Today, I discovered my wife has been smoking weed for the past 2 years before she has sex with me. She said it was the only way she could force herself to have sex with me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my wife has quit smoking weed. Now she can stay up all night, whereas before she fell asleep around 9 almost every night, so now I get absolutely no time to myself. FML
Today, I discovered my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I've had in the last year. FML
Today, I found out that my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I have in our last year of marriage. FML
Today, my wife decided that to help her stop smoking, she's also giving up the things that make her crave a cigarette. Sex is one of them. FML
Today, I confronted my wife because I thought the many hours a day she spends at a local coffee shop were so she could smoke. Turns out she's cheating on me. FML
Today, my wife accused me of using her for sex. I'd only just admitted to her two days ago that I've been struggling to get it up to try and perform, after a hospital stay and a month of almost no sexual contact. FML
Today, after secretly smoking for more than two years, I decided to quit. I came home from work to see my wife holding a pack and asking me what was it doing behind the toilet seat. FML
Today, my wife has been super into sex lately, she even let me try some of the stuff she said no to before, and even surprised me with some of the kinky stuff she’s always wanted to try. Sounds great, right? Nope. Turns out she was overcompensating from the guilt of also fucking my coworker. FML
Today, my wife told me she was pregnant. I don't remember having sex since last year. FML
Today, I found out my wife is pregnant. The problem is she convinced me to get a vasectomy two years ago. FML
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Top comments
bittersweets 2
on the other hand: how nice of her to think of your needs
calcboi 0
Maybe it's because you're SO big you hurt her, and weed is the only thing that relaxes her enough to make the pain go away. Lolz.
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Comments (104)
hazelwolfeyes 0
i laughed...im sorry...thats just too funny... this is gonna sound super girly n i dread saying it...but communication is a major thing... talk to her about n see if you guys can repair that part of the relationship... if not...leave her...simple as that...
richarosky 0
gay
laleyla 0
I think you should be glad she is at least trying... maybe you should shower or anything?
coco_luver14 0
wow can't believe u didnt smell it...FYL
rowannn 0
maybe he was too high on crack to notice
SomeGuy1234 0
Sounds like you're not doing it for her, at least she's going out of her way to please you.
in_wonderland 1
smoking and ******* is the best. you should join her next time.
laleyla 0
I think you should be glad she is at least trying...
_chrissy_ 0
The poor woman probably just lacks sex drive and needs a little kick start. I don't think this has to do with you. If she isn't in love with you/is disgusted with you in general, she wouldn't sleep with you no matter how much weed she smoked. (Not saying all girls are like that, but she is your wife after all?)
mcguyver98 0
Dump the bitch!
Vagrarian 2
She should have talked to you about this long ago. How can you meet her needs if she won't communicate her needs to you? But if she's hung up about sex in general, or just hates sleeping with you in particular, then she needs to either give you freedom to fool around on the side, or she needs to agree to a divorce. This isn't a YDI at all.
ily_hun996 0
I said yes when I moderated this one :) anyway sucks for you! sorry....