Today, I broke my arm. When I got home from the doctors with my cast, I fell asleep on the couch from the medicine. When I woke up, there were swastikas, "I love the KKK", and multiple penises written all over my cast. My dad thought it would be funny. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I fell asleep on the way to a pool party and woke up covered in sharpie swastikas and dicks. FML
Today, I was laying on the couch with a cast on my broken ankle. My brother thought it would be funny to shoot my cast with a high-powered pellet gun. It went straight through the cast and now I need to go back to the hospital. FML
Today, I fell down the stairs and broke my arm. I went into hospital to get it put in a cast, but still went into school afterwards. I got written up for truancy because I didn't have a doctor's note. The cast was still on my arm. FML
Today, my dad got drunk and played a practical joke on me; a practical joke that resulted in my knee being broken. Now, I'm sitting in a hospital bed all alone while my dad hunts for "hot nurses". FML
Today, after a stay at the hospital for two broken legs, I finally got home and attempted to relax. My dad went to hand me the remote and dropped it right on my nuts. FML
Today, I'm sitting in the emergency room because my girlfriend thought it would be funny to superglue my penis to my thigh while I was sleeping. FML
Today, I went to the hospital to get a cast that I have been wearing for the past three months removed from my wrist. Thanks to said cast, I couldn't have any summer fun at all. The doctor took a final X-ray and said, "Well look at that, your wrist wasn't fractured to begin with." FML
Today, I fell off of the deck in my backyard, which wouldn't have been that bad if my drunk, idiot brother hadn't jumped off behind me yelling, "FINISH HIM!" while delivering a bone-crushing body slam. He is fine. I, however, am currently getting a cast for a broken arm. FML
Today, my "friend" put itching powder in my cast while I was sleeping. FML
Today, my dad picked me up from school, something he'll be doing while my broken leg heals. He thought it'd be hilarious to arrive early and ask the staff where his "crippled" son was, loudly saying I'd broken my leg in a "masturbation-related accident". FML
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Top comments
robbilee 14
just paint it or cover it with marker
stacster 0
well grab a sharpie and start turning penises into space ships
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Comments (243)
bobjoefredsky 0
it IS funny
MrBond007_fml 6
108- it's your the only one who gets it! its totally the first one!!!
bobjoefredsky 0
it IS funny and to all you morons who think your dad is a douchebag, are the ones who most likely get beaten up by muggers ad gangstas cuz they are socially awkward. I'm just saying. as for u, u probably have a great sense of humor (from your dad) and u should respect him more. I'm not being bossy it's just what I would do.
DocBastard 40
Bobjoe, why don't you shut your ignorant little mouth and go do some homework. Swastikas and the Klan are funny to you? Really? Sure, you're entitled to your opinion, but there is no humour in either. Ask any Jew if swastikas are funny. Ask any black person if the Klan is funny. Then express your stupid little opinion to either and see how quickly you get the shit beaten out of you. Grow up and get a ******* clue, little boy.
pinkcowgirl1 0
Step 1. Go to tsc & buy $1.00 roll of vet wrap. 2. Wrap your cast with said vet wrap. 3. Stop being a little b*#ch & get over it.
DVecc 0
I think we should just wipe out the redneck states... the United States would be so much better off without them
ashleymorin 2
duude thaat is HILARIOUS ! if i were you i would leave it like that .
Arschloch04 0
Your father is Troll Dad?
ShrukiantheMad 0
Dear England/Aussie... Pease take me away from America! I hate it here! I wish to have thoufhtful intelligent concersations with men and womeb of caliber, not the idiot racist sexist pigs of America, oh and by the football sucks, but Futbol is awesome :D
kingdomhearts3 0
Maybe it would be easier to have intelligent and "thoufhtful" "concersations" with your fellow countrymen if you made an attempt to speak the same language is them...I imagine it would be difficult to converse with others of your "caliber" if you have no means of communication... Pease? thoufhtful? concersations? womeb? caliber? oh and by the football sucks? I don't even have a clue what you were attempting to say in the last one...Before you knock America (which I myself am no fan of), you should learn some basic communication skills.
ShrukiantheMad 0
Thoughtful* Women* Conversations* damn ipod lag
Helloiloveyou199_fml 0
Koots klutz Klan