By anonamous - 12/03/2012 21:45 - United States

Today, I hugged my dog and kissed her on the side of the face. She responded by mauling me across my own face. FML
I agree, your life sucks 22 159
You deserved it 9 122

Same thing different taste


ThisIsMyReign 4

Nothing says "I love you" like getting mauled in the face by your own dog.

Maybe she was goin for something a little kinky...

#22 If she's trying to be kinky with a dog, then there's something wrong with that picture.

I was thinking more from the dogs point of view, but ok sure make it awkward.

Maybe your breath stank. He was just trying to be helpful in his own way

Maybe your breath stank. He was just trying to be helpful in his own way

YdoIhaveAchode 4

Thank you I was wondering what was causing that itch

Meraklez1013 9

I knew I wasn't the only one!! :D

IAdminIFlow 0

fml admins r obv on their periods. deleting all humorous comments. they obv arent funny people

Whenever my dog licks MY face I maul him. >.> i thought it was the norm

As opposed to mauling you across someone else's face?

Guess you could call it a love tap? Just kidding

I doubt she mauled you there is a difference between being mauled and bitten I've been both a bite hurts sur but If she mauled your arm( in my case ) the body part will be completly ripped open and also it's harder to heal fix it's posible that ur nerves can be ripped and ya... so my point is that she most likely didn't maul your face would be completly ripped up and you would need to get to the hispital soon

IAdminIFlow 0

your dog obviously knows you are a carrier.

For some reason my mind skipped over the word dog and I was thinking girlfriend.

that pretty much is why dogs are so damn adorable :D

And "diamonds are a girl's best friend", but since we can't tell OP's gender, we can't tell which one is relevant.

it's a saying. it doesn't mean a dog is a male human's best friend, but the best friend of the human race itself. I suggest you get some of this stuff that people call common sense.

^ I suggest you get the hell off the Internet before you infect it with your seriousness.

TexasJosh 0

80 - Who pissed in your wheaties?

sorry twas I who took a dump in his lucky charms

common sense is not putting your face in a dog's face.

Meh, that's usually a standard response with me. Gets the point across faster and better than talking.

Try hugging a cat and see how that goes...

lizard399 0

"hey can I borrow your stapler?" Response: *mauls face*

50- I'm hugging my cat right now :) He loves meeeee

VasilisaUzhasnaj 29

Yeaaah, my cat actually pleads to be picked up. I'm sure if you tried hugging some outdoor cat (assuming you can catch them first) it wouldn't end well.

TexasJosh 0

Cats are affectionate. Outside cats not as much usually. Mine love to be picked up and held.

Looks like we have ourselves here some o' them hipster cat-huggers fresh out of college

Actually my cat mauls me when I DON'T hug her :')

And plus, I thought dogs didn't like it when you bring your face near their face?

Tswift0806 3

Actually, try hugging a bear cub when the mom is right there and see how THAT goes.

That was just her way of showing "affection," just make sure that when you're making love to your dog, you wearing protection.

FMLsOhilarious 6

Sounds like your dog is showing you some tough love.

Bitch: A female dog, wolf, fox, or otter. Why of course, it is a female dog (therefore, a bitch), what's your point?

115 - I believe that was the intended pun that 10 was making...

Tis an idiot commenting. Not very suprising.

Tis? wow new word I missed out on in school! what school you go to?

Shootermtd25 7

I'm pretty sure Tis is like an old phrase

It's an old phrase. Think back to Shakespeare.

AcidRaen 4

Its like 'twas. Which stands for it was. 'tis stands for it is. Like a backward contraction i guess? Idk what its called if it has a name.

kittenvks 11

I read this comment in a cruella deVille type voice

emmanizzer 6

I read it in a Morrigan voice....

Uhh 113, you're an idiot. It is a word, it's just not used often these days.

desireev 17

'Tis' stands for 'it is'. 'Twas' stands for 'it was'. Simple as that.