Long John

By piratequeen - 07/08/2009 17:39 - United States

Spicy
Today, I was having sex with my husband. As I was undressing, he said, "Arr, I spy me some booty!" I let it go, I'm used to his embarassing pirate talk. But as he orgasmed, he screamed, "I'VE FOUND THE BURIED TREASURE!" My neighbors heard in the apartment next door and called to let me know. FML
I agree, your life sucks 56 218
You deserved it 7 119

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Hermyoni 0

That is funny. Not only because your husband has a pirate fetish but because your neighbors overheard it.

unkinged44 0

also when u have an ****** yell THAR SHE BLOWS

Comments

Hermyoni 0

That is funny. Not only because your husband has a pirate fetish but because your neighbors overheard it.

Agreed. Sounds like your husband is ******* hilarious! Why the hell are you so uptight about that? This is more like F your husbands life.

When you dump him, yell WALK THEE PLANK, YARRRRR

You're husbands ******* awesome. YDI for having no sense of humour.

unkinged44 0

also when u have an ****** yell THAR SHE BLOWS

Knight05 0

If i was your husband I would hit you as hard and as fast as I could over and over till I either got tired, or the police had me on the ground in handcuffs. Because that's the only way to make a woman TRULY appreciate you is to beat it into them till they get it.

persiancutie 0

lmao thats hilarious try talking pirate with him maybe he'll stop lol

ConnorMichelle 0

get that your a psycho douche bag?

justdancebbyx3 7

ROFLMAO. I just got the image in my mind xDD

hells to the yes for the weeds referance. avast ye skurvy wench

**** you, you fatass wannabe pirates fucktoy!!!!!!

americayay 0

Lol #1. Thank you for explaining that. That was creepy OP. Especially since it happens often, apparently.

Maybe their neighbors will make them walk the plank.

No that's his line for when he gets head

You're obviously a power hungry asshole who doesn't a thing about a healthy relationship. I've never even had a girlfried(not because I can't get one, but because I never knew anyone whom I wanted to be with) and you comments just oozes of what-the-fuckery. If you beat a women, she A)leaves you B)reports you to the police C)hate you with all their heart D)kills you E(most like) both A and B

Bumblebeeblooz 0

#44 would it not be more appropiate to say thar she blows when she gives you a *******?

thatssohilarious 0

"also when u have an ****** yell THAR SHE BLOWS" Hahahahaha!!! That's really funny.

LMFAO!!!!! Thar she blows!!!! Oh my god ******* congrats man! that was the best thing ever

op, you should be happy you guys have some code words to talk dirty in. would you rather want your neighbors to hear him say Im Gina explode

Actually, your comment screams of what-the-fuckery... wrong FML???

36th hahahaha owned!!! now you know what it looks like I pitty the fool who is as dumb as you!

Learn how to spell "pity" if you're going to call someone dumb.

XxHannahxX 0

Wtf is a touche, if you meant douche then you truly are a dumbass.

Morty_fml 0

What sort of an idiot doesn't know what touche means?

#149, you just created a new kind of failure! it's so epic, that saying epic fail seems piss weak!

ur the dumbass touché as in like back at ya.... read a book

Touché is more like a short term for "I stand corrected" Or a basic meaning such as "ok you got me". Say "back at you" is not a reference to touché. It's like mimicking the end result of the insulted back to the person who said it. Two totally different things. Just though I would clarify that. I don't feel like looking up the French definition because I speak English dammit!

Not only were you not first, nobody cares. Does this look like Tumblr?

Let's hope he didn't like it *too* much and finished before her.

blondeirishgurl 0

i think you should talk to him about it, but it obv doesnt bother you too much. so

NOT!!!! You got owned my friend. That was to #2 in case you can't tell...

bbobe900000 0
vespero 0

agreed. ur husband has issues

Her husband is awesome he needs an award!