Miscellaneous and Poopoo peepee: Drained

Drained

By Anonymous - 10/02/2017 08:00 - United States - Washington

Today, while using the restroom at my favorite cafe, I fell asleep for 30 minutes. There is nothing more jarring than waking up to the banging of 7 angry, urine-filled patrons viciously breaking down the only barrier between between you and your shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 231

You deserved it 2 499

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Same thing different taste

Lucid

By Man Shamed - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff - United States - Hyattsville

Today, while using the bathroom in a small coffee shop, I somehow passed out sitting on the toilet. There is nothing more jarring than waking up to the vicious banging of 7 angry, urine-filled patrons attempting to break down a door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 705

You deserved it 1 258

Don't let things get you down, just pish yersel

By Anonymous - 19/07/2023 22:00

Today, I, a grown man in his 30’s, fell asleep and pissed myself like a 2 year-old at bedtime. I was at work on my dinner break and had taken a nap on the break room sofa, which is now soaked in my pee, and I have no change of clothes. Twenty coworkers and 5 senior management all know it was me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 890

You deserved it 321

We could be heroes

By OhPleaseNo - 07/04/2020 14:00 - OhPleaseNo

Today, I was at work at my local hospital. I went to the toilet to empty my bladder; the door was half open so I assumed it was empty. Upon opening the door, I was greeted with a half naked old man, who then yelled at me and violently shat himself, all over the walls and floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 711

You deserved it 204

By pissingcontest - 30/05/2009 00:10 - United States

Today, I had to take a serious piss. I started urinating and leaned back slightly on my heels. Somehow I lost my balance and fell backward, hitting my head on the wall behind me and spraying myself and my entire bathroom with my own pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 650

You deserved it 46 030

Gush gashed

By Anonymous - 29/06/2024 06:00 - United States - Tallahassee

Today, I was using a public restroom when the automatic toilet flushed prematurely. The sudden gush of water startled me so much that I jumped up and slipped, hitting my head on the stall door. A concerned stranger had to help me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 393

You deserved it 125

By Zahkrii - 26/12/2018 16:00

Today, while returning from a class, I stopped to use the bathroom. While in said bathroom, someone threw a chip bag filled with piss water into the stall I was using. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 773

You deserved it 345

By feelinnauseous - 24/06/2009 16:48 - United States

Today, I went to a new bar downtown with some friends. I was a little buzzed and had to pee so bad. I rushed into the bathroom and as I sat down I felt a squish on my upper thigh. Turns out the last person in the stall decided to take a shit on the toilet seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 992

You deserved it 15 729

By eggnoodles - 13/12/2009 05:44 - United States

Today, I woke up to find myself drenched in piss after a long night of drinking. I immediately sprang into action, tossing my bedding in the washer and hopping into the shower. Running late for work, I threw on a nice dress and got into my car. Guess who also peed in the drivers seat? FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 007

You deserved it 53 188

By JustADream - 24/02/2011 06:29 - United States

Today, I woke up and went to the bathroom and took a massive piss. Then I actually woke up, well and truly soaked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 576

You deserved it 9 471

Oh, hello there, don't mind me

By downinthedumps - 13/01/2015 02:47 - United States - Detroit

Today, I went to take a piss in a public bathroom. Somehow, I managed to completely jam the lock. After minutes of trying to get myself out, I gave up and crawled under the stall, at which point someone walked in and was very surprised to see me on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 997

You deserved it 3 341

OhPuhleeze 23

Friday 10 February 2017 14:21

fell asleep is NOT the same as blacked out, as in your last post.

RichardPencil 30

Friday 10 February 2017 16:04

A few days ago you passed out on the coffee shop toilet and today you fell asleep? Just get a Keurig machine for home and make your own goddam coffee!

Comments

OhPuhleeze 23

Friday 10 February 2017 14:21

fell asleep is NOT the same as blacked out, as in your last post.

heyLaddieHey 18

Friday 10 February 2017 16:41

I was wondering if OP was narcoleptic or something, but that makes sense too.

littlebigfish 1

Friday 10 February 2017 14:52

Bullshit.

RichardPencil 30

Friday 10 February 2017 16:04

A few days ago you passed out on the coffee shop toilet and today you fell asleep? Just get a Keurig machine for home and make your own goddam coffee!

Sagely 19

Friday 10 February 2017 18:24

I didn't know a post could be taken back, edited and then reposted again. I saw this one yesterday and it said you passed out. Mandela effect? However it does make more sense. If you were passed out you wouldn't be making noise and people may think the bathroom is empty but locked, but if you're asleep and snoring then I can see why an angry line formed. Either way maybe you stick to coffee at home.