Today, I decided to be a generous guy and slip a dollar from my pocket to a beggar. Turns out I'd slipped my hard-earned $100 bill instead. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I found a $100 bill on the ground and was thinking, "I'm so lucky!!" I opened my wallet to find that $300 was missing. I looked back and saw some guy picking up $300. FML
Today, as I was coming out of McDonald's, there was a street musician playing outside. He had his saxophone case open for money. I meant to give him a ten, and it wasn't until I got home later that I realized I'd accidentally given him a hundred-dollar bill. FML
Today, I went shopping with a friend. She picked up a hundred dollars on the floor that somebody dropped. I told her, "I feel sorry for the retard who dropped the money." When I got home, I checked my purse and realized that I was missing a hundred dollars. FML
Today, I spotted a $100 bill on the ground. Being a little strapped for cash, I excitedly picked it up. I discovered it was one of those religious tract papers made to look like a folded bill, with a message scolding me for being greedy. FML
Today, a customer handed me a 100 dollar bill. He then told me that it was my tip for doing a good job. He snatched it away just as I touched it, laughed, and said, "Just kidding." He then took his money and left the store. FML
Today, I was walking through a rich part of the city and saw 2 dollars on the ground. I didn't pick it so people wouldn't think I was poor. FML
Today, I put my paycheck in my wallet, intending to cash it in the next day. Later on, I met up with a friend and went to a party. I ended up getting so drunk, I gave away my $400 check in exchange for a pack of smokes, thinking it was a $5 bill. FML
Today, while at the vending machine, I put in my $20 instead of my $1. I got my change back in quarters. FML
Today, when I went to pay for my groceries, I accidentally handed the cashier a condom instead of my $20. FML
Today, I was walking down the street, when a man behind me tapped me on the shoulder. He gave a $5 bill and said that he thought I had dropped it. Not having the integrity to turn him down, I took it. I spent the next 20 minutes being chased by a crazy hobo who claimed that it was his. FML
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Top comments
irollup 4
Looks like you were feeling pretty generous.
ciarafox9 9
I literally FELT your pain while reading this..
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Comments (245)
Enslaved 38
It was nice of you but if I knew I had a $100. on my person, I'd would have doubt checked. I once gave a homeless person money that came to my job. They came back EVERYDAY after, expecting the same generosity and I ended up feeling used and resentful. Now I have mixed feelings about encouraging begging behavior and I feel selfish that I do because I know I'm better off then them. -Anyways vent! Lol
Suks2beeme 7
Nah.... It's NOT wrong to be selfish. Read up on Ayn Rand. That's the way right there. It's most certainly not the norm and hard to live by when people expect others to give with closed eyes but can be done.
Cmdr_Shepard 17
I tried to read Atlas Struggled but I got so bored after the first few chapters, I just threw it on the shelf. IMO Rand is extremely overrated, especially her philosophy. It's OK to have self-interests and want to express your individuality. But humans are social creatures and we naturally build societies and achieve happiness together. Objectivism looks great on paper but in reality, it doesn't hold much water. Anyway, Enslaved, don't feel bad about turning the homeless man down. As I said in previous comments, your money is better spent with homeless shelters and organizations.
rainbowbigbird 7
Beggars can actually make a decent living. Anywhere between $75 and $300 a day (that's $2,100 to $8,400 a month). And that's cash. You just boosted his numbers OP.
livedandlaughed 10
Hopefully he spends your hard earned money well!
FckYoCOUCH 6
With that much, you should at least get a little hand job included.
bubo_fml 11
Next time your down town & smell an ungodly stench of pungent piss, remember, your $100.00 added to proliferating that aroma...Thanks a lot, ya Fukka!
Pentadude 3
That's what happens to Americans when they stick to green bills for all values :P
codbloodedkill3r 0
Lookalike he'll be having a great time in hobo central tonite
Smiff80 0
Be honest did you try to go and get it back?
iDaniel525 8
Hey, who knows..you probably provided him with a months worth of food. Although, it sucks that you lost $100. You did it for a good reason--hopefully.
perdix 31
A fool and his money are soon parted. It seems it already happened today. The beggar's going get get some high quality hooch, and may spend the rest on $10 blow jobs, or he might spring for fewer of the $20 ones. Doesn't that warm the cockles of your heart?
Strafeh 9
Only when it's Tuesday of a leap year