Wow. Your friends are douches. Sorry OP. FYL.

My bullshit radar is going off. If OP is handcuffed to the bed (I'm assuming both hands but could be wrong), how did they make this FML?

All OP's friends have to do is give him a handsaw and give him the decision to stay handcuffed or lose a limb...

33- U wot m8

33 - is that a Mad Max reference or Saw? :O

Think it's a walking dead.

If it was Saw then it would be something like hancuffed in a room full of oil where you have a choise of losing a limb or getting burned alive as your timer is a candle.

I'm JUST saying, but what if Op was a girl. Nobody would find this funny and cops would be involved. Equal rights....someday.

I do believe #33 is referencing the original Saw movie. Where the protagonists were chained to pipes in a bathroom with 2 saws.

44/61- yeah I was referencing the original Saw movie

Best friends are like enemies except treat you a hell of a lot worse.

if your FML starts with 'after a night of heavy drinking', you know nobody's going to have sympathy for you.

Have you never had a night of heavy drinking?

We all have at some point, but the unwritten rule is that you are still responsible for whatever happens after a night of heavy drinking.

well one time i drank a whole gallon of tap water at one sitting, and there's supposedly alot of lead in it right? would that be considered heavy drinking? i never woke up chained to a bed though.

My thoughts exactly #3

Ofcourse I have, 25. I was just stating how the FML community works.

Yeah, this is one of the first FML's that start with that, that hasn't been a YDI.
What's this guys secret get-out-of-jail (or handcuffs) secret?

Lol 29

Handcuffs operate on a ratchet system generally. All you need is a thin shim and some time to get out of one.

I cant sympathize for someone who puts the resposibility of his or her actions onto someone else when he or she drinks. Just because you drink too much doesnt mean its everyone elses fault that you end up in a certain way. Control yourself.

It's the Hangover part 3

behind the scenes !!

at least theres not a tiger in the bathroom

Well at least you're not handcuffed and naked. That'd be worse.

Ah the benefits of heavy drinking.

Well then Houdini? How did you escape and type up this FML?

You don't want to know what appendage he used to type this.

there's no spelling mistakes though. he must have a dick that resembles the width of a pencil.

so from logical reasoning:

waking up handcuffed to a bed but somehow writing an FML means OP has a small penis.

FLAWLESS!

To quote the waterboy " needledick "

@31 then he turned into a girl according to 52

So how did you type this FML?

and you're writing this with you hands being handcuffed?

Well at least we know you didn't wander off and get in trouble!