Today, I was masturbating, and out of the corner of my eye I saw a figure. It was my neighbor staring at me through the window with a total look of disgust. I moved in this weekend and hadn't yet introduced myself to her. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, as I sat on the toilet, I heard a noise outside. I peered through the window and found myself staring directly at my neighbor. FML
Today, I was masturbating in the dark with the door open. I thought I saw a figure outside my door, because I didn't have my glasses on. After intensely staring at the dark figure for about a minute, thinking it was my imagination, my stepdad said, "You know, I'm looking RIGHT at you." FML
Today, while I was sitting on the toilet, my toddler swung the door open. We just bought the house, and we have no curtains. Our new neighbor, who I haven't met, was mowing her yard. I stood half-naked to close the door, and our eyes met. I froze. She waved. FML
Today, my crazy neighbor came up to me in the street and slapped me across the face, accusing me of leering through her restroom window while she showered. I'm gay. FML
Today, I ran into my new apartment neighbor. She said she could hear me and my girlfriend having wild sex last night. She told me she had always wanted to have a threesome. My new neighbor is as old as my grandma, and even resembles her. I politely declined. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of my neighbor pleasuring himself. FML
Today, I was masturbating in my bedroom, when suddenly, my mom opened the door and walked in with guests. I didn't react quick enough. FML
Today, while masturbating at the computer, I was interrupted by a flash of light out of the corner of my eye. As I turned to face it, I realized I forgot to close the blinds. Standing at the window in the appartment across the street were two girls, one had a camera and was snapping a second shot. FML
Today, as I was going to bed, I spotted a man staring at my window from a neighbor's yard. Ten minutes later, he was still there. I freaked out, started crying, and contemplated calling the cops. My creeper turned out to be the neighbor's wooden lawn ornament. FML
Today, I peeked through my window and trained a pair of binoculars on my neighbour's house. Every night without fail, he ends up standing in front of his window topless to flex his muscles. This time, I was surprised to instead find a note taped to the window saying, "Sorry, I'm out tonight." FML
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Top comments
Calyx_fml 22
Go over and shake her hand in greeting.
glittercookies 12
Give her a look of disgust for being a voyeur!
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Comments (224)
sougstad 7
I, I, I work out!!!
BostonBruinsFan 8
"wiggle wiggle wiggle yeah! IM SEXY AND i KNOW IT
austin_is_me 9
"hey get used to it most guys do it" "oh no I wanted to join" ":D" ":D"
Rachaelc23 8
Always make sure the windows are closed before unless you like being watched! YDI
leaffan 1
What's she doing looking through your window
JadeWalker 14
Fyl, why the hell was she watching you.
Kayla_Zee_Ninja 8
What if she was vibrating to him jerking and that's just her face when she vibrates... What if that was just her face and she dazed off. It makes sense it you don't think too much XP
Cinny90 7
I think someone likes you! Next time you see her you smile, wave and then raise your eyebrows a couple of times. Bet she's staying far away from you for sure after that.
spaffler 2
"Well... You saw mine, time to show me yours. ;)" nuff said
perdix 31
"Say hello to my leetle frien'!"
goose85427 0
did you keep going