By Anonymous - 21/08/2012 00:46 - United States - Oregon

Today, at football practice, the biggest lineman shouldered me so hard in the groin that my protective cup pushed back with enough force to crack the bone. FML
I agree, your life sucks 29 796
You deserved it 2 131

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Dude, that's why I don't play football. That must have hurt. Hope you are feeling better.

That's one of the ultimate FMLs for a guy.


Dude, that's why I don't play football. That must have hurt. Hope you are feeling better.

I guess you're not groin to play football for a while

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

38 - Whatever it was, and according to his username, he smoked it all.

36, um, I know I'm stating the obvious to most people but... I don't think he attacked the poor guy on purpose.

36 -It's football. OP signed up for this. Man I can't imagine how bad that must feel. I'm one of the smaller lineman on my team, And for 3 hours a day I hit linemen.

angry_anonymous 5

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

I'm pretty sure for football they suggest you WEAR a cup.

Actually the don't. The way the cup sits it chaffs horribly if you do wear one. Also the chances of you getting hit in the nuts are pretty slim because of the way the pants fit. A cup is not suited for a long driving blow such as a shoulder. The cup can slide under the continuous weight and do severe testicular damage. A cup is designed for a quick hard blow with no driving force. Such as a baseball.

103-well said. This is correct because my football coaches at not only my school but the 8 other coaches at the 2 football camps I attended never once suggested wearing a cup. Neither me nor any of my teammates got hit in the nuts while playing over my 4 year career. I only got hit in the nuts once before practice by the team douche bag...

At least you had the cup! Imagine the state you'd be in if you hadn't! Family jewels would be no more!

Geez people, leave him alone already. It was fun reading the comments though!

You're trying way too hard to be funny. Please stop...

wow. if you don't like what I say thumb me down and move on. Who the hell are you to tell me I can't post.

sunnyt 5

13- Welcome to FML. But you should leave.

astralvagan 20

This is FML.... If you get offended by something someone said on here, you are probably on the wrong site.

You're obviously too sensitive to be on here If you can't handle a few thumbs down. Leave.

astralvagan 20

Your profile says you're 17..... No wonder you can't take the "adult" humor.

18, imagine that, people who get on a site to laugh at other people's misfortune are ruthless..

Oh believe me, we're more then happy to thumb you down. Your comment was completely devoid of purpose, you said so yourself.

Today, some 17 year old got offended on FML. FHL

FirebirdF350 7

Dude, your 17, and offended? Actually, the more surprising thing is that you didn't realize we are ruthless, by the way, pictures of hand guns don't look cool when attached to comments such as yours. Especially since you're too young to own one, if you had shown maturity and some commonsense we might have let you slide. Let the thumbs bury you as one day they shall me.

How long have u been on this site for? A lot of people believe that a thumbsdown isnt enough for a few "special" individuals, and go out of their way, an extra mile just so those few "special" individuals get the crystal clear message that they are idiots. You my not so dear friend, are an idiot. Nd btw let your balls drop, even my little 11 year old cousin wouldnt cry over a little arguement over the internet

Mazio- you should go to 4Chan instead. You'll like it there.

Excuse me but I shoot guns everyday. So because I'm not old enough to own a gun I'm not allowed to shoot one? Yeah ok.

I'm an idiot? Really. It sounds to me like you're the idiot if you think you can base my intelligence off of a comment on fml.

Your profile says you live in Vancouver, USA. ...what.

dude. **** you. if I want to defend myself then I ******* will. You people bitch about everything! My comment sure whatever but my picture and my age? I can have a picture of the gun my Grandpa left me when he died of cancer 5 days ago if I ******* please! You intolerable pricks.

coolbrony12 3

Vancouver, USA? as in (most likely) Vancouver, Washington?! Oh great...this idiot lives in my city -.-

I think they already have. Let's just hope he isn't emo and cut himself and blame it all on the "cyberbullying" he received on the Net. ...yep.

FirebirdF350 7

111, I don't understand why your being thumbed down, I agree, cyberbullying is, to me at least, bs, I was physically bullied early in school, and called a satanist because I wasn't christian, and honestly I don't equate any abuse this kid may claim he suffers from our comments to getting a couple right hooks to the temple, or having someone steal your possessions to taunt you, the internet last I checked is a media platform governed by those who use it, if you don't like what's on a site the simplest answer is don't use said site, like my house, if you don't like non christians, smoking, guns, don't pop by for visits. If that kid doesn't like our comments, don't comment, our don't read our replies, the blame is solely on his shoulders

That's one of the ultimate FMLs for a guy.

Yeah, but the guy who ripped his sack open still holds the title.

Or even for a girl! dude he said he cracked the BONE

How the hell does he shoulder you in the groin...

The biggest lineman was actually only 3 feet tall

Does this remind anyone of American Pie with the little football midgets?

astralvagan 20

It's called dropping your shoulder.... Most high school and college players do it.

mal2012 4

How does he shoulder him in the groin? Its football!! They are doing everything. Btw. Sorry OP, def ultimate FML for a guy.

I played football for ten years... And I was always a bit taller... And I still never got shouldered in the groin. What was OP trying to pull an ocho cinco and hurdle a 6 foot tall lineman?

There's a saying that goes along with football "lowest guy wins. Always. No exceptions."

EnigmaThe321 12

Wow OP, well at least now your future kids get to get in the action too! :D

Nah, he'll be safe on that. If he wasn't wearing a cup? Then there'd be an issue.

Baconman345 9

Advantage: 15 yards for unnecessary roughness

That sounds horrific, but at least the cup did its job and your twig and berries are in tact. I'm female, but I'm guessing a cracked pelvis would be better than popped balls.

Or a fractured "smurf like" bruised penis. :o

iXTMAstro 6
MorganBrown 8

Sounds painful and I may be wrong for laughing at your comment but that's hilarious

Actually 58 you can... Yeah I'd be horrified too if I had a dick.

58- If you can break a dick, I'm pretty sure you can fracture one.

I'm wondering the exact same thing too. I'm assuming the bone and not boner. But who knows!

klovemachine 24

I sure hope he didn't have a boner while playing football :O

SpokenReasons 0

there is no bone in the penis you and OP are a dumbass

Well boners can happen at the worst times with all that body stuff going on. Most of the time you can't help get one. Just happen randomly.

Yeah but he's wearing a cup... It wouldn't make a difference......

Ouch,at least you were wearing a protective cup though,it could have been /a lot/ more painful. Hope you feel better soon.