Miscellaneous: Today, I received 7 notifications on facebook. Girls in my grade... - FML

11/07/2009 19:27 - United States

Today, I received 7 notifications on facebook. Girls in my grade were commenting on my photo because they knew the location of it. They then started to have a conversation and they planned a whole social event. On my photo. I wasn't invited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 401

You deserved it 4 330

This Charming Man

Good kid

You just had to be special

Broken heart

By Anonymous - 23/06/2021 16:01 - Spain

Today, my crush DM-ed my best friend, asking her to meet "without me knowing about it." We had been meeting occasionally for at least 8 years. In fact, a few days ago I'd told him that I was going to be in his town and he replied that he wouldn't be there that day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 035

You deserved it 236

01/03/2012 17:12 - United States

Today, my therapist clapped for me when I told her I'd made a friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 391

You deserved it 3 968

21/02/2009 11:22 - United States

Today, I came to school late because I had to drop off my daughter at school. When I got on campus, the security told me I was late but I said, "Oh no, I work here." and he said, "Oh like I haven't heard that one before." And he took me to detention. My boss, the Principal, had to bail me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 405

You deserved it 3 248

10/03/2011 11:09

Today, after setting up surveillance in my front yard to see whose dog keeps crapping on my lawn, I finally caught the culprit on film. It was my heroin addict neighbour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 183

You deserved it 3 578

Imitation is a form of flattery. Or is it?

By Anonymous - 08/08/2020 14:02

Today, and ever since he saw the infamous interview that was on TV the other day, every time I say something to my husband, he keeps quoting, "You can't do that!" and "You don't know that!" at me in Donald Trump's voice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 171

You deserved it 164

Time to lay down the law

By Christiana Lipphardt - 09/07/2021 20:01

Today, I was told that my in-laws are visiting next weekend. I already have anxiety, as they behaved really badly last time and treat our newborn like a toy and keep bothering her. My husband won't say anything as he wants to spare their feelings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 888

You deserved it 99

15/06/2009 05:38 - Canada

Today, I saw a few old co-workers at the bar. They recognized me and started calling me by the nickname they had for me that I was unaware of. It appears I was known as "butch megan" by the entire office for 2 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 863

You deserved it 4 098

04/12/2009 05:40 - United States

Today, at my school, we had the opening night of our production in which I act. None of my family or friends came. Basically, after 3 long months of hard work, the only person to "congratulate" to me after the show was the head of the theater department, who just wanted to tell me I was doing it wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 668

You deserved it 3 827

27/01/2015 11:45

Today, returning home from a party, I realised I'd forgotten my keys. My roommate was sleeping so soundly that after an hour of throwing gravel and ringing the doorbell, I had to give up and get a room at the hotel over the road. For €85 I had a view of my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 944

You deserved it 6 249

14/06/2009 19:14 - Canada

Today, as a prank, my friends put a big bucket of water on my door so that it would spill on me as I exited my room. It would have been funny if I hadn't been holding my $900 laptop as I was walking out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 711

You deserved it 3 083

04/08/2011 14:35 - United States

Today, I was taking a dump behind a dumpster. I suddenly heard a noise and a vibration against the dumpster. It was a garbage truck lifting it to collect the trash. The garbage men started laughing and took out their phones. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 832

You deserved it 79 753

24/09/2011 18:47 - United States

Today, I found out that the double spacing format in an essay refers to the space between each line, not the words. I've been pressing the space bar twice between each word all through high school and halfway through college. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 186

You deserved it 83 184

06/06/2010 23:48 - United States

Today, I went downstairs after a family argument. The front door was kicked in, the sink faucet was snapped off, and there were broken plates all over the kitchen floor. I later found out that the argument was over who left the refrigerator door open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 725

You deserved it 2 576

27/01/2012 22:03 - United States

Today, I had to make a doctor's appointment for my daughter. Apparently she thought it would be better to wipe herself with Clorox tough scrub disinfecting wipes than tell me she'd caught an STD. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 043

You deserved it 3 895

02/05/2009 17:05 - United States

Today, during lunch at school, a wave of nausea came over me. I ran to the bathroom and made it just in time. As I was throwing up, I set off the toilet's automatic flush and my vomit came flying back into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 606

You deserved it 5 197

15/02/2010 01:49 - United States

Spicy

Today, my wife came home drunk, telling me all about this amazing man she met at the club with her friends, and how she wanted to have sex with him but couldn't because she was on her period. What a present. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 411

You deserved it 2 523

30/01/2012 00:26 - United States

Today, I found out that Google+ has been automatically uploading my cell phone pictures as I take them. My friends have now seen pictures of me, my penis, and other things too horrifying to talk about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 685

You deserved it 46 245

17/07/2019 20:03

Today, I noticed that the roommate application site for college bugged when I first signed up, and my screen name and real name were swapped as a result. Since the site only displays the names of potential roommates and not our own, I've been unknowingly messaging potential roommates as Parakeet19 for about 2 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 438

