Today, I picked up a hitchhiker. He was well dressed, and seemed trustworthy. As soon as he got in, he pulled out a gun and stole my wallet and car. All of this occurred in front of a sign warning against picking up hitchhikers. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, a total stranger asked me to marry him while we were waiting for the bus. I turned him down. He then pulled a knife on me, grabbed my purse and ran. FML
Today, a stranger pulled me out of the path of a speeding taxicab. He then took one look at my face, said, "I should've left you there", and walked away. FML
Today, I was riding on my bike when I saw a homeless guy holding a sign saying, "Need money, stranded from Oklahoma." I decided to be nice, and hopped off my bike to give him $2. He took the money, and then jacked my bike. FML
Today, I was carjacked. As he shoved me away from my car, I got hit by another car. He and the other car both drove off. FML
Today, I felt a tug on my backpack and found my wallet missing. A nice stranger pointed to a guy running down the stairs and said "There goes the guy who took your wallet!" I ran to catch the supposed offender. The 'nice' stranger was the actual offender distracting me as he got away. FML
Today, a man tried to mug me. I actually apologized to him for not having my wallet on me. FML
Today, I was on my bike. As I'm rolling through an intersection, some asshat in a pickup runs the red light and hits me. Instead of getting out and helping me, the guy hops out, takes a look at me lying in the street, steals my hat and drives off. That was my favorite hat. FML
Today, I after getting off the bus, I realized that the man I was talking to was distracting me so his "buddy" could steal my wallet. FML
Today, I stopped by the gun store to pick up a new concealed weapon for protection. As I was leaving the store, a man came up behind me, hit me with a crowbar, and stole my gun. FML
Today, I was on a bus and a man was feeling up my butt. I was just about to step on his foot when the bus stopped and he slipped out. Only then did I realize he'd stolen my wallet. FML
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Top comments
crazyj12006 3
Kinda deserve that bro.
_streets_ 19
Whenever I drive by a hitchhiker, not helping them makes me feel guilty. But at the same time, you never know who they are or what they could do.
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Comments (239)
crazyj12006 3
Kinda deserve that bro.
Tektite 14
Bet you'll never do that again..
nahgemoohc 17
Yeah. If a sign on a gate said 'beware of dog', would you still have opened the gate?
Tektite 14
Yeah... No... Lol
lololog 0
Always take you handgun in car trips. Rookie mistake.
_Oblivion_ 12
People dress like that for that reason dumbass. Would you pick up a guy that has his gun showing and isnt looking too nice?
fml_ydi79 15
Did no one notice OP tried to do a nice thing? That at least should be acknowledged. Not saying it was a smart choice but shows OP has a heart.
Nosrebor 8
Yeah, I agree they were trying to be nice, but there is a difference between being nice and being just plain foolish. Don't judge a book by it's cover.
Kyzahhh 7
Obviously OP doesn't watch horror films much you NEVER pick up a hitch hiker... Unless it's pouring rain, you drive 3 miles feel guilty and turn around
ColdplaySucks 18
This is like giving money to a homeless person who's a blatant alcoholic. You're an idiot, OP.
urdirtyolduncle 15
Why didn't he take your cell phone, too?
WaSiSimiLang 8
In the current ******* messed up world, no good deeds goes unpunished...
iluvhobos 5
This isn't the 70's. We don't do that anymore.
cameron194 9
84, your kidding right.. he took his phone so he wouldn't report wat just happened dumbass.. think before hitting that send button bro
GhostDuck 30
... He asked why DIDN'T he steal op's phone. It clearly states in the FML that the hitch hiker did NOT steal his phone.
soccerguy2 11
now we cant assume maybe the hitchhiker just took it too get it pimped out for op and is going to give it back. we don't what his motives were. he might bring it back tomorrow with it being worth a lot of money.
SomeBossOnHere 5
YOU'RE kidding right? You don't know the difference between your and you're?
Keyman1212 14
I don't know about Californian law, but in Texas, when there is a road sign like that, it's there because it's right next to a prison. You're lucky that guy didn't just car jack you or kill you.
