By Wolf145 - 11/10/2012 05:28 - United States - San Francisco

Today, a haunted house opened up next to my restaurant and they've gotten into the habit of scaring me as I'm cleaning up at night. They stay open for another month. FML
I agree, your life sucks 24 844
You deserved it 2 214

Same thing different taste

Top comments

I personally find that awesome! People pay good money for a good scare and you're getting it for free! If it is at all possible, maybe you can get them back(you may as well make the best of it)?

make them pasta on the house. use lots and lots of xlax. lock your bathrooms :)


It can't be that scary if u get used to it.

It's easier said than done, although not impossible. If they do it because they find it funny, then fake a cardiac arrest and see who's laughing then.

I'm going to ask something, so feel free to thumb me down as I seem to be the only one questioning this. so I guess none of you guys see the problem with this fml. Anyway- why is there randomly a haunted house 'opening' next to a restaurant? Has nobody else questioned this? A haunted house is opening. Aren't houses supposed to be just rumoured to be haunted? Just nobody seems bothered by the fact that it's a haunted house which is impossible. And who are 'they'? Ghosts? No. Please explain, someone. I'm really confused.

CheshireHalli 19

Usually there are attractions that open up in October to celebrate Halloween and they charge for their scares. They are known as haunted houses and the "they" refers to the workers.

Oh I see. Well I've never heard of that, only ever seen something remotely similar at the shows that come to town every year. They have funhouses. In England we don't take halloween as seriously as they do across the pond. Excuse my ignorance.

#86 In that case the other side of the pond, is more fun then. Although I'm sure England has some cool things that us Americans' do not. Like castles! Speaking of haunted house, that would be cool a haunted castle. Though I'm sure in the Romina Vlad The Impaler's castle would be cool to go into. That is it wasn't destroyed by the war(s).

95- I'm pretty certain it's still there. Vlad Dracula was excellent because he just did not give a shit.

CheshireHalli 19

86 - That's perfectly fine. Not everybody knows everything about the way thing are celebrated in other countries. I'm just glad I was able to help.

I personally find that awesome! People pay good money for a good scare and you're getting it for free! If it is at all possible, maybe you can get them back(you may as well make the best of it)?

Some people aren't into that. Personally, I find it stupid and would get pretty pissed if it were me.

abbyabb 4

This is a good way to attract more customers.

Hiimhaileypotter 52

Wow, you suck haha. /copying him

3, if it sucks so much, then why are you here?

You two above me are WAY too nice. Here, let me try: If you don't ******* like it here, **** the **** off before the mods shove a banhammer up your already dilated asshole, asshole. There. Much better.

Just walk around with a baseball bat, no one will dare scare you ;)

Naaaa Either a whole fish or pepper spray.

A baseball bat? I would just always make sure I had a bucket of ice water near me.

Get a paintball gun and practice up for the Zombie Apocalypse.

foreverboredZ 4

That would be perfect for a baseball themed resturant!

Just give them free food. That'll stop em.

Sure, let's all just start giving away the product we use to make money. That should solve all our problems... if somebody gave you free food on the regular, woul you leave them alone or come back every night?

#75, Hot coffee or chocolate for a small staff wouldn't cost much. Possible cross-marketing opportunity?

I don't see how your brilliant business plan is going to help OP's problem.

Next time they do that have a bat ready, then beat the crap outta them and say that you thought it was an intruder. Or you can plan something scary to do back to them. Either way, i guarantee that they would stop.

BellaBelle_fml 23

Violence is never the answer, it's the question. Yes is the answer.

Yeah, being charged with assault always makes me forget about my problems.

iarefatal 9

Step one: assault Step two: get charged with multiple accounts of assault Step three: go to jail Step four: become a hardened convict Step five: escape Step six: while still in orange uniform go to their house, and say it's been a long time... Then you will have the final scare! But you'll probaly go back to jail so... Repeat the posses.

make them pasta on the house. use lots and lots of xlax. lock your bathrooms :)

Psych101 9

"Sorry, restrooms are for customers only. Can I interest you in more pasta?

You call yourself wolf so act like one and turn the situation around. I don't mean to bite them, but wolves can be scary too. You know when they do it so lay in wait and scare the shit out of them. The opportunities are endless here. Have fun with it.

truckdriver321 3

48- I think you meant to say "Hey bro good idea!"

No i think the best way would be to get a machine gun,some grenades,, and maybe a bazooka or two, and killeveryone there. Does that sound like a good idea???

trellz17 19

Find a way to scare them back.

UncleMuscles 5

Dress up like Slenderman and stand by their cars.

I thought you only had to worry about Slenderman if you were under the age of 10? I recently looked up Slenderman to see what everyone was talking about. I must be missing some information. I still don't understand what the scare is all about. :P

play the game, it's creepy walking around having just a torch and then BAM he's there and you freeze... I was actually too chicken to get through the first mission :(

I'm with you Enslaved. The 20 Dollar Mod makes it funny as hell though.

The real scare of slender man is from watching the all of the videos from the YouTube channel, MarbleHornets. That's how it started to scare me.