Today, I had a friend "dump" me over Facebook. She apparently thought we were dating. I'm a gay man who's lived with his partner for 5 years. She says I have commitment issues. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was shopping with my girlfriend, when I saw my best friend. I jokingly did a double-take and said I didn't recognize him with his clothes on. We laughed, talked a bit, then went our separate ways. My girlfriend later dumped me, claiming I'm blatantly gay and cheating on her. FML
Today, I was dumped by my girlfriend due to our long distance relationship. She then agreed to date my best friend who lives in the same town as me. FML
Today, my girlfriend slapped me and dumped me because she thought I was gay, simply because I had to miss a date because one of my guy friends was in a car accident, and I went to see him at the hospital. FML
Today, after dating this girl for 3 months, I finally introduced her to my friends. She looked panicked during the date, and after it she broke up with me. When I asked why, she told me she could try to deal with a black friend, but not with a gay one. I've been dating a moron all this time. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, saying I was immature for making gay jokes all the time. A few hours later, I got six texts and three calls from guys I didn't know. It turns out, she put my name and number on Craigslist as a gay man seeking a relationship. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that she doesn't want a physical relationship, but an emotional one instead. I said that I was fine with that, as long as we talked things through in the future. She dumped me there and then, because "no straight guy would agree to that." FML
Today, my girlfriend who I love very deeply dumped me two times, over the phone. The first time was to dump me. She then called me back a couple hours later explicitly to dump our friendship. I was just friend dumped. FML
Today, a "friend" of mine told everyone that I had a crush on a girl I used to be really good friends with 2 years ago. I never liked her that way, and had said that only to hide the fact that I'm gay and don't feel safe with boys. Her current boyfriend is seriously annoyed with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because "we don't communicate enough". She got her friend to tell me this for her. FML
Today, the woman I thought I had friend-zoned dumped me because she has "met someone new." I really like her as a friend but felt zero attraction, so after one date I went out of my way not to give off the wrong signals when talking or meeting. It turns out she thought I was on my way out of the "relationship" anyway. FML
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Top comments
SelenaMilkshake 17
Well she sounds lovely.
EpicSquishii 21
Perfect opportunity to embarrass the hell out of her. Or you can just troll her and post a picture of you kissing your boyfriend with the caption "You turned me gay."
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Comments (102)
avaeba 14
She sounds like a real Rhodes Scholar
etishuman22 32
It sounds to me like she's A) pretty delusional B) a terrible, awful listener (I highly doubt that you wouldn't share stories about your partner if you two had been together for five years!!) C) very full of herself. You're better off without a friend like that, OP. Congratulations to you and your partner! Five years is a long time. I've only been with my SO for two years, and that feels like forever! :)
Bubbelz 25
Perhaps you should list him as your partner on Facebook.
Kerdooski 8
Was it Taylor Swift?
x0ellison0x 21
Wait... What??
CanadianCutie22 16
lol !!
onorexveritas 23
her gaydar obviously doesn't work
nix1993 41
I think she just has issues.
nerdchic 5
Women are crazy... Ignore her lol
pnutbutternjelly 15
Well I hope you told her that and everyone got to see what an idiot she was.