Are you experienced?

By ugh - 11/03/2013 11:33 - United States - Easthampton

Today, I was caught "experimenting" with my friend at his house. His parents called mine, and my dad came to drive me home. On the way back, he tried to cheer me up by saying, "Son, don't be ashamed. When I was your age, I sucked a few dicks myself." Thanks for the info, Dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks 56 539
You deserved it 27 018

Same thing different taste

Top comments

At least your dad is trying to be supportive, you should be appreciative.

A bit awkward yeah but to be fair is heart is clearly in the right place and he's trying to be nice.. He could have been a horrible homophobic dick about it!


OhDearBetrayal 25

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vadaaa 11

Sorry, but wouldn't OP still be able to imagine those "situations" if their eye and ears were cut off? It's not like they were born deaf and blind, and don't know what anything looks or sounds like. So they can still imagine it

OhDearBetrayal 25

Tis true, but it's a little difficult to remove your brain.

If anyone tries to give me a lobotomy, I'm gonna give him a piece of my mind!

Well someone clearly removed yours..At least the common sense part of it anyway.

Destroying your eyes and ears would only trap you in a lonely world where you are left with nothing BUT your imagination... The only way to get over it is to move on.

Sucking dicks must've run in the family

At least your dad is trying to be supportive, you should be appreciative.

I say you deserve a cool supporting dad like that

Yeah, so much this. I turned out bisexual. I'm glad I waited until later in life to discover this, because if my dad had found out, he would have beaten the shit out of me, disowned me, and kicked me out of the house.

#152, at least try to prove your point. otherwise don't bring it up.

dorworters 9

homosexuality is NOT hereditary you ignorant prick. If it were, nobody would have a choice in it. And thats the entirety of what it is, a choice.

Feebyy 10

Much worse than 145's punishment? I don't think so...I feel bad for even calling it a punishment. You shouldn't be punished for your sexual orientation. Unless you're being sarcastic of course...

Therapy is pretty bad. They might try and "fix" you.

Thank you, 2, for pointing that out. Most parents get irrational and say/do things that can make the curious person feel awful. OP's dad is incredibly supportive. He probably told his stories to OP so OP wouldn't feel alone or misunderstood.

AleyahRose123 6
xoxokelsey11 5

^seriously, because think about it. it'd be wayyy worse if your dad (or both your parents) were homophobes.

Fishinaddict22 1

Alright alright alright, gonna learn today...

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Fishinaddict22 1

No one knows the reference apparently. It's from a Kevin Hart stand up. When did FML become so damn serious? If any one tries to make a joke anymore they get thumbed down or called insensitive. People come here to laugh, this isn't a therapy forum.

Bubbelz 25

Agreed. But... Are you sure abiut your last remark?

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Fishinaddict22 1

It wasn't meant as harmful or helpful. I wasn't insinuating he needs to "learn" (gay isn't something you learn). If you knew the reference then you wouldn't say it has nothing to do with the comment. It's the exact same situation, he found out his dad oral pleasured another man. The "original" comments have become nothing more than bad puns. I wasn't trying to be original, if I could then I would be a writer and not posting on FML. I apologize for the comment coming off wrong, don't want this becoming a discussion.

I thought the comment was original as not many people quote comedians. Also, it pertained to the FML so it wasn't random or "a wasted comment". And it made me laugh which is why I come to this site, not to read about commenters trying to play therapist with random people's problems. So even as a small part of the FML community, don't speak for me cause I like the comment.

MrsKitty 8

I thought it was funny, I got the reference and I believe it was appropriate. OP was trying to learn, got caught and then unfortunately learned about some information he didn't want to know. alright alright alright!

Fishinaddict, I want you to know that I legit created an acct just to be able to say that I thiught it was funny as heck to use the Kevin hart reference. It has everything to do with the fml because Kevin jokes about his uncle sucking dick for money and then his dad comes in sayin alright alight alrightttt. Don't listen to these haters, your joke was accurate and funny

little_sailor 8

K's Uncle: "Oh lord it shoulda been me! I was the one sucking dick for money!" K's Grandma: "Suckin dick?! Oh!" *grandma fake faints* Kevin: "Somebody get grandma's lyin ass up out the church!"

You obviously have no idea about what the FML community dislikes seeing as it's thumbed up and yours is thumbed down. Get a ******* sense of humor.

cukeeper1 12

Uhuh no the f*ck im not! Your gonna keep that lesson to yourself.

A bit awkward yeah but to be fair is heart is clearly in the right place and he's trying to be nice.. He could have been a horrible homophobic dick about it!

Yes, he could have been terrified of gay people and been a dick. Homophobic does not mean unaccepting

Hehe homophobic dick... Get it? It's not really a pun, but it made me giggle.

IGaveRickUp 15

Um, so homosexuals are supposed to be grateful for acceptance. Wow thanks, YOU'RE LETTING ME EXIST.

There are tons of kids out there who wish they had your dad!

Umm he said "kids". Unless you consider yourself a 29 year old kid.

lukep135 6

What kid wants a dad that has sucked dick???? They aren't even comfortable knowing that they have sex with their mom

I wish I could like this 1000 times

108: I dunno about you, but my parents are virgins and I was delivered by a stork.

Or bisexual? Or I dunno, just experimenting a lot more people than you'd like to think do?

7 - My brother's gay and he's experimented with women before....does that make him straight by that logic? ;p

Sometimes it takes people years to figure out who they are. Some even go through stages of denial.

Or perhaps trying to fit into social norms before he discovered his sexuality.

Oh look, 7 edited his comment. Ignorant idiots or ignorant idiots who don't even have the balls to stand by their beliefs... I'm not sure which is worse.

kishorekumar_a 10

51 - Well, that cleares that up. I was wondering why the replies don't match up with the post. Besides finding out your sexual orientation, there are also possibilities of change in sexual orientation.

65: Fun fact: Sexual orientations are made up* (*socially constructed). People aren't really "straight" or "gay" or "bi", we just categorize them that way based on what they seem to like to do. This is the reason why some people seem so hard to categorize--the categories are actually bullshit.

Oh and here I thought we were all *born* with our labels. Facepalm! /sarcasm

categories/ labels aren't complete bullshit. they're only really bullshit when they're 1. misused 2. given to a person by a different person 3. used as an insult, or 4. used to section off certain groups for discrimination. But they can help people find groups of other people with common thoughts, interest, problems and concerns, to help deal with together and let people know they're not alone.

mimiminx 23

Your dad was probably trying to let you know he was ok with it all. Be grateful you have such an open minded father.

I agree. And it can't be easy for a dad to come pick up his son found 'experimenting' by someone else's parents

That visual, among other things, must have been tough to swallow....

This is how I see it -Dad receiving call: alright I'm cumming Thinking to himself- ok how do I say this without being a dick about it it would really suck if he started growing away from me, maybe ill sympathize say I've done the same

Either way he seems pretty cool and accepts you! Not many parents are accepting right away.

debbster7 18

It could have been worse. Your dad could've shown you pictures of those experimenting days... Smh

why would he have pictures? and please don't say "omg it was just a joke" because it was a godawful joke