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Add a comment - Reply to : #
If OP's boyfriend is not currently obsessive and has no malicious intent then I don't think the past is much of a problem. I have a feeling that OP's boyfriend didn't truly stalk her, or else the authorities/a restraining order would be involved. I dunno, justI think he deserves a second chance as long as his current behavior is normal.
43, I had a guy who used to follow me home after school a few times (he didn't follow me quite to my house) and gave me love notes, I still consider that stalking but I didn't press charges, we were young and he just had a crush on me that he took a bit far. But if I found out I was dating him (I know his name but if I didn't) I don't know what I'd do because that would make me feel like he was stalking me without me for all these years. However, you're probably right, if he's not showing obsessive behaviour he should get a second chance but that would always be in the back of my mind if it was me.
Obviously he wasn't so creepy. Once his looks changed she was interested. That's all that creeped her out... otherwise she wouldn't date him now. Op is probably vain and the " creepy stalker" is just a normal guy. He should probably get a girlfriend that appreciates him for him...
That's actually pretty creepy... Did you not remember his name from before?
I would think even hearing a similar or same name would trigger memories of the event, assuming she even knew his name to begin with. But if she didn't even know his name chances are he wasn't really stalking her. I would assume stalking victim would at least know the stalkers name, if for no reason other than to report or avoid them. But then again, I've never been stalked...that I know of...
69-All I read is that OP didn't recognize him, not that she finds him any more or less attractive. There is nothing shallow about not recognizing a person-especially a 'stranger'-from the past. I swear some people need to work on their reading comprehension skills.
Also, 65, I wanted you to know that I accidentally thumbed you up instead of down. Your comment also lacked intelligence. Most people meet out of two circumstances-common ground or physical attraction. So while not every relationship is initially based on looks, many are, and the rest are only developed over time from said common ground, whether it's school, work, friendship, etc. So to judge someone for pointing out that physical attraction just makes you seem ignorant.
While I agree with most of you that physical attraction is what most people recognize/look for first, you can like someone off of their personality alone, and I know that with a lot of people the better the personality the better they start to look physically as well.
Not every relationship or crush stems from being physically attracted to someone. I am asexual for instance. I can recognize when a person is good looking but I don't have any feelings passed the person looks good or feel like I want to have sex with that person. On the other hand, a person becomes way more attractive to me because of their personality than how good looking they are.
Score one for stalking! It's news like this that helps me to remember persistence pays off. I'm now convinced the girl I have locked in my basement WILL love me someday. Or else...