Today, during a family game of basketball, my 15 year old son shoved me hard to get the ball. I fell and cut my arm badly on the ground. I yelled at him for being an idiot. He replied "Oh jeez, a bleeding woman being a bitch, what a fucking shocker." My husband doubled over laughing. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I argued heavily with my dad over being dragged to a family game of lacrosse. All through the game, he kept "accidentally" hurling the ball straight at me on the sideline. After he eventually nailed me straight in the heart, he screamed at me to "get out of the fucking way". FML
Today, I'm playing basketball with my little brother. After jokingly blocking his shot, he turns to me and says, "You're a bitch." He's 6. After I asked him where he heard that word, he responded with, "Daddy calls you that when you're not around." FML
Today, my little brother was feeling like the god damned bratty douchebag he is and hurled a basketball at me. It missed, hit the wall, and rebounded straight into his face. He burst into tears, and I'm now grounded because my parents believed him when he said I threw it at him. FML
Today, at a mixed-family game of rugby, my dad resorted to calling me a "goddamned accident" and eventually body-slamming me, just so I'd stop playing long enough for his team to score. FML
Today, during a heated argument with my son, I lost my temper and called him a son of a bitch. He enthusiastically agreed. FML
Today, my 6 year-old son and his cousin were play boxing. For fun, I taught them some real moves. I guess my son is a natural but my nephew got hit so hard he fell over and broke his arm. Now I have to explain this to my wife and her sister. FML
Today, my 15-year-old son got so enraged at a fly that kept harassing him, that he ended up slapping himself in the face as it flew by him. This caused him to fall out of his chair, at which point he broke down into a mess of tears, humiliating me in front of everyone. FML
Today, my boyfriend was buying a new hockey stick; to test it out he started hitting a ball around the aisle and decided to shoot it back into its bin. Instead the ball hit me dead in the mouth, giving me a fat lip. Instead of consoling me, my boyfriend yelled "GOAL!" FML
Today, I was play-wrestling with my girlfriend. I ended up with a cut, three bruises on my arm and a black eye. She just giggled the entire time. FML
Today, I was babysitting my neighbor's kid. We were playing in the yard, when he fell and got a small scratch on his leg. I gasp, and he takes a huge breath in and yells, "FUUUCK!!!" as loud as possible. The parents thought it was me, and the mother slapped me in the face. FML
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Top comments
davincidasecond 24
Grounded. For. Life.
604 11
Sounds like two guys in the house need to be grounded.
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Comments (166)
Elsweyr_fml 9
How disrespectful of them. Perhaps you need to have a talk with your son and husband about what is not okay and what is. And I think a grounding is in order for both of them. FYL OP.
steppingonlegos 2
Maybe if you and your husband raised raised your son better he wouldn't spew profanities at you, much less be so disrespectful.
skyeyez9 24
I would have hurled the basketball at his face when he is asleep that night.
HawaiiThad 14
YLS for getting shoved too hard, for your son's comments, and for your husband's reaction, but you earn a YDI for calling your son an idiot. Be a better example, mom.
TheLadyOpal 30
Maybe your next activity as a family should be counseling.
nialls_girl 13
Grounded for life.
thenewgirl29 20
I would have smacked the shit out of both of them and given him a reason to call you a bitch.
Imareth 10
I'm sorry, but you're calling your son an idiot, then FMLing when he disrespects you? Kids reflect their environment. If your son treats you this way, maybe think about your own approach towards him. (And to be fair, if your husband is laughing at this, it's sending a message that it's acceptable behaviour. You both need to have a talk about it.)
Hellishowl 17
While that is wildly rude, it's also funny as heck!
mishwarner 14
You raised him to talk this way or you allowed your partner to?
limabeans101029 20
The way they're raised doesn't determine every single thing a child will do. Friends and the media, among other things, can be a big influence too.
colton200456 6
Oh yeah? And parents aren't a big part of it? The people that take care of you a good portion of your life?
jazman195 20
#251 They certainly are but at the same time, no matter what you teach your children, they will say the **** word if they want to.