You deserved it 230

07/09/2015 21:20 - Peru

Today, I went to a bar which has two stories. I was on the top floor and then went downstairs. As I was going down, I recognised a boy in a wheelchair and his friends trying to get him up. I helped and took the wheelchair. One of his friends decided it would be a good moment to steal my wallet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 308

You deserved it 1 834

23/12/2014 11:28 - Austria - Vienna

Today, I was yelled at in public for staring at a guy in a wheelchair. I was staring 'cause he was so good looking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 208

You deserved it 4 693

02/05/2010 07:08 - United States

Spicy

Today, I watched my boyfriend feed his cat and change his profile on both myspace and facebook before saying to me that he was "Too busy to have sex." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 798

You deserved it 5 653

30/08/2015 18:29 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I was talking to my mom about my issues with my girlfriend. While she was sympathizing, she slowly picked up my wallet, took $100 and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 026

You deserved it 2 248

31/03/2015 23:32 - United States - Billings

Today, a really drunk couple staggered into the store I work at. One of them yelled at me, "Hey you! Kid! Tell us where the booze is at!" This would have been funny if these people weren't my parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 768

You deserved it 2 713

24/03/2009 06:47 - United States

Today, I had to perform a skit in my class in which I have to wear tight spandex compression shorts. The class laughed pretty hard, and I felt like I had done a good job. Afterward, a girl I have a crush on said, "So the stereotype about Asian guys IS true." Through the fluorescent lights you could see my junk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 85 315

You deserved it 11 893

05/06/2015 12:21 - Sweden - G?teborg

Today, I was sick, and my voice was really low and raspy. A cute guy smiled at me and said hi, so I said hi too. He looked shocked and said, "Sorry bro, thought you were a girl." I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 455

You deserved it 2 274

Libido says no

By Anonymous - 16/08/2021 05:01 - United Kingdom - Norwich

Spicy

Today, I discovered my girlfriend of 5 years would rather split up than make any shred of effort to revive her utterly dead libido from the last 2 years. She promised the whole past month to make an effort, before admitting she never gave a shit when my patience with her ran out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 844

You deserved it 266

06/02/2013 06:01 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend called me a freak for wanting to have sex for a second night in a row. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 799

You deserved it 6 090

19/12/2016 19:22 - United States - Marquette

Today, I woke up to find out that the two front tires on our van were flat. Now we won't have a vehicle all week since the tire shop is booked solid. We just went through this with the rear tires two weeks ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 080

You deserved it 727

Good intentions

By Anonymous - 16/08/2021 19:01 - Indonesia - Bekasi

Today, I asked someone to work with me because I felt sorry for her. Turns out, she isn't at all helpful and refuses to work after school, just because she would miss her "beauty nap". She also made up dumb excuses for why she couldn't help me or the others. I wonder why no one wanted to be in a group with her… FML

I agree, your life sucks 720

You deserved it 117

28/11/2010 10:01 - United States

Today, after begging for over an hour, I had to pay my sister $20 to wax my back for me so my bra would stop painfully pulling at the hair I repulsively seem to be growing there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 983

You deserved it 4 652

07/05/2016 21:47 - Ukraine

Spicy

Today, my wife wanted to have a threesome. During our honeymoon. With the maid of honor. I didn't sign up for this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 068

You deserved it 4 223

17/08/2012 11:26 - United Kingdom - Hounslow

Today, my dog was run over. The man who ran over my dog was taking his own dog to the emergency vet. As the man awkwardly tried to apologise to me, he said, "Think of the irony". FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 802

You deserved it 1 975

07/05/2009 16:17 - United States

Spicy

Today, I found out that the guy i've been having sex with for over a month didn't know my name until today. No wonder he always ever called me 'baby.' FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 936

You deserved it 70 528

17/11/2010 12:09 - United Kingdom

Today, it was my first day back to work since having my first baby. To show I had caught up on everything, I had to give a presentation at the end of the day to the heads of my department. It went really well until the end, when one of them pointed out that breast-milk had been leaking through my clothes the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 222

You deserved it 3 327

Weirded out

By Anonymous - 29/09/2021 02:01

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend told me she is breaking up with me for my friend, because she likes people with diaper fetishes. I had no clue either of them liked that stuff. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 109

You deserved it 67

04/06/2010 17:36 - Canada

Today, my coworker told me she knew about my secret boyfriend because she has a "sixth sense" about these things. I'm too embarrassed to tell her I'm desperately single and the last date I went on was three years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 351

You deserved it 4 008

14/09/2009 10:05 - United Kingdom

Today, I just came back from the vet. I spent a lot of money on a pet tortoise at the local pet store and it didn't come out of its shell when I bought it. The owner just said it sleeps in the day and it'll be shy for a week or so. Turns out it was dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 466

