Today, my best friend and I were playing Call of Duty when he said he had to go to the bathroom. Curious, I checked his phone. A text message read, "Tell your friend you're going to the bathroom and come eat. Pizza is here" from his dad. Apparently, I'm not good enough to feed. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out I can't go to my best friend's birthday party. To cheer me up, my parents decided to take me and my brother to my favorite pizzeria for dinner. When I was ready and went downstairs, I discovered they left already. They forgot me. FML
Today, I was on the toilet, when the girl I really like decided to call. I'd left my cellphone in my room and my dad answered. All he said was, "He's taking a shit. This might take a while." and hung up. FML
Today, I was feeling sick, so I called my boyfriend who lives down the street to come and keep me company. He replied with, "no, I can't come over, I'm busy, I'm playing xbox." FML
Today, I was in bed sick from pneumonia. I asked my boyfriend to nuke a can of soup for me. He said "in a sec, let me finish this game" and continued to play on his Xbox for an hour. Starving, I crawled out to make soup. When I sat down to eat, he paused the game and asked "you didn't make me any?" FML
Today, I was hyping myself up to work out after weeks of being a lazy slob. I slapped my workout gear on, got my Spotify playlist ready, and just as I was about to start, my friend texted me asking if I wanted pizza. I’m now in my workout clothes, eating pizza on his couch. FML
Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML
Today, I made a nice meal for myself and sat down to eat. Suddenly, my dad burst into my room saying, “We have to go.” This isn’t the first time it’s happened, nor was it an emergency. My family just doesn’t tell me when we have plans. FML
Today, I had six friends round for pizza. When I went to answer the door to the delivery, my friends turned off the lights and pretended they weren't there when I shouted for help carrying all the food. Not only does the cute delivery guy think I'm greedy, but also that I have imaginary friends. FML
Today, at work, I was told I was a failure. Feeling like crap, I went to my best friend to see if he could make me laugh. He told me that he felt obligated to hang out with me, so he thought that we shouldn't anymore. FML
Today, I felt like cheating on my diet and ordered a pizza. My mom and my sister were napping, so I put in the delivery notes, “Please don’t knock.” The delivery guy knocked anyway. LOUD. My mom and sister got up and saw everything. FML
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Top comments
herpitydurteedur 0
Kill them >:3 I'd just be like oh hey I'm leaving and when they ask why just say oh cause I wouldn't want you to to feel like you have to share your precious pizza with me so I'll just go home.
ritzbits 0
pizza is delicious, you should have found them and took a slice.
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Comments (170)
tennischik211 11
He didn't take his phone with him?
molly2moon 0
Why would you take your phone to the toilet
tennischik211 11
He can't just leave his phone at his friend's house.
JayJ17 7
They could have each eaten less than they usually it's not that hard. They just chose not too...
Rach227 8
FYL and YDI he shouldn't have done that but you shouldn't have checked his phone it's private
addesso 0
That blows,I hope you blew his ass up!
chels1994 11
but hey at least you're playing a good game (;
chels1994 11
okay let me rephrase cuz y'all are sensative. at least I THINK you're playing a good game :)
KaelaKhaotic 5
Barge in and take some. >:D
lidemocr 0
Am I the only one here who thinks there is way more to the story? For instance, what if OP is at this guys house ALL the time and eats this family's food so much that OPs dad was fed up with it? I can totally see this. It doesn't necessarily make it right what they did but certainly more understandable. Just an idea.
tanksdad 0
I agree with you. There's always kids at my house and they freaking eat everything. Sometimes it's like enough is enough. I prolly would have just sent the kid home though and told him to come back in an hour
lidemocr 0
YES! what people don't understand is what a strain that can be. I mean if I'd have wanted another kid I would have had one, right? I could understand if it was an extremely close family friend or a relative but this nerd is probably over there 24/7 playing that game and eating constantly. Just my 2 cents
jessluvezsam 0
WTF? Who does that?? Lol
lovelinkinpark 1
You deserved it because he plays cod and cod sucks
THE_A_TEEN 28
A true gamer would appreciate all games, and keep his opinions to himself a 12 year old ( ie you ) would spew verbal diarrhea about a game which has a large fanbase plus he doesnt deserve it because of some damn game.
niiick97_fml 3
If he went #2, probably not.
dubst5p 5
That's what you get for being weird and going through people shit