Love: Ouch! - FML

Ouch!

By P0wned - 29/09/2009 21:21 - France

Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend, who had just been awoken by her own fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 961

You deserved it 5 269

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Same thing different taste

By SkinsCastSelection - 17/01/2011 09:53 - France

Today, in the middle of the night, my girlfriend whispered "Are you asleep?" I chose not to respond, to see what she'd do. She then let rip a loud, stinking fart, giggled, and went back to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 104

You deserved it 41 479

By pikachu - 20/01/2009 20:00 - United States

Today, my girlfriend farted in her sleep, woke me up because it was so damn loud, and my room smelt like rotten noodles for about an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 566

You deserved it 4 531

By nosleep - 05/02/2011 00:05 - Australia

Today, in the middle of the night, my fiancé started yelling gibberish in his sleep. When I tried to wake him, he punched me square in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 230

You deserved it 6 973

By randomguy - 09/07/2012 15:09 - United States - Saylorsburg

Today, I woke up after my pregnant fiancée punched me in the face. Apparently, I rolled over in my sleep and knocked her out of bed. She is still pissed about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 959

You deserved it 12 160

By Wowsers. - 30/01/2010 08:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I was woken up by my own fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 801

You deserved it 35 996

Love hurts

By wray16 - 26/02/2021 21:30 - United States

Today, while my girlfriend and I were making out, she went to fix the pillow behind her head and punched me straight in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 812

You deserved it 127

Sleep punching is a thing

By Anonymous - 13/09/2021 02:00

Today, I woke up to a punch in the face. My girlfriend said it was because she dreamed that I'd bought all her friends Taco Bell but didn't bring her anything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 966

You deserved it 101

By Big Baby - 28/01/2017 00:00

Today, I was awoken by my wife patting my head and talking in her sleep, asking, "Who is this? Who am I touching?" She then rolled over and farted on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 440

You deserved it 805

By happybidet - 31/10/2016 13:02 - United Kingdom

Today, my girlfriend woke me with a surprise up on my birthday. Unfortunately, it was her screaming at the top of her lungs and punching me in the face because of a nightmare. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 708

You deserved it 880

By hotboxed - 13/07/2019 18:30

Today, while we were sleeping, my girlfriend and I rolled to opposite sides of the bed. When I woke up, I moved closer and wrapped my arm around her. Her response was to fart in her sleep, resulting in a smell so noxious that I had no choice but to roll back to the other side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 600

You deserved it 385

Next

Top comments

Zenma 0

Wednesday 30 September 2009 9:31

I smell win(d).

allmidnighteyes 10

Wednesday 30 September 2009 9:35

What... the ****?

Comments

SS_Anon 0

Friday 2 October 2009 1:19

two words: FUKKIN SAVED!

Zero198209 0

Friday 2 October 2009 4:02

get her back----STEP ONE--EAT LOTS OF BEANS.BURRETOS ECT.STEP 2 ---CONVINCE HER TO GIVE U SOME BRAINS---STEP 3---CROP DUST HER FACE JUST AS YOUR SPOUTING OFF... STEP 4 PULL OUT AND RUN LIKE HELL...... LOL

dsnke1 0

Friday 2 October 2009 4:42

lmao #114. if it was me i would take a dump on her head while shes giving head

anbu4312 0

Friday 2 October 2009 6:10

Your gf is an epic idiot........lmao

jmoose311 3

Friday 2 October 2009 9:44

YDI. You shouldn't be sleeping with girls unless you're married first. You shouldn't have even been in the same bed.

Witchcraft_fml 4

Friday 2 October 2009 10:02

Oh, grow up.

SiLvEr_070 5

Sunday 1 November 2009 11:55

I agree, he should go back to the monastery =]

kristabelle 0

Friday 2 October 2009 10:10

Nice #96! this FML is my fav for sure!!! I too have startled myself awake with an earth shaddering kaboom lol can't stop laughing!!!

guy_on_the_couch 0

Saturday 3 October 2009 3:43

LMAO! AWESOME! That will keep me laughing for days!

gerb234 0

Saturday 3 October 2009 20:57

i cant stop picturing it hahahahhaahhaa

sarahandchanel 0

Sunday 4 October 2009 4:46

LMFAOOOO

mich_20 0

Tuesday 6 October 2009 8:27

I could not stop laughing when I read this! So funny!

Mr_schadenfreude 0

Tuesday 6 October 2009 18:00

that's quite an idea for an alarm clock you got there!

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Keywords

Public freakouts Health Relatable Geek Scams Music Poopoo peepee Awkward Jewelry Cops Transportation Bikes Fight Kids Family AITA Mother in law Miscellaneous Relationship advice Social Media Love Work Art Students Noise Birds Animals Sleep Mental health Medication

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I agree, your life sucks 28 753

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 1 321

You deserved it 272

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I agree, your life sucks 80 670

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I agree, your life sucks 1 187

You deserved it 436

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I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 708

Today, my girlfriend trusted me enough to tell me that she's trans. I have no problem with this, the problem is my sister overheard her. She ran and told our parents, who are also our landlords, so now either I dump the woman I love or we'll both be homeless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 146

You deserved it 310