And I will be the first person to suggest that maybe he misheard the word punish for punch. They are pretty close and the FML still makes sense.

He obviously isn't into that.

"I'm going to punish you straight in the face." hmmm. Might be a bit of a stretch.

I don't know, porn now a days with these so called "facials"? It really doesn't seem too far of a stretch. I get freaked out whenever I have these Mary Kay reps trying to get me to buy their make-up by offering me a free home facial-- I get way too many dirty thoughts. :P

But it's free! How about a pedi for those toes?

Hmmm I think it's a nice gesture to OP!

I know, SHE was being so rude!

Sounds like my boyfriend OP... I would've started laughing. Not quite an FML I'm sure he is joking.

Why does this have so many bad votes???

Sounds like him

chris brown is a modern day ike turner history never repeats? yeah right!

Who the hell is Ike Turner.

#63 - Who the hell are You?

People should google the tumblr post "celebrities (other than Chris brown) who have committed violence against women" and consider why he and Ike turner are literally the only ones we associate w/ beating women and all these others' violent episodes are overlooked and or forgiven... Food for thought. P.s. I seriously dislike Brown myself, but I disagree with the nonsense of letting these other guys get away with violence and not Chris.

88, Are you Chris Brown?

The best comment for the FML. NO DOUBT. IM DYING

said the husband who beat his wife

i have a food fetish

What kind of kinky shit are you in to?

... Anal fisting and face slapping, obviously