You deserved it 9 460

Love hurts

By Sam - 27/08/2020 23:02 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I was diagnosed with a condition where blood vessels in my brain spasm just before orgasm, resulting in me getting a wicked migraine that lasts for days. The only cure? No more orgasms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 430

You deserved it 116

Thanks, but no thanks

By Anonymous - 29/09/2019 02:01

Today, I got fired from the community service I was doing out of kindness. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 411

You deserved it 271

14/02/2010 05:07 - France

Today, my neighbor's dog bit me, it was extremely painful. The gash in my leg was deep and bleeding like crazy. When I finally got into my house screaming in agonizing pain, my mother said "Quit bitching, walk it off and you'll be fine." My leg is purple now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 885

You deserved it 3 323

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Saturday 11 July 2009 23:03

Show up and if they ask, say you assumed you were included since all the notifications were on your page.

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Saturday 11 July 2009 23:35

That's why you have a FACEBOOK WALL. They should use it instead of having a conversation on her photo, I think that was quite rude and annoying because your receiving notifications that doesn't even concern her.

Comments

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Saturday 11 July 2009 22:55

dude he's an asshole =(

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Saturday 11 July 2009 23:00

wrong fml! FAIL

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Sunday 12 July 2009 12:32

lol FAIL... anyways, thught u were a guy first which is lame cause u could comment and invite urself there. chicks' thought is akward so understandably u were too shy to say anything.

MsTs1 0

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Monday 13 July 2009 7:40

give them all some dick and rip their delicious hymen

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Tuesday 16 March 2010 14:20

that's is a really hard choice either ur happiness or someones life

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Tuesday 28 December 2010 12:01

that's happening on my fbook but instead of arranging things there are three girls arguing over which one deserves me more. awkward, but I like it.

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Sunday 15 April 2012 1:05

Can you say " im a fuckin tard"?

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Saturday 11 July 2009 22:56

ahhh that sucks. you should comment on it too.

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Saturday 11 July 2009 23:00

Wow, yeah, FYL man, that's terrible.. NOBODY GIVES A FUCK!!

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Saturday 11 July 2009 23:03

so what?

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Sunday 12 July 2009 3:32

agreed. this was lame.

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Saturday 11 July 2009 23:03

Show up and if they ask, say you assumed you were included since all the notifications were on your page.

cuterthanuthink 0

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Saturday 11 July 2009 23:04

this is why i hate facebook. ._.

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Saturday 11 July 2009 23:08

yup, facebook sucks. A lot.

emilysanftwsom 0

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Sunday 12 July 2009 3:24

Facebook is awesome!

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Sunday 12 July 2009 4:33

better than myspace... lol

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Wednesday 24 March 2010 7:03

only gay Americans use myspace...

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Wednesday 16 June 2010 8:55

Myspace will always kick Facebook's ass. Myspace was created for people to express themselves... Facebook was created for people to become addicted to their little games and pay them money.

fnool 0

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Saturday 11 July 2009 23:05

I've seen this before.

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Saturday 11 July 2009 23:06

wow that was dumb.... just because someone talks about a party on one of your photos doesnt mean you're invited...

I_Piss_Glitter 0

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Saturday 11 July 2009 23:18

Agreed.

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Sunday 12 July 2009 0:35

Um, she knew she wasn't invited... Talking about a social event in front of someone who isn't invited is rude, bitchy, and passive-aggressive.

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Monday 13 July 2009 2:45

it was on the computer....which means the girl who wasnt invited needs to suck it up because it could have been a lot worse. The other girls could have actually talked about it IN FRONT of her IN PERSON. and its not "rude, bitchy, and passive-aggressive."....it was just convenient for those girls to have a conversation on the photo.

redbluegreen 40

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Saturday 11 July 2009 23:07

Show up anyway, because you're the one that brought them together. ( :

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Saturday 11 July 2009 23:16

omg larua i am that girl that planned that whole thing!

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Sunday 12 July 2009 1:36

XD

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Sunday 12 July 2009 2:48

WTF?

Nearly

Today, I just had the best sex in all my life. After that, my ex-girlfriend dumped me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57

You deserved it 6

Today, I found out my dog of 11 years has very severe cancer. Her spleen, which has swollen to the size of a football, had a small rupture a day ago and would fatally within a week, we'll be putting her down tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 123

You deserved it 8

Spicy

Spicy

Today, I’d been bicurious for years but always much too shy to seek out a woman to attempt intimacy. Well, I finally hooked up with a girl I’ve had a crush on for a while. Not only was it an amazing, mind-blowing experience, she also left me with a crotch searing yeast infection from hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 163

You deserved it 36

Today, for the first time I had to lie to the man I intend to marry, because I had a very intense and hot dream about Leslie Nielsen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 342

You deserved it 104