Today, due to the cold, windy weather, I decided to wear my brand-new cute (and expensive) jacket that has a faux-fur hood. As I walked down the street, numerous PETA members attacked me with red liquid. I'm a Vegan and an animal-rights activist. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I went on a date with a great vegan guy in my class. We went to a vegi-restaurant, I dutifully ate all the meatless dishes, but he seemed pissed about something, and other diners kept giving me angry looks. After we left, I realised I'd worn my leather jacket to the date. FML
Today, as I was walking my dog, some self-righteous animal activist berated me on how it was animal abuse to put my dog on a leash. Despite warning her, she crouched down to undo it, my dog charged at her, giving her a gash on the cheek. She kicked my dog for it, and is now threatening to sue me. FML
Today, I realized I've become a stereotypical militant vegan when I told a friend that we should start raising Lone Star ticks and dropping them around town so we could spread meat allergies and force people to eat vegan. FML
Today, I was protesting for animal rights. On my way home, I accidentally hit a pig with my car. I freaked out and got out to check to see if it was OK. It knocked me over, spraining my wrist, and it pissed all over my pants. FML
Today, I was lectured by a self-professed vegan over my "barbaric" eating habits, in between her scarfing down a tuna fish sandwich. FML
Today, my roommate decided to go vegan after watching a PETA video. She began this new-found lifestyle by throwing out all of the non-vegan items in the house, including some prime rib we had recently purchased, all of our ice cream, and my chocolate stash. FML
Today, I bought a jacket with real fur on it. Turns out, i'm allergic and now my ears look like they have herpes on them. FML
Today, my mom called me to the laundry room after she saw a dead animal in there. I took a look and agreed we should call animal control. After ten minutes of freaking out, they finally arrived to confirm that the dead animal was the hood to my winter jacket. FML
Today, I was called ugly and viciously ridiculed by a couple of teenage girls. They were wearing uggs and vests that made them look like a freak-show of bleached pomeranians. FML
Today, my boss was hosting some client representatives for a meeting and had offered to buy everyone lunch. The "healthy" place he's ordering from made me sick last time, so I'd politely opted out. At lunch, the reps glared at me in the meeting room as I ate my homemade chili con carne. Turns out they're all vegans. FML
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Top comments
KeithHarris 0
Serves you right for wearing fake animals. Next time wear the real thing so you'll at least deserve getting pelted with fake animal blood. :-D PETA members are dicks.
michellaneous 0
whats with the red liquids lately? well, PETA is a bit extreme, but they shouldn't be going around bombarding people with red liquids!
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Comments (510)
butteredtoast 0
Hahaha @ #4. PETA is retarded.
hopeinstar 1
Like #7 said fake fur isn't always fake, so wearing fake fur as a animal rights activist and a vegitarian isn't exactly the most rational thing.
kotmfu 5
you deserved if for nothing else then being a douche bag animal rights activist
IndigoFuckYou 9
a) grow a heart. b) dont be a dick. c) keep your opinions against the non-human inhabitants of the planet we all share to yourself.
deathproof_fml 0
PETA is a group of scum.
RyanRaygun 0
I hate PETA. They took away my guns. My guns that shot blanks. AT FAKE ******* HIPPOS. I hope they all get eaten by wolves/bears.
rockintothebeat 0
ahaha the hippo thing made me laugh
zebradude 0
Do u work at Disneyland?
r37s4090Xl7N 0
Now you know what horrible people animal rights activists are. Repent.
TheSmirkster 0
Wearing fake fur and fake leather support the ideal that it is fashionable to wear animal products. Personally I don't care and I think PeTA is the most hypocritical organization I know of, but seriously don't claim animal rights and then wear animal inspired fashion. tsk tsk tsk.
Tehalon 0
Yay for PETA! :D YDI for wearing a stupid jacket like that! Those jackets are for moroccan, turkish and wanna-be gangsterbitches. (Where i'm from anyway and thats all that matters *roar*)
furi7 0
PETA is the biggest bunch of bs ever made and no one could give a damn as to what they have to say because there are bigger things that are wrong with this world and lets fix the treatment of people before we go to fix the treatment of animals, not that they're not important but because animals won't one day blow up this planet with nuclear or biological weapons.
Eresbel 0
I hate PETA. But I don't see the problem with wearing faux-fur. You like the way it looks but you're not contributing to the torture of animals - only the slavery of third world countries. :)