Today, I picked up a hitchhiker. He was well dressed, and seemed trustworthy. As soon as he got in, he pulled out a gun and stole my wallet and car. All of this occurred in front of a sign warning against picking up hitchhikers. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, a total stranger asked me to marry him while we were waiting for the bus. I turned him down. He then pulled a knife on me, grabbed my purse and ran. FML
Today, a stranger pulled me out of the path of a speeding taxicab. He then took one look at my face, said, "I should've left you there", and walked away. FML
Today, I was riding on my bike when I saw a homeless guy holding a sign saying, "Need money, stranded from Oklahoma." I decided to be nice, and hopped off my bike to give him $2. He took the money, and then jacked my bike. FML
Today, I was carjacked. As he shoved me away from my car, I got hit by another car. He and the other car both drove off. FML
Today, I felt a tug on my backpack and found my wallet missing. A nice stranger pointed to a guy running down the stairs and said "There goes the guy who took your wallet!" I ran to catch the supposed offender. The 'nice' stranger was the actual offender distracting me as he got away. FML
Today, a man tried to mug me. I actually apologized to him for not having my wallet on me. FML
Today, I was on my bike. As I'm rolling through an intersection, some asshat in a pickup runs the red light and hits me. Instead of getting out and helping me, the guy hops out, takes a look at me lying in the street, steals my hat and drives off. That was my favorite hat. FML
Today, I after getting off the bus, I realized that the man I was talking to was distracting me so his "buddy" could steal my wallet. FML
Today, I stopped by the gun store to pick up a new concealed weapon for protection. As I was leaving the store, a man came up behind me, hit me with a crowbar, and stole my gun. FML
Today, I was on a bus and a man was feeling up my butt. I was just about to step on his foot when the bus stopped and he slipped out. Only then did I realize he'd stolen my wallet. FML
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Top comments
crazyj12006 3
Kinda deserve that bro.
_streets_ 19
Whenever I drive by a hitchhiker, not helping them makes me feel guilty. But at the same time, you never know who they are or what they could do.
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Comments (239)
LennyComa 39
What did you learn...
sikmunkee 9
irony
Okayitwasme 0
Carry mace! It's quite popular. Burn his eye balls out so he can't drive!
RedPillSucks 33
He can still shoot. At close range you don't need to see well to hit the target.
desireev 18
I've only ever picked up one hitchhiker. The only bad thing that happened was she wanted me to hang out with her and drive her around to all of her druggie friends house. I learned my lesson! Lol
McDonaldsworker 4
Iv only given one homeless person a ride in my life too, it was on new years day & I though I would try to be nice so I stoped & asked where he wanted to go & I kid you not he wanted to go to McDs to get $1.09 coffee lol
ladyLALAA 29
At least you would have known the way!!
DocBastard 40
Just so I understand this correctly, you did something A) illegal in your state and B) incredibly stupid, and you ended up paying for it. Do I have that about right? I can't see any way that you didn't fully deserve this.
TheDrifter 24
Exactly. It's a little different up here in the great white north though. Everything is so far apart that you look at their luggage. Big bags= long distance traveller, no bags = let the townies give them a ride when they see their buddy hitching.
thiscrazything 1
What? It's illegal to pick up a hitchhiker? Really? One more law our government gives is to protect us from our own stupidity. Good thing we live in a free country. (sarcasm)
chippedipp 0
What do you want your name to mean, You Deserved It, you fag. Or maybe, You Deserved It-fag?
rubberduckie94 13
Only pick up members of the rainbow family!!!!! Just ask the what does everyone have and what is everyone greeted with when they show up at a gathering. Oh wait I can't tell you unless there are any baddies out there. Anyway I feel bad when I pass hitchers , but what can you do
I_Punch_Babies 7
everytime i see a hitchhiker i try to run them over.
IdfkMyUsernamexC 5
57 - Interesting username...
I_Punch_Babies 7
i know and for some strange reason i still have no kids! lol
oneuppitynegress 0
Cause we all know they posted that sign for ***** & giggles...
sommerfly9 0
Ummm... Really dude?!?