Today, for Valentine's Day, my boyfriend gave me the half-eaten chocolate bar that I left in his fridge two weeks ago. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend gave me a fancy chocolate candy and I got angry at him for forgetting that I'm allergic to chocolate and threw the candy into the garbage disposal. Turns out, he had spent a ton of money getting a chocolatier to put an engagement ring inside the candy that I just destroyed. FML
Today, for Valentine’s Day, I got my boyfriend chocolates, a new Xbox game and planned lots of kinky sexy time. He ate the chocolate, orgasmed after three thrusts, had a 2-hour nap, then ignored me while playing the new game all afternoon. He didn’t get me anything, not even my own orgasm. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me a box of chocolates for Christmas. I thought it was sweet until I noticed the heart drawn on the back. It's the same box of chocolates I gave him for Christmas. Christmas last year. FML
Today, it’s Valentine’s Day. My boyfriend promised me that instead of a packed chain restaurant we would have “dinner under the stars.” We ended up having Slurpees and Slim Jims in the 7-Eleven parking lot. He called me ungrateful for not appreciating his “romantic gesture.” FML
Today, I hit a new low when I caught myself eating the chocolates that were meant to be part of my boyfriend's Christmas presents. FML
Today, I went to the doctor, only to find out I can no longer eat chocolate, my favorite food. When I got home, my boyfriend took the chocolate cake I'd been eating from the fridge, sat down in front of me, and ate the whole thing without breaking eye contact. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me a $100 gift card for Victoria's Secret. Suspicious, I checked the receipt he'd left in the bag. Turns out he had bought it during the two weeks we were broken up for some other girl who rejected him, so decided to give it to me instead. FML
Today, I went to the store to get Valentine's Day gifts to decorate my boyfriend's and my new apartment. He was there shopping with his wife. FML
Today, my boyfriend came round to drop off some underwear, which I'd left at his house. Not all of what he brought was mine. FML
Today, I pointed out to my boyfriend how Valentine's day, my birthday, and our one-year anniversary were all coming up in the next few weeks. He then promptly broke up with me. FML
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Top comments
thebeautybleeds 17
At least he remembered it was Valentine's day?
DocBastard 40
You would perhaps prefer that he either ate the whole thing or left it out in the sun so it would melt? Show some gratitude. All I got today was a cigarette butt and a purple nurple.
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Comments (171)
ArchaeologyDude1 5
Hahahahahahahahaha. Priceless. XD
xxLovePinkxx 0
Real score
Skellig 2
Who cares? I don't get my boyfriend anything, he doesn't get me anything. Why blow money on overpriced cards and trash candy, anyway?
missalice0306 19
Oh cry me a river
akaay 3
LOL what an ass!
TomAWJones19 4
Why do people need to show their love based on materialistic possessions? Surely showing your other half how much you love them during the year is better than just one day out of the year? But that being said, if that's all he could do for you, then I doubt he's the type that is affectionate year round. FYL OP!
thebottomdog 0
He gave you something and he remembered so be happy with what you got my girl dumped me for valentines day lol
TheNinjaBacon 8
Aww how sweet ;(
Silverfoxx92 0
And he wants YOU to have it :D
bootcut 1
It better have been a twix!