Today, due to the cold, windy weather, I decided to wear my brand-new cute (and expensive) jacket that has a faux-fur hood. As I walked down the street, numerous PETA members attacked me with red liquid. I'm a Vegan and an animal-rights activist. FML
Collection
Black Friday
70% off something you didn't need, a stampede and a cart that crashes at checkout. Thanks, Black Friday.
Today, I went on a date with a great vegan guy in my class. We went to a vegi-restaurant, I dutifully ate all the meatless dishes, but he seemed pissed about something, and other diners kept giving me angry looks. After we left, I realised I'd worn my leather jacket to the date. FML
Today, as I was walking my dog, some self-righteous animal activist berated me on how it was animal abuse to put my dog on a leash. Despite warning her, she crouched down to undo it, my dog charged at her, giving her a gash on the cheek. She kicked my dog for it, and is now threatening to sue me. FML
Today, I realized I've become a stereotypical militant vegan when I told a friend that we should start raising Lone Star ticks and dropping them around town so we could spread meat allergies and force people to eat vegan. FML
Today, I was protesting for animal rights. On my way home, I accidentally hit a pig with my car. I freaked out and got out to check to see if it was OK. It knocked me over, spraining my wrist, and it pissed all over my pants. FML
Today, I was lectured by a self-professed vegan over my "barbaric" eating habits, in between her scarfing down a tuna fish sandwich. FML
Today, my roommate decided to go vegan after watching a PETA video. She began this new-found lifestyle by throwing out all of the non-vegan items in the house, including some prime rib we had recently purchased, all of our ice cream, and my chocolate stash. FML
Today, I bought a jacket with real fur on it. Turns out, i'm allergic and now my ears look like they have herpes on them. FML
Today, my mom called me to the laundry room after she saw a dead animal in there. I took a look and agreed we should call animal control. After ten minutes of freaking out, they finally arrived to confirm that the dead animal was the hood to my winter jacket. FML
Today, I was called ugly and viciously ridiculed by a couple of teenage girls. They were wearing uggs and vests that made them look like a freak-show of bleached pomeranians. FML
Today, my boss was hosting some client representatives for a meeting and had offered to buy everyone lunch. The "healthy" place he's ordering from made me sick last time, so I'd politely opted out. At lunch, the reps glared at me in the meeting room as I ate my homemade chili con carne. Turns out they're all vegans. FML
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Top comments
KeithHarris 0
Serves you right for wearing fake animals. Next time wear the real thing so you'll at least deserve getting pelted with fake animal blood. :-D PETA members are dicks.
michellaneous 0
whats with the red liquids lately? well, PETA is a bit extreme, but they shouldn't be going around bombarding people with red liquids!
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Comments (510)
MissNae 0
@ #1 and the rest who think it was the OP's fault for wearing FAUX fur you are idiots. She was assaulted over clothing. I don't agree with people wearing fur but I don't think anyone has a right to assault you if you do. If the PETA people were close enough to spray her, they should have simply reached out and felt the jacket first. Faux fur feels completely different to real fur.
Jonesy666 0
Wow, i didn't know animal rights activists would damage peoples property
Larawr 0
Faux-fur and leather is entirely fine. Saying veg*ns should wear them is like saying we shouldn't eat faux-meats (Quorn, etc), which is ridiculous. Faux-fur is supporting the cruelty free alternative. PETA activists aside, people don't just walk down the street, see fur-looking clothing, and think "oh that must be real fur, they support the death of animals for fashion" most people wouldn't even think about it, so it's not really supporting the real industry. Spending money on real fur supports the industry. Spending money on faux-fur shows there is demand for the cruelty-free alternative. #52, we were designed to eat you? Cool! When are you being cooked and served, then? That joke aside, I do know what you mean even though you worded it poorly. We weren't designed to eat flesh. Do some research, or just try killing a cow yourself (no guns, or knives, try doing it how a lion does), and eating it raw. When you are suffering greatly from the raw-cow-flesh consumption, if you succeed in killing the cow, remind me I'm meant to eat flesh.
sweetonsno 1
Vegans shouldn't eat Quorn because it isn't vegan. It contains egg whites. It also is indeed important to check on the exact material of fake fur, as it can be made from wool or animal hair.
Bertrandberticus 0
Numbers one and six. You are aware that the PETA website makes a number of recommendations for places where one may purchas fake fur and fake leather, right? You are aware that the PETA website raffles away faux fur coats and pins that support replacing real fur clothing with fake fur clothing, right? If that is the case, then are you also aware that I found all this out by googling the terms "faux fur peta" (except without quotation marks) and clicking on the first and third entries, both of which are from the PETA website? In the space of about thirty seconds? Animal rights activists, even the crazy ones who **** shit up for fun, have ben promoting fake fur as a reasonable alternative to the real deal for a while now. P.S. PETA sucks, especially their "sea kittens" campaign.
noisefl00r 0
umm...i'm a vegan & an animal rights activist, and I wear fake fur too. word @ #56
Bertrandberticus 0
And p.s. 56, the fact that one man is incapable of taking down a fully grown wildebeest doesn't mean that he was not "designed" (caveat: animals are not actually designed) to eat meat. We originally fit into an omnivorous ecological niche because we have the mental capacity to build tools that allow us to take down that wildebeest and then share it with our family and buddies. If you look at our dental structure, it doesn't really scream pure herbivory. Then again, nobody actually NEEDS to eat meat to survive, since all of the nutrients the body needs can be found elsewhere if one knows where to look.
knitbitch 0
I am vegetarian, but that by no means makes me agree with their actions. PETA, you are full of shit and you shouldn't just assume it was real fur! You are the reason people constantly make fun of me for being vegetarian, you are all pyscho. It's not what you are trying to accomplish that's awful, it's how you "accomplish" it.
Loe_307 0
Yea PETA??? PETA sux. The only thing good about PETA are their ads and their idea. The practices are insane though. Some people like hamburgers but use turkey or soy for their health. Some people like to get laid but jack-off instead. Same principal, she liked the look and feel of fur but didn't want to harm a real animal. I commend her on that at least.
USNA_Midshipman 0
I think people should throw dog shit on PETA if they love animals that much. They must be some dumbasses if they dont stop for one second for a person to make their case, "IT'S FAUX FUR!"
half_back 0
epic fail