Love: Today, I lost my virginity in a porta-potty. FML

By NotALuckyGuy - 07/04/2015 16:19 - United States - Columbus

Today, I lost my virginity in a porta-potty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 032

You deserved it 47 386

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 04/02/2013 17:17 - United States - Durham

Today, my girlfriend lost her virginity. I still have mine, though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 402

You deserved it 3 889

By Anonymous - 17/06/2013 05:54 - United States

Today, I lost my virginity. Not only did my parents somehow find out, they posted about it on Facebook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 334

You deserved it 11 261

By Anonymous - 12/11/2011 23:04 - United States

Today, the handle in the port-a-potty broke off, with me inside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 092

You deserved it 2 844

Help!

By stinkyhair - 19/12/2011 17:48 - United States

Today, thanks to some asshole with a padlock, I got trapped in porta potty for over an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 834

You deserved it 2 837

By angie24w - 07/08/2018 23:30

Today, I had no choice but to use a porta potty. I was happy to get a clean one. I wasn't happy when a young child tried opening the door and used enough force to break the lock, showing me sitting on the toilet to the world. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 819

You deserved it 192

By Anonymous - 02/05/2015 02:22 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 003

You deserved it 4 133

Sprinkler system

By missed - 25/06/2021 14:01 - United States

Today, I was using a mall bathroom. Thinking the toilet seat had to be unsanitary, I decided to squat. I was a little farther out than I thought, and ended up peeing all over the bathroom floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 257

You deserved it 1 378

Can't hold it in anymore

By Anonymous - 28/05/2022 04:00 - United States - Colorado Springs

Today, both toilets in my house were occupied, so I had to shit outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 752

You deserved it 181

By lookwhereyasittin - 24/01/2016 17:47 - Netherlands - Den Haag

Today, it was the first day in my life that I fell into a toilet because someone left the toilet seat up. I'm a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 925

You deserved it 6 609

By Anonymous - 07/12/2018 20:00 - United States - Huntsville

Today, I finally lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams, unfortunately she called me by my ex-bestfriend's name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 832

You deserved it 374

WCARlover 34

Wednesday 8 April 2015 0:32

I love how you say "fml" like you had no choice in the matter

Steffi3 40

Wednesday 8 April 2015 0:30

Classy.

Comments

theflyingbrant 9

Wednesday 8 April 2015 5:27

I lost mine in a tree.

FMLworthy5000 21

Wednesday 8 April 2015 5:27

I think the amazing part is that no one got splashed by used potty water or that it didn't tip over seeing as it's already hard enough to fit one person in there...

jessgambill01 5

Wednesday 8 April 2015 5:28

at least you got ******

RackCity1325 5

Wednesday 8 April 2015 5:31

It's pronounced Jo Dir Tey

Sxylilhalfpint 20

Wednesday 8 April 2015 5:35

You must have wanted it pretty badly to put up with that smell just so you could get laid. Lol. YDI

BillDanYa3 3

Wednesday 8 April 2015 5:36

whoer

3ph600v 15

Wednesday 8 April 2015 5:45

Doesn't matter. Had sex

jmigs17 19

Wednesday 8 April 2015 5:56

You should probably start looking for it ASAP. Not the best place to miss place something

repzero 7

Wednesday 8 April 2015 6:04

i lost mine in a cold lake

bazookajoey 27

Wednesday 8 April 2015 6:07

That's pretty trashy

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I went to Starbucks to use the bathroom. After I knocked on the door and turned the handle, a little old lady ripped the door open and yelled, "I WAS TAKING A DUMP. YOU WANNA COME IN AND WIPE MY SHIT? DO YOU?!" and then continued to ask me the same question for five minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 878

You deserved it 4 533

Today, I went to a fancy restaurant. I was coming right from work and brought a change of clothes with me. I parked in an empty corner of the parking lot to change. As I was pulling my pants up, I noticed that I was facing an apartment complex where an old guy was watching me from his balcony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 273

You deserved it 19 598

The Top

Today, the person I was driving behind put their car in reverse and backed straight into me. I was then yelled at and told, "I had my reversing lights on! Why didn't you move?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 297

You deserved it 1 759

Today, I brought my girlfriend back to my place, but my abusive, homeless dad, who I haven’t spoken to in a year, had broken in to have sex with some woman in my front room, before both passing out on heroin. My girlfriend saw my dad's penis and drug stuff, and left me to clean him up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 764

You deserved it 246

Today, I walked in on my soon-to-be-ex-husband with his coworker (who we'd always argued about) bent over in front of him. Both of them buck ass naked. He was supposed to be watching our two year-old daughter, who was in another room eating applesauce by herself. She was drenched in applesauce from head to toe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 526

You deserved it 157

Today, I met a girl at the bar. Things were going really well and we ended up going back to her place. Problem? Her husband who normally works the graveyard shift was home sick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 871

You deserved it 11 717

Today, my now ex-girlfriend posted on Facebook that I called her a "fucking bitch". Our mutual friends were all outraged, and demanded that I treat her with respect. What she failed to mention was that I said it after finding out that she's been sleeping with my "best friend" for the past year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 106

You deserved it 3 648

Today, while registering at the grocery store, a customer came into my lane with a 100 piece boiled shrimp platter. Feeling hungry, I muttered, "Nom nom" under my breath. The old man called my supervisor. Apparently I called him a moron. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 182

You deserved it 30 247

Same thing different taste

Help!

Sprinkler system

Can't hold it in anymore

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