Itinerant 3
Eh, it's not nearly as dangerous as people think. Problems are rare, the real problem is that you only hear about the times when things go wrong, unless you actually hitch or frequently host couchsurfers. I feel bad for the OP, though. It really stinks that you got one of the few bad apples. Source: 20,000 miles hitched, over 200 rides, 39 states, and 2 countries. As a well dressed hitchhiker ;)
construction 7
It's 152! He did it! ^ PROOF ^
TheiMightyKhaL 2
As Red Forman would say, Dumbass!
_streets_ 19
Whenever I drive by a hitchhiker, not helping them makes me feel guilty. But at the same time, you never know who they are or what they could do.
eyeIoveyou 4
whenever my parents drive by them, I do feel bad. but, i've watched one too many horror movies to make that mistake :3
ImaginaryFoe 1
I drove by one in the rain once and I felt awful. I circled back and tossed him my umbrella. Sorry truth is there are too many baddies in the world for me to risk my life just to shorten your walk. OP, you should've known better. You are very lucky you didn't lose anything irreplaceable and weren't injured.
shannonreneee 11
Even if they are good people, it's so dangerous for them to be hitchhiking!
murdersquirrel 15
A woman once came up to me when I was still in my car and had just gotten home from work asking for a ride. She had 2 blocks to go but told me she had blisters on her feet. I didn't do it, too risky. Total stranger at night in the city asking for a ride 2 blocks away? Not gonna do it.
drawmesunshine 17
I gave a woman a ride one time. It was only a few miles, and she rode in the back of my truck because I'm untrusting. She was very nice.
stellasue11 38
i learned not to pick them up when my step dad picked up a lady in detroit.... she told us it was 40$ an hour lol she was a hooker!!
deviable 9
The respectable looking ones are always the sneakiest.
mom2pen 4
It's true, most shoplifters are well dressed too.
xiaoxaio 5
at first i thought it said i picked up hitler
Jakesterk96 8
Thank god he didn't take you're phone so you could post this FML.
abbytequiere 9
Exactly. The main reason why OP deserves this is because it's clear there's something going on here. Normally, hitchhikers aren't 'well dressed'.
cr4ckb0n3f4n 0
Dont pick up well dressed hitch hikers.
yahoowizard 16
Pick up the poorer ones, since you know they can't afford a gun
McDonaldsworker 4
Don't worry about me 'cause i only pick up the ones that are filthy and stink:)
purpleamandapand 6
Let's hope OP was poorly dressed then, because (s)he will have to hitchhike now too.
McDonaldsworker 4
Silly OP see why they make the bad hitchhikers carry around those signs now?
desireev 18
This just made me LOL!
RadikulRam 16
#6 McDonaldsworker, you really are a McDonaldsworker aren't you?
cameron194 9
nah, he works a burger king xD ^^
wanna_bee 8
Why are people voting badly for this comment. It is humorous...wait isn't that a bone? Hmm. :)
bbedlock_fml 7
He was well dressed because he already stole 3 cars today!
geon_olam 17
he must be running a smooth operation if he can steal cars, sell them, and go to the mall all in a few hours
heyitsdiamond 5
I think that it should have occured to op that if he was well dress shouldn't he have a car of his own
itsgen 16
Never assume you can trust hitchhikers /: good thing he didn't shoot you, hope you learned your lesson..
McDonaldsworker 4
Good advice just remember to not trust ANY strangers EVER & pray to god it wasn't just a toy water gun that he just robbed you with, (that really happened to me once, in Chicago)
Hague0525 0
Hiii that's cool
perdix 31
I thought after the financial crisis of 2008, everyone would know that well-dressed =/= trustworthy. The biggest crooks had the best suits!
YukiRei 0
Why yes. They are called Lawyers.
gopieman 5
or obama steling our gasoline yeah anerica
hellokittay 5
Ydi. That obviously happens often in that area, if it got so bad the town had to put a sign up.
MaxG123 8
Desperate times...
Torva_fml 16
Call for terrible comments! I mean.... Desperate measures.