Today, for Valentine's Day, my boyfriend gave me the half-eaten chocolate bar that I left in his fridge two weeks ago. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend gave me a fancy chocolate candy and I got angry at him for forgetting that I'm allergic to chocolate and threw the candy into the garbage disposal. Turns out, he had spent a ton of money getting a chocolatier to put an engagement ring inside the candy that I just destroyed. FML
Today, for Valentine’s Day, I got my boyfriend chocolates, a new Xbox game and planned lots of kinky sexy time. He ate the chocolate, orgasmed after three thrusts, had a 2-hour nap, then ignored me while playing the new game all afternoon. He didn’t get me anything, not even my own orgasm. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me a box of chocolates for Christmas. I thought it was sweet until I noticed the heart drawn on the back. It's the same box of chocolates I gave him for Christmas. Christmas last year. FML
Today, it’s Valentine’s Day. My boyfriend promised me that instead of a packed chain restaurant we would have “dinner under the stars.” We ended up having Slurpees and Slim Jims in the 7-Eleven parking lot. He called me ungrateful for not appreciating his “romantic gesture.” FML
Today, I hit a new low when I caught myself eating the chocolates that were meant to be part of my boyfriend's Christmas presents. FML
Today, I went to the doctor, only to find out I can no longer eat chocolate, my favorite food. When I got home, my boyfriend took the chocolate cake I'd been eating from the fridge, sat down in front of me, and ate the whole thing without breaking eye contact. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me a $100 gift card for Victoria's Secret. Suspicious, I checked the receipt he'd left in the bag. Turns out he had bought it during the two weeks we were broken up for some other girl who rejected him, so decided to give it to me instead. FML
Today, I went to the store to get Valentine's Day gifts to decorate my boyfriend's and my new apartment. He was there shopping with his wife. FML
Today, my boyfriend came round to drop off some underwear, which I'd left at his house. Not all of what he brought was mine. FML
Today, I pointed out to my boyfriend how Valentine's day, my birthday, and our one-year anniversary were all coming up in the next few weeks. He then promptly broke up with me. FML
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Top comments
thebeautybleeds 17
At least he remembered it was Valentine's day?
DocBastard 40
You would perhaps prefer that he either ate the whole thing or left it out in the sun so it would melt? Show some gratitude. All I got today was a cigarette butt and a purple nurple.
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Comments (171)
Luli17 1
Be happy you got something, My fiance left for Marine basic training yesterday. wont hear from him for two weeks.
hammie27 3
Because YOU'RE the one going through hell in that situation...selfish
Luli17 1
umm i know his going trough hell, and its not being self fish, you must not know what it feels like to be with someone for 3 years....
hammie27 3
Oh I know what it's like to be with someone a lot longer...and to be without them. I also know what it's like to be a service member and be sick of hearing the whining from the people who choose to be in a relationship with one yet whine about them being gone and missing stuff...especially pointless commercialized holidays.
Cheylea 10
I agree with 85. She's not being selfish, if I were her on Valentines I would feel the same way. Besides she's entitled to say whatever she feels like, it's a public website.
Michael_92 20
@90 hush no one wants to hear your negative attitude. @85 just wait he will be back to see you soon enough. Try and make the time pass with something.
mariaealvarez 1
whos keeping u with him?!?
SadIife 6
You should have thrown it out if you weren't going to eat it. 2 weeks is long...
burtonbullet 10
Hey, at least he saved it and didn't eat the bar.
hammie27 3
Oh boo hoo! Quit your crying...so your bf didn't get you something on a completely commercialized holiday that means nothing. Not an FML. YDI for getting sucked into the commercial bs and expecting a gift just because retail companies push the same old cliche shit at us every February.
mopar_chick 10
Get over it. Valentines day isn't even important.
hammie27 3
Amen!
maddy99baerwald 0
What a sweetheart
RensM 22
Valentines is supposed to be a day for secret lovers/crushes to come forward.. If he is your boyfriend it is hardly a secret crush anymore so why even expect something. It's just the greedyness of the hallmark generation I supposed.
chels1994 11
Well, you're with him for a reason (whatever it may be) so don't complain; today is about more than just getting things
sxdryv 14
U do realize that's his way of saying, "don't leave half eaten chocolate bars in MY fridge for two weeks...what am I your maid!?"