Today, my boyfriend told me that he could predict my periods because he keeps track of when I'm at my bitchiest each month. This wouldn't be so bad if he wasn't so accurate. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend asked me to start using a period tracker app so I can tell him which week of each month he needs to "stay the hell away" from me. FML
Today, my boyfriend is threatening to dump me if I don’t give him all the details of my menstruation so he can track my periods with an app on his phone. FML
Today, my boyfriend caught me in a lie about being on my period. He memorized my menstrual cycle, but still forgot that today is my birthday. FML
Today, my boyfriend flipped out when he saw a period tracker app on my phone. According to him, chicks only use those when they want to know when they’re the most fertile so they can “baby trap” a man. I have irregular cycles. The app helps me know when I should or shouldn’t expect a period. FML
Today, I was showing the guy I like something on my phone. My period tracking app decided it was the perfect time to tell me that I need to stock up on tampons, because I'm getting my period tomorrow. FML
Today, my boyfriend clearly stated that I was "useless" when on my period. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were talking about being super heroes. He said I could be "The Period" because I'm a bitch. FML
Today, I noticed that on the calendar in my boyfriend’s apartment, for every week of the months when I have my period are coloured in red and over them, in block capitals, he has written 'BEWARE'. FML
Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend after a fight. I told him the reason I was so irritable is because I'm on my period. He yelped in disgust and nearly fell out of bed. Good to know I'm dating a man-child. FML
Today, while I was at my boyfriend's house, I got my period. About an hour after I told him, he impatiently said, "Is it over yet?" FML
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Top comments
TCRII 30
Yep. I called it hell week in my first marriage.
Dale Gulley 8
If you’re an adult, control yourself. Or isolate yourself more during your hell week, bitch period.
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Comments (8)
TCRII 30
Yep. I called it hell week in my first marriage.
mariepastyglue 30
And that's why you're headed towards your 2nd and probably more after!
sickerthanyou 13
Well, then it’s a FHL
Dale Gulley 8
If you’re an adult, control yourself. Or isolate yourself more during your hell week, bitch period.
raven_of_azarath 35
Chances are, the bitchiness is just unnecessary snapping. By what you say, an adult should never snap at someone because their hungry or tired or hurt. It’s not always easy to control small outbursts like that.
cacheson 42
It only took me a few years after my first period to figure out which emotions were hormone fueled and manage them. Women fall back on the hormone excuse but regardless it’s not okay to abuse the people around you.
spinspinsugar 12
my husband does the same thing lol
Anna_Lu_Minum 9
You have more testosterone during them. So you’re more emotional cause you’re being like a dude more.
DeChelle Monique 4
Lol sounds like my fiancé. He can detect mines as well. His reasoning why it’s the week that he has to satisfy himself. 😂😂 lol if I’m late he’s like wait I thought your period was this week.
peterblackmer91 12
I'm missing the problem here.