Intimacy: Today, along with my virginity, my boyfriend took my laptop,... - FML

By gerligrl97 - 12/06/2011 18:50 - United States

Spicy

Today, along with my virginity, my boyfriend took my laptop, iPhone, TV, and most of the food in my fridge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 098

You deserved it 12 694

Fête de la Musique: Notes et Négligences
When melodies meet misadventures, the Fête de la Musique becomes a symphony of laughter! More…

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Same thing different taste

Gone

By december2009 - 04/01/2010 03:41 - United States

Spicy

Today, I woke up to realize that the guy who took my virginity last night also took my flat screen TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 893

You deserved it 9 970

By ROLLY - 03/03/2010 20:35 - United States

Today, my boyfriend stole a guy's cookie. As revenge, he stole my iPod. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 538

You deserved it 3 919

By Anonymous - 28/10/2010 03:27 - United States

Spicy

Today, I woke up cold. The guy I had sex with last night stole my blanket. He also took everything out of my freezer, and all of my soap, shampoo, and conditioner. The number he left me was for a pizza place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 358

You deserved it 35 051

By Shortround - 30/09/2012 12:56 - United States - Wheaton

Today, I had three things stolen: my phone, my iPod, and my girlfriend. All by the same guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 184

You deserved it 2 911

By faded as shit - 27/09/2011 01:10 - United States

Today, my parents took away my laptop, TV, Xbox, and car all because I broke up with my girlfriend. They said when I patch things up with her, I can have my stuff back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 599

You deserved it 5 357

By Sad - 28/04/2009 22:13 - United States

Today, my house got broken into. My brand new laptop was stolen, along with my flatscreen TV, digital camera, external hard drive and some clothes. Wanting to drown my sorrows in the Ben and Jerry's Phish Food ice cream in the freezer, I opened the door to find that it too had been stolen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 218 429

You deserved it 15 327

Suspicious activity

By Anonymous - 04/04/2015 04:04 - United States - Baltimore

Today, I visited my girlfriend's apartment for the first time. I guess she forgot to do some spring cleaning before I showed up, because I saw my laptop on her couch. The same laptop that was stolen from my house along with several other valuables last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 031

You deserved it 2 909

By Danielle - 06/06/2011 19:00 - United States

Today, I stayed at my boyfriend's house after mine was broken into. The robber took my laptop, jewellery, and tons of clothes. When I walked into his house, I was greeted by his brother, wearing one of my stolen shirts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 795

You deserved it 4 067

By Anonymous - 14/02/2013 20:23 - Germany

Today, my girlfriend bought herself a brand new iPad and iPod Touch, and returned my aging iPod and Kindle, which she constantly steals for her own use. She considers it my Valentine's Day present. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 898

You deserved it 3 825

By Anonymous - 09/11/2013 20:41 - United States

Today, my boyfriend moved out and took all his things with him. He also took some things that didn't belong to him, namely my rent money. My landlord comes tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 180

You deserved it 3 805

Next

Top comments

futtbuck101 1

Sunday 12 June 2011 23:30

you better get that food back

Calyx_fml 21

Sunday 12 June 2011 23:28

Yet you call him your "boyfriend".

Comments

xtremerico 0

Monday 13 June 2011 7:52

what does OP mean?

kialuvsyoo 3

Monday 13 June 2011 21:27

original poster. the one who posted the FML

zembof 3

Monday 13 June 2011 7:54

that's what we guys r hear for **** eat and leave with ur shit

mikeandyf 0

Monday 13 June 2011 8:13

I'm pretty sure stealing someones virginity is known as rape...

Magnimus 4

Monday 13 June 2011 8:26

call the police and tell your parents; but quick. There needs to be evidence of the act for you to have any legal recourse. Also, you're a dumbass for putting yourself in that position, OP.

meggieh815 0

Tuesday 14 June 2011 6:25

also, mostly for the part she is 14 or 15. :/

icemandad66 0

Monday 13 June 2011 8:31

find a good surgeon and pay them to attack him and cut his tackle off!!!

nikki9tails 3

Monday 13 June 2011 8:38

why stand for that, your a pussy.

ReneeFlem_Flam 2

Monday 13 June 2011 8:46

:/ that sucks bless your heart

lauralavenderbab 0

Monday 13 June 2011 9:45

well he's different not in for one thing but in for all of it and you call him ur boyfriend

writergirl23 19

Monday 13 June 2011 10:16

and hoooow did he manage to cart ur tv away without u noticing??? Stay awake sleepyhead.

wsquah 4

Monday 13 June 2011 10:23

let's face it. you'd prob never have finished the food on your own anyway

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Embarrassing Roommate Music Singing TV shows Dogs Animals Relatable Sports Weird Love Cheating AITA Death Awkward Annoying Family Health Doctor Capitalism Money Work Drunk Concert Friends Coworkers Pranks Sextoys Intimacy

The Top

Today, I was caught "experimenting" with my friend at his house. His parents called mine, and my dad came to drive me home. On the way back, he tried to cheer me up by saying, "Son, don't be ashamed. When I was your age, I sucked a few dicks myself." Thanks for the info, Dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 564

You deserved it 27 028

Today, I was playing Wii Sports, trying to finally complete the "pick up spares" bowling game. My parents were behind me and said they would support me. After several failed attempts, I realized they had been on their phones the whole time, and were so engrossed that they didn't even look up when I spoke to them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 135

You deserved it 628

The Top

Today, I was making lunch, when my two-year-old ran up to me and handed me an empty bottle of baby powder. I soon realized I'd be spending the rest of my day cleaning the entire house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 494

You deserved it 4 243

Today, as I was just finishing my grocery shopping, a little girl and her mother walked past. Seeing the little girl staring at me, I waved. The girl then pointed to me and asked her mother "Mommy, is that man pregnant?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 861

You deserved it 7 312

Today, I was eating a hamburger on the street when a pigeon came down to take a bite. I ran and got 30 birds or so chasing me. My legs were burning, half of my burger was gone, and an entire office building was laughing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 723

You deserved it 9 461

Today, I filled out a 'perfect job placement' test, where you put down your skills, experience and education level and then it finds you jobs based on your abilities and areas of knowledge. No lie, the most compatible job they found for me was 'Dishwasher'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 492

You deserved it 6 148

Today, I had some soup that my dad made. I took one sip and found he had put tons of hot sauce in it. I rushed to drink from a soda can sitting on the counter, only to find that my mom had used it as an ash tray the night before. I can still taste the hot sauce, and the ash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 462

You deserved it 3 379

Today, I had to call in sick to work because I was experiencing bowel distress. I called my manager's phone directly so no one else would know of my embarrassment. She put me on speakerphone, and I only realized when the juvenile laughter started. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 435

You deserved it 2 164