Today, my best friend and I were playing Call of Duty when he said he had to go to the bathroom. Curious, I checked his phone. A text message read, "Tell your friend you're going to the bathroom and come eat. Pizza is here" from his dad. Apparently, I'm not good enough to feed. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out I can't go to my best friend's birthday party. To cheer me up, my parents decided to take me and my brother to my favorite pizzeria for dinner. When I was ready and went downstairs, I discovered they left already. They forgot me. FML
Today, I was on the toilet, when the girl I really like decided to call. I'd left my cellphone in my room and my dad answered. All he said was, "He's taking a shit. This might take a while." and hung up. FML
Today, I was feeling sick, so I called my boyfriend who lives down the street to come and keep me company. He replied with, "no, I can't come over, I'm busy, I'm playing xbox." FML
Today, I was in bed sick from pneumonia. I asked my boyfriend to nuke a can of soup for me. He said "in a sec, let me finish this game" and continued to play on his Xbox for an hour. Starving, I crawled out to make soup. When I sat down to eat, he paused the game and asked "you didn't make me any?" FML
Today, I was hyping myself up to work out after weeks of being a lazy slob. I slapped my workout gear on, got my Spotify playlist ready, and just as I was about to start, my friend texted me asking if I wanted pizza. I’m now in my workout clothes, eating pizza on his couch. FML
Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML
Today, I made a nice meal for myself and sat down to eat. Suddenly, my dad burst into my room saying, “We have to go.” This isn’t the first time it’s happened, nor was it an emergency. My family just doesn’t tell me when we have plans. FML
Today, I had six friends round for pizza. When I went to answer the door to the delivery, my friends turned off the lights and pretended they weren't there when I shouted for help carrying all the food. Not only does the cute delivery guy think I'm greedy, but also that I have imaginary friends. FML
Today, at work, I was told I was a failure. Feeling like crap, I went to my best friend to see if he could make me laugh. He told me that he felt obligated to hang out with me, so he thought that we shouldn't anymore. FML
Today, I felt like cheating on my diet and ordered a pizza. My mom and my sister were napping, so I put in the delivery notes, “Please don’t knock.” The delivery guy knocked anyway. LOUD. My mom and sister got up and saw everything. FML
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Top comments
herpitydurteedur 0
Kill them >:3 I'd just be like oh hey I'm leaving and when they ask why just say oh cause I wouldn't want you to to feel like you have to share your precious pizza with me so I'll just go home.
ritzbits 0
pizza is delicious, you should have found them and took a slice.
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Comments (170)
Omfgitsmia 15
This made me lol
JcLove8 0
cheap asses' lol
stacianichole 2
Don't invade your friend's privacy, and yes it sucks to be left out so...FYL for not being included but YDI for looking at his phone. It evens out.
Munchkin13 6
Why are you checking his phone anyways?
dubstepp 15
Yeah he is cheap and very rude. Did you do anything to make his dad not like you? If not parents these days are terrible
tatianaw 0
I would have found them. Said "hope you like the pizza" and then left. That's really ****** up. They were being selfish.
ohiyoly 6
wow, what a wonderful bestfriend you have.
NorfolkDude 2
There could be a variety of reasons for this and not necessarily a judgement of your value as a friend. For starters, they could have ordered a smaller sized pizza which could mean that it's only for family and they really weren't anticipating you coming over. It could also be that you mooched stuff off them in the past and they feel reluctant to give you things. It could also be that they're really stuck up and selfish. Who knows what the issue is but you should give your friend a benefit of a doubt. Perhaps if in the past you took but never gave, maybe you should start giving as well.
CurlyChica808 4
Same thing happened to me once. I was at a friends house with a big group of girls having a sleepover. They kept me up all night because I had to sleep on the hardwood, and when I woke up from a bad dream, I heard them quietly eating breakfast and saying 'is she awake? is she awake?' -_-
ohmandapants 17
That's your fault for being a sheep.
Maddoctor 10
How is that being a sheep exactly? Please explain.
Hunts160 5
throw the phone at the wall and make sure u break it