Today, I was at my friend's dorm eating supper. He and all his roommates are Chinese, and since I'm majoring in Chinese, I could understand what they were talking about. Too bad none of his friends knew that, and talked about banging me while I was sitting there. FML
Collection
College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, I was eating at a Chinese restaurant, when I stopped the waitress to tell her that even though I am of Chinese heritage, I can't understand a word of Chinese. After an awkward silence, she told me she was actually speaking English. FML
Today, at a tutoring center, one of the tutors looked at my worksheet and laughed. She then showed all the other tutors my mistakes and they laughed along with her. The best part? They all speak Chinese and they think I can't understand them. I'm Chinese. FML
Today, I got a new roommate. He's from Mongolia. He has had 5 friends over for the last 7 hours, all speaking Mongolian. This is the most awkward party I have ever been to. FML
Today, I met new people at my dorm, only to find they already knew me because they listen to my boyfriend and me have sex all the time. FML
Today, my friend invited me, his girlfriend, and the girl I like over to his house to hang out. We hoped it would get me closer to my crush. The day ended with them having a threesome and me locked out. FML
Today, I spent all day preparing a big, elaborate Italian dinner for my boyfriend, who recently discovered he was part Italian. He came home, turned up his nose and said "I was in the mood for Chinese". FML
Today, I introduced my Chinese-born girlfriend to the rest of the family. My uncle immediately blurted out, "He's dating a communist." FML
Today, I had dinner at my girlfriend's house with her parents. Everything was going great, until after dinner when her dad pulled me aside and told me he'd heard us having sex. I was out of town all weekend for a baseball tournament. FML
Today, I was talking to my best friend about a cute guy that girls are afraid to even speak to, so I then decided to march right up to him and say hello. When he smiled at me, I stood there with my mouth wide open, but I made non-coherent words. He asked me if I was a foreign exchange student. FML
Today, I got talking to a really hot guy at a party. He told me that he was only here because he heard the host would sleep with anyone, and he and his buddies had a bet going. It was my party. FML
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Top comments
xoxcinderellaxox 0
i would have surprised them by speaking to them in chinese and tell them an awesome comeback to shut them up then walked right out.
cocky 0
You should've responded in Chinese by saying, "Too bad I wouldn't feel your tiny Asian dicks!" Buhahahaha.
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Comments (120)
DynamicDave 11
#10 = ownage! Also, his username fits that comment perfectly!
1goodthing 0
ok I guess 14 is a personal record... and OP i dnt know if thats much of an FML, seems like u can mess with them, provided this is not a fake of course
RagePX 0
ydi cause ure a hot shiznit and i would join the fun :D haha
xoxcinderellaxox 0
i would have surprised them by speaking to them in chinese and tell them an awesome comeback to shut them up then walked right out.
jchansfan 0
LOL That's great! :P Sorry you had to go through such an awkward scenario though... =(
teddyddet 3
You said "eatins supper" and you're not Chinese ? gotta be kidding
Njtorres 0
and I bet you could handle all of them ,you wouldn't feel a thing oh wait Asians don't shave ewww now I understand your pain!!!
sexycharm1992 0
hahaha!!!!
Chr0nicdreamz 0
rofl #10 pwnage
Lythiaren 8
This is one of those situations where, at a random point in the conversation, you respond to one of their remarks. In Chinese. Then watch the awkward silence descend as they realize that you can understand what they've been saying the while time. They'll never do it again. :D