Today, I was protesting for animal rights. On my way home, I accidentally hit a pig with my car. I freaked out and got out to check to see if it was OK. It knocked me over, spraining my wrist, and it pissed all over my pants. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I accidentally ran over a squirrel on the road. I was late for work so I didn't stop. Later, someone keyed the word PETA into the side of my car. FML
Today, I saw a poor helpless cat in the middle of the road while driving. I pulled over and scooped it in my arms to bring it to safety. Not only did I get mauled and scratched by the cat, my car also wasn't put in park and rolled away hitting a parked car. FML
Today, I ran over a cat while driving home. I tried to keep myself together but couldn't help but cry because of how bad I felt. Through my tears I failed to notice a porcupine in the middle of the road. Yep, I hit him too. FML
Today, I was driving along when the car in front of me ran over an animal. I only realised this when a chunk of flesh and blood landed on my windscreen. I put my wipers on to get rid of it but instead it got stuck underneath the wipers and smeared all over the screen. FML
Today, I was riding my bike along a road and a deer jumped out from the tree line, knocking me to the ground and breaking my arm. Someone pulled over to see if I was alright, running over my bike in the process. FML
Today, I broke my wrist when I got into a disagreement with a horse. FML
Today, I was walking my husky when she saw a cat and bolted toward it. I couldn't let go of the leash because my hand was tangled up. Forced to run along, I ran into a parked van at full sprint. I lost my dog, broke two ribs and have to pay for the dent in the van. FML
Today, on my rush to get home from work to use the bathroom, I hit a deer. It startled me so badly that I wet myself. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were walking around when she got lost in a crowd. And me, being a pig, playfully grabbed her butt. I realized it wasn't hers when the guy whose butt I'd grabbed by accident knocked me unconscious. FML
Today, I found myself locked out of my house. I had to squeeze myself through a tiny window around the back. While hanging upside down, my hood fell over my head. My dog ran through to investigate the noise and ravaged me thinking I was a burglar. I then fell and broke my wrist. FML
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Top comments
acmariner99 25
Mmmm ... bacon.
Sady_Ct 38
OP got off lightly, most feral, injured or pissed off pigs can be deadly. Most of us here in Australia know not to get out of our cars and check until we are a decent distance down the road. Feral pigs can get bigger than cars and have been known to gore humans without hesitation.
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Comments (11)
acmariner99 25
Mmmm ... bacon.
RichardPencil 32
And then you when to a protest demanding free pork chops for everyone!
bl3ur0z3 17
Good news! The pig is ok.
BurnInDemonFire 39
Sure... blame the pig.
psychgirl123 15
Where do you live that pigs roam like that? Genuine question. I live about 45 mins from a metropolitan city in Canada so that may be why I’ve never seen a pig roam wild.
Callyn 47
A good portion of the America's. The Spanish liked to bring pigs with them wherever they went and they're actually real hard to keep captive.
Weslea Sanchez 12
Rural areas. I grew up in Colorado and in my hometown (less than 2000 people) cows and other farm animals would wander the city streets because of how often they would get out. The police usually took the smaller ones back to their owners or called them to come get them
Sady_Ct 38
I live in Australia, tonnes of feral pigs here. Most of us also know not to **** with pissed off or injured pigs and just keep driving. They can be deadly.
psychgirl123 15
I’ve lived in small towns too (less than 2000) but I guess it just depends WHERE the small town is. I’ve lived in Ontario mostly but did live in Sask on a reserve, but no wild animals there. Small places in Ontario do have wild cows&horses and such that sometimes escape their farm; but nothing like wild pigs. Pigs are farm animals here
Sady_Ct 38
OP got off lightly, most feral, injured or pissed off pigs can be deadly. Most of us here in Australia know not to get out of our cars and check until we are a decent distance down the road. Feral pigs can get bigger than cars and have been known to gore humans without hesitation.
Sinshine 28
Don't ever approach hurt animals without safety precautions, especially after such a big accident. They don't understand you're trying to help them and can easily hurt you badly or even kill you. Better report the accident and start in your car until someone to help arrives.