Today, I got knocked over at the park by a rampant dog. My fiancé stood by laughing his ass off as I repeatedly tried to stand up, only to be knocked back down again. I'm seven months pregnant. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I woke up after my pregnant fiancée punched me in the face. Apparently, I rolled over in my sleep and knocked her out of bed. She is still pissed about it. FML
Today, as I was on the floor playing with the dog, my husband walked past, tripped over something, and fell on me, smashing his bony elbow right into my crotch. FML
Today, I told my husband I was pregnant, then he fainted. FML
Today, I came home on crutches. My dog was immediately afraid of them, and came running towards me, growling and barking. She ran right into me, knocking me over. FML
Today, I was walking around the park with my wife. Out of nowhere, a little girl on a bicycle slammed in to me, knocking me to the ground. As I rolled over, sure that my ankle was broken, her father ran over to me. He screamed, "Watch where you're going, douchebag!" FML
Today, my fiancé and I decided to have a romantic rendezvous on the trampoline in our backyard. Or at least it was romantic, until I accidentally rolled off and all but crushed our dog. FML
Today, I saw a pregnant woman fall off her moped. As I helped her back up, I asked if her baby was okay. I was then blindsided by her brick of a purse while she screeched, "I'm not pregnant!" FML
Today, I was running with my sister's dog. It had the brilliant idea of shooting between my legs and I immediately faceplanted on the cement. I now have a swollen nose and cuts all over my body. I'm a grown man who does martial arts and I got beat up by a dog the size of a baby. FML
Today, my boyfriend picked me up bridal-style to carry me to our bed. As he carried me through the bedroom door, the dog ran between his legs and sent us both crashing to the ground. FML
Today, I was walking in the park with my girlfriend, when out of nowhere, I was savaged and brutally humped into submission by a massive Great Dane. Not only did my girlfriend watch it all, but the dog's owner took the time to snap a few pictures with his phone. Neither bothered to help me. FML
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Top comments
kaitieloo 22
Ultimate douchebag.
transcedental 18
This is the first time I actually say 'Fuuuck' while reading an FML, and I've been around here for years. This is too brutal for a pregnant lady, he should've taken care of you. Sorry, OP, I hope you're alright.
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Comments (218)
allplayedout 20
Is he not aware that getting pummeled like that could send you into early labor? Your fiancé sounds about as mature as Seth rogan in that movie...any movie.
Stuffaluffagus 25
Sounds like you picked a real winner
doglover100 28
I hope the baby is ok.
beranek22 7
He sounds just like my Dad. He did the kind of shit to my Mom all the time. He once pulled a chair out from Under her while she was pregnant with me. They ended up getting a divorce.
worldclassrager 39
Let's see here: Owner of the dog should stop that... Husband should be trying to protect/help you... While you just hope for the best for the little one inside you...
Jadzia4831 2
Hope you and the baby are okay! And he would sooo regret just standing there if he was my fiance.
kbuglgbco 4
At first when I read it I laughed but when it said you're 7 months pregnant that's not funny
SeahawksnationxD 7
Wow really guys? Why do you all immediately feel so bad for the person?
MissDQ 12
Because that's a pretty darn shit situation to be in ? Being knocked over like that is bad enough as it is, let alone being heavily pregnant with your twat of a fiancé just standing there laughing while his unborn child and it's mother could be seriously injured.
cryssycakesx3 22
"heavily pregnant"
perez21__ 1
I just got a free PSN code from http://freepsncodes.cc
hobojo69 23
That's terrible your baby could have died or got really hurt, u may want to like get checked out to make sure everything is still ok, I hope everything's ok (: