iPhone signed by a famous person a could see it, but come on
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (202)
KumoFF7 3
YDI for being a filthy harlot
Vitamin_C 0
Serves you right for ******* random people
summer99 0
all these FMLs are the same my god don't you people learn to make sure the person you're hooking up with isn't already taken!
pat2rome 0
I love how the name is "accidentalslut." Because you're definitely only a **** because the guy has a girlfriend. Not because you met him at a club and then had sex with him a few hours later.
danceoo 0
i don't think it's your fault that it happened, but when you have a lifetsyle like that, then you have to expect that that might happen. If you have sex with a guy you don't know, who knows what could happen?
capricaz 0
How is this an fml? F his girlfriend's life. What were you expecting, a relationship? ****.
cramazing 0
ACCIDENTAL ****??? how is this accidental U hooked up with somebody u didnt even know
luvluv_fml 0
how did you meet him? what were you talking about, for gettin hit it off?, j/w
blahdsflksfd 0
Any sex before marriage is wrong. No casual sex.
OMFGG 0
wtf
glassdoorfail 0
no way, it perfectly legit 2 try b4 u buy
plexico 3
Don't worry, in a few weeks the girlfriend will compliment him on the running, syphilitic sores on his dick and he'll respond with, "Yeah, some dumb **** from the club gave it to me as a First Date present."