Today, I had a friend "dump" me over Facebook. She apparently thought we were dating. I'm a gay man who's lived with his partner for 5 years. She says I have commitment issues. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was shopping with my girlfriend, when I saw my best friend. I jokingly did a double-take and said I didn't recognize him with his clothes on. We laughed, talked a bit, then went our separate ways. My girlfriend later dumped me, claiming I'm blatantly gay and cheating on her. FML
Today, I was dumped by my girlfriend due to our long distance relationship. She then agreed to date my best friend who lives in the same town as me. FML
Today, my girlfriend slapped me and dumped me because she thought I was gay, simply because I had to miss a date because one of my guy friends was in a car accident, and I went to see him at the hospital. FML
Today, after dating this girl for 3 months, I finally introduced her to my friends. She looked panicked during the date, and after it she broke up with me. When I asked why, she told me she could try to deal with a black friend, but not with a gay one. I've been dating a moron all this time. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, saying I was immature for making gay jokes all the time. A few hours later, I got six texts and three calls from guys I didn't know. It turns out, she put my name and number on Craigslist as a gay man seeking a relationship. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that she doesn't want a physical relationship, but an emotional one instead. I said that I was fine with that, as long as we talked things through in the future. She dumped me there and then, because "no straight guy would agree to that." FML
Today, my girlfriend who I love very deeply dumped me two times, over the phone. The first time was to dump me. She then called me back a couple hours later explicitly to dump our friendship. I was just friend dumped. FML
Today, a "friend" of mine told everyone that I had a crush on a girl I used to be really good friends with 2 years ago. I never liked her that way, and had said that only to hide the fact that I'm gay and don't feel safe with boys. Her current boyfriend is seriously annoyed with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because "we don't communicate enough". She got her friend to tell me this for her. FML
Today, the woman I thought I had friend-zoned dumped me because she has "met someone new." I really like her as a friend but felt zero attraction, so after one date I went out of my way not to give off the wrong signals when talking or meeting. It turns out she thought I was on my way out of the "relationship" anyway. FML
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Top comments
SelenaMilkshake 17
Well she sounds lovely.
EpicSquishii 21
Perfect opportunity to embarrass the hell out of her. Or you can just troll her and post a picture of you kissing your boyfriend with the caption "You turned me gay."
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Comments (102)
erichsalvesen 13
Strangely enough, I actually have a similar thing happening with me. I **** blocked an asshole so now everyone thinks I like this chick and everyone is jumping through hurdles to get us together. I am just as gay, though single, as the OP. so I feel his pain/confusion. Good luck :)
eliotar 6
While that does suck, it's her who looks bad, and you can just have a good laugh with your boyfriend/"partner"
Obryn 9
Honestly, that's pretty damn funny. Shows that some people just see what they want to see, facts be damned!
fleur_de_fevrier_fml 23
Ok so she assumed you were dating although she didn't know you enough to know that you are 1/ gay and 2/ in a long term relationship? What did she base "your" relationship with her on? A peck on the cheek when you said hello?
VeganVampyre 27
Yup, and then he said he liked her new hairstyle, which obviously meant he's in love with her, and that was all it took. Happily ever after. Until he went and cheated on her with his boyfriend, the bastard.
chosha_fml 27
She seems to have some delusion issues.
Kauphy 12
You seem to have missed that someone already made this comment.
chosha_fml 27
So I did. Oh dear, are you going to make me walk the plank?
RedPillSucks 33
bow chicka wow wow???
Rahii_nami 10
lol.......
cupcakedoom 3
My twin had similar experience with a room mate..only she got a bf and he lost his marbles.
theunbeatableram 3
I'm happy and surprised nobody's scolded him for being gay yet.
Kauphy 12
Why on earth would he be scolded for that?
RedPillSucks 33
People don't need reasons to do stupid stuff.
perdix 31
I'd agree with her. Pretending you are gay to avoid the inevitable truth that you two belong together does indicate that you have a problem.
laurenasabutton 26
Doesn't it say on most people's Facebook accounts 'in a relationship with...'? How could she not have seen you were alrwady with someone?
nightbirdblue 27
Some people don't mess with their profile (timeline now) options and information much. Or perhaps the girl played it off as some joke at first, but was really serious. I don't know how many times my friends have been 'married' or other relationship statuses when they are not.