Today, I had my first free night in months. I spent it doing homework and watching TV. I had set my Facebook status to say I was spending time with the boys from The Big Bang Theory, then fell asleep. I woke up later to an angry text from my boyfriend thinking I was cheating on him. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I hung out with a friend who has been too busy to hang out with me in a few months. I decided to make the day super special with fun plans and spent a lot of money doing so. When I got home, her Facebook status said, "Pointless day, gone to bed." FML
Today, I had the day off from work. I did all the chores hoping to free up time to spend with my husband tonight. When he came home, he looked around and decided that since there was no need for him to stick around and help clean, he'd head to the bar to watch the game with the guys. FML
Today, my wife finally let our kids stay the night at my mom's house, meaning we had our first night totally alone together in 6 years. She spent all night texting my mom for updates on the kids or on the phone to her sister, so I watched a film by myself then went to bed bored at 8:15 p.m. FML
Today, I saw that my ex-boyfriend was online and had no plans. I felt extreme happiness knowing he had no life. Then I realized that I was online and had no plans. FML
Today, I spent one night with my phone turned off so I could finally relax. When I turned it back on I had 17 missed calls from siblings wanting to moan about their spouses, 5 calls from mom, 6 from dad, 2 from work, and 2 from my ex. I think I’ve earned some time alone, don’t you? FML
Today, while cuddling with my boyfriend, he got up and said he needed to go home because he was tired and just wanted to relax and watch TV. That's what we were doing. FML
Today, I was checking my friends' posts on Facebook and all of them were complaining what a boring night they had. They were all just at my house. FML
Today, my boyfriend took me on a romantic weekend away at a hotel. What is he doing now? On his computer looking up stuff on Craigslist while I am watching t.v. alone. FML
Today, my long-distance boyfriend wanted to spend time online with me. He kept quiet on Skype and went on a hundred different stupid websites, laughing by himself. Afterwards, he told me he really enjoyed our time together. FML
Today, I was so lonely, I tried to get into bed noiselessly while pretending I had a boyfriend asleep in it. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
hiyourcute 0
Well, Sheldon could drive any woman to cheat...
DocBastard 40
Imagine what his reaction would have been if you'd said you'd be spending the night with Two and a Half Men.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (106)
swagguy_fml 0
Y.O.L.O!
strawberryspacejam 11
if u said their names its not unreasonable for him to think that
RendarSelin 5
Someone sure is an insecure little boy...FYL
kitsune3 20
Your boyfriend is both absurdly jealous and a moron.
Izabel12 7
Haha, I love that show (:
katy215 0
He's gotta be an idiot to not know what The big Bang Theory is .
EpicFail1520 16
Over protective BF.
doglover100 29
How does he not know it's a tv show? He's not that smart. No one would post about it online.
Infiltrator4444 6
First free night in months and you don't spend it with your boyfriend? YDI. If I were your boyfriend I'd be crushed. You're not very affectionate at all.
Minou_fml 22
I think the reason I'm going to die alone is that I don't see a problem with that. I don't feel like being in a relationship automatically makes you obligated to spend your free time with them, no matter how infrequent it is. In fact, if it's infrequent, I think it's even more important for one's sanity to spend a good portion of it alone. They might work together, take the same classes, etc. Or her first "free night" could also mean her first night without plans of any sort, including ones with her boyfriend. Clingy boyfriends are the bane of my personal existence.
sulitak 27
or maybe free included "not a date night" geez. time apart is essential. I'm looking forward to my husband going on a boys weekend in the wilderness...
ShananaginsLOL 13
Bazinga!!!!