By Almostfunny - 16/03/2011 13:01 - United States

Today, I emailed my potential boss a copy of my résumé. However, I didn't realize until too late that it was my fake resume, created for an English class project. Some of my former jobs included being a certified gangster, as well as the former president of Canada. FML
I agree, your life sucks 18 352
You deserved it 52 225

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Your American boss probably won't know there is a Prime Minister of Canada.


rallets 22

quite the impressive resume arent both jobs just the same thing basically? :P

LadiiFresH 0
marie_yuh100 3

48- we gave my dance team director teacher a flower just like the one in your picture! it was gorgeous(:

tjv3 10

wow! way not to pay attention.

hmm.. thats weird , because I'm a certified gangster as well :D

146 YES :D what should the name of our gang be?

persianjr1 7

it should be The Ke$has. lol jk.

blah :( I do not like that name... MissBunny does not look like Ke$ha :( (yes, I just spoke in third person...)

I would just because I'm clearly a gangster as well. us gangsters must stick together :D

193 is Persian -.- *sloshes macaroni on 193* get it right, fool!

shit I sloshed macaroni on the wrong person D: whoops.. sorry Persian ! I meant to hit 196 with the macaroni

persianjr1 7

well Persian is arien and therefore white. just saying.

200 only the manliest of men can handle them without crying.. so far only Chuck Norris has survived. -.- so no. Persian: well,.... oh. i seem to have made myself look rather stupid. *prepares to throw macaroni in face*

Persian seemed to have survived alright but maybe you caught your mistake in time that the majority of the macaroni blast hit 139

193 is chuck Norris in disguise. he'll be fine. :D

so I definitely meant 196 but I couldn't correct myself cuz of anti flood protection. But yeah I always knew Chuck Norris was Persian!

persianjr1 7

ah , that clears things up. yes, and if chuck Norris were a girl, he would be me in disguise. yeah. I said it. *cranks up Dora explorer soundtrack*

persianjr1 7

hey, random question: where you live, is it night or day. cause where I am it's night.

it's night. well, actually morning. lol 2:12 am. wbu?

persianjr1 7

it's 11:10 lol. you up at 2 on a Wednesday night? I have classes in the morning. what state you in?

hahaa so do I xD I never sleep though so whatever. Georgia. wbu?

persianjr1 7

haha. California. that's weird cause I. actually thought I had seen you somewhere. guess not cause ive never been to Georgia.

haha oh well apparently I look like ke$ha so maybe that's it. -.-

persianjr1 7

I have also never been to Georgia. coincidence? I think not.

no :) it's warm. like 75. its not snowing in Cali is it ? :0 ( we might have to wrap up this convo. I don't want to bother sirin with another 70-something long thread lol ) she's probably tired of seeing my face on every comment anyways :D

gustavov60 0

when keeping it real goes wrong lmao

persianjr1 7

na it's not snowing. your right. talk later. lol

222 you're popcorn boy -.- how dare you show your face in my presence -.- *starts up the macaroni*.

gustavov60 0

well it's kind of hard to do that when your on every post I look at no offense

Gondile 4

Where do you keep all that damn macaroni?

zendaddy0 0

wow op has some interesting past jobs

OwN3d3d 0

umm in canada its a prime minister not a president

you can tell OP is from the states, we dont have a president we have a prime minister ;)

Your American boss probably won't know there is a Prime Minister of Canada.

But I am sure he will be happy to finally meet a certified gangster! you are an idiot. it's a called a joke.

Lol I was thinking the EXACT same thing.

Epic_Phale615 0

All in favor that think 255 is a selfish, crotchity, lonely man who lives with his parents and has no friends say "I". "I"

zendaddy0 0
wendyyyy 0

225 - do you feel better now? that was a hella long post.

So.... If I got this right, you're saying that it's okay to make jokes about other countries if defending your own? Also, if you don't then you're a sad person? That seems a bit contradictory.

limestone819 0

255 You do realize you're getting overly defensive, right... Honestly 2 wasn't even that harsh. And people can generally tell when it's a joke... I guess you can't.

AceArctic 4

255, just stop before you make yourself sound any more stupid. It was a joke, so get over yourself and stop going on and on "aboot" it. :3

what the original comment was trying to say is that there is no "president of Canada" it's called a "prime minister"

samikitty961 8

Ayame 01, you are from tennessee. why are you getting all defensive about canadians?

Isn't the purpose of this site to laugh at the stupidity of everyone everywhere? Yes? Okay.

Former president of Canada? Please tell me that was part of the joke..

alfredrog 0

Lmfaooo !! pray ur boss find it funny xD

holymolybro 0

Oh my God, one of the few FMLs that made me legitimately laugh out loud :).

alfredrog 0

indeed of one the best FML ever xD

While you're at it you should put down that you're King of Africa

And the Kenyan Olympic 100m dash gold medalist.

Africa's not a country it's a continent... hence no king. become educated!

#123, you obviously idn't grasp the basic sarcasm in that comment. I'm ashamed that using sarcasm makes him uneducated.

see....that's what's wrong with "educated" people......they never get the joke! duhr.

Actually, I am intelligent and 90% of anything I say is sarcastic in some way or another.

AceArctic 4

Wait... The OP is the Nigerian prince that keeps asking for my social security number? :O

123: Yes, it is true that Africa is a continent and not a country. However; Canada also has a Prime Minister, not a President. Maybe you should lighten up a bit and just take a joke

ya you deserved that for thinking Canada has a President....

you are a retard. it's a joke. just like there aren't any certified gangsters.

TheDrifter 23

Really? I'm pretty sure gangsterism is a criminal charge, thereby making anyone convicted of it a certified gangster.

I'm a certified gangster. I worked really hard for my designation and I'd appreciate it if you stopped degrading the efforts and triumphs I have delivered and endured during the process. so please, recognize that there are certified gangsters, like myself, or I will have no choice but to pop a cap in your bum.

I believe a certified gangster would be more bold as to say "pop a cap in your ass."

263--*GASP!!!!!!* PUPPY!!!!!!!!! so cute!!!!!!!!

hahahahahahahahah 179 , and stfu 208 you just killed the joke :(

dcaruso 1

honestly I laughed. it's an honest mistake but I voted YDI for 2 reasons. the first being that your immature enough to have thought that handing in such an assignment was funny. the second being that you perpetuate the stereotype that Americans are close minded - Canada doesn't have a president... shame on you for making others look bad. still made me lol

fromthesuck 8

i was thinking the same thing... this person picks up on something wrong with president of canada yet completely overlooks certified gangster. and i'm betting the homework had something to do with comedy, or in the very least (like most literature classes try to inspire) some creativity. so with all that combined it seems it was actually pretty clever. congrats you have just been systematically discredited. but as for you op... with something as important as a resume you might want to double check that you have the right piece of paper the represents you

yeah. there are not any certified gangsters either. people need to lighten up. geez.

there are no certified gangsters and that could obviously be satire or a light-hearted assignment. dumbass

LOL! Now what does one have to do to become a certified ganster? Oh well, just explain to your boss in this economy you take what jobs you can :)

Now the OP eats humble pie. Wait a minute...