Miscellaneous: Today, my dad told me he had a present for me. It was his tooth,...

By Anonymous - 08/06/2015 14:11 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad told me he had a present for me. It was his tooth, which he had pulled out a few minutes before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 023

You deserved it 2 228

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Same thing different taste

By fmlpgh - 16/02/2010 11:51 - United States

Today, my husband told me to hold out my hand. He opened his, and in mine dropped a giant mutant tooth he had pulled a few months ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 569

You deserved it 2 713

By Anonymous - 06/09/2013 11:55 - United States - Louisville

Today, I saw my dad pick his teeth with a toothpick from a new box. He ate the food he got out of his teeth and put the toothpick back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 609

You deserved it 2 893

By Fox_Undercover - 30/04/2016 20:33 - United States - Wareham

Today, my dentist pulled the wrong tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 446

You deserved it 2 954

By meh - 04/01/2010 22:29 - United Kingdom

Today, I went to the dentist to get a baby tooth which had decayed removed. After almost an hour, I came out with a numb mouth and a missing tooth for life. It was not a baby tooth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 083

You deserved it 6 528

By GuitarNerd - 23/01/2017 22:41 - United States - Denver

Today, my mom told me that I would get to leave school halfway through the day. What she didn't tell me was that the reason I was missing school was to get 2 teeth pulled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 720

You deserved it 743

Surprise!

By BAMashleyx3 - 06/06/2019 06:07

Today, my dad texted me while I was in the dentist's chair getting my teeth cleaned. The dental hygienist jumped at the notification sound my phone made and split my gum open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 902

You deserved it 671

By sirengamer - 14/06/2017 20:00 - United States

Today, I was at my job where we buy precious metals. A man came in and said, "Here, I have something special for you." He then pulled a tooth out of his mouth that had dental gold on it and placed in it my bare hand. Yeah, special indeed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 982

You deserved it 313

By Toothy_Peg - 13/06/2009 15:13 - Australia

Today, I got a meat pie for lunch. I bit into it and felt something hard. I spat it out. It was a tooth. I checked my mouth in a panic and discovered, with mixed feelings of relief and horror, that the tooth wasn’t mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 89 222

You deserved it 4 332

By Dominique Richards - 20/02/2018 19:00

Today, I went to the dentist to get a tooth pulled. When I woke up I found out they pulled the wrong one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 801

You deserved it 221

By Anonymous - 22/03/2014 23:07 - United States - Auberry

Today, my dad decided to shave his beard. I told him I wanted him to keep it, so he took the shavings, put them in a jar, and left it in my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 718

You deserved it 13 274

El_Boxeador 14

Monday 8 June 2015 21:36

He's giving it to you so you cash it with the tooth fairy and get some money! ;)

RickySleeves 20

Monday 8 June 2015 21:48

So your dad just pulled out one of his adult teeth? Ouch!

Comments

alee38410 5

Monday 8 June 2015 21:33

What a nice surprise

mds9986 24

Monday 8 June 2015 21:54

A nith thurpristh

mds9986 24

Tuesday 9 June 2015 1:13

I tried to type like a person with no teeth would talk :(

CliffyB03 28

Monday 8 June 2015 21:33

It's the thought that counts! But seriously...ew

DFMLharsh 20

Monday 8 June 2015 21:41

That's the ugly tooth of life. You never get the present you expect!

MELKOZAR 27

Monday 8 June 2015 21:34

I tooth you not! This really happened!

DonkeyTeeth2013 22

Monday 8 June 2015 21:35

Well, it could have been worse.

slingerslasher 24

Tuesday 9 June 2015 3:34

Your name is donkey teeth. What are you hiding from us?

sunny354wi 8

Monday 8 June 2015 21:35

That's just childish!

StickyPickles 33

Tuesday 9 June 2015 0:45

Not at all, it's what dad's do.

MzZombicidal 36

Monday 8 June 2015 21:36

Maybe it's his way of attempting to compliment you by saying you look like a beautiful toothy fairy?

El_Boxeador 14

Monday 8 June 2015 21:36

He's giving it to you so you cash it with the tooth fairy and get some money! ;)

Philintheblankz 14

Monday 8 June 2015 21:37

Put it under your pillow, OP. Maybe you will get a shiny, new quarter.

ninjaassassinguy 17

Monday 8 June 2015 21:38

Did he at least brush well?

lovelockdown23 23

Monday 8 June 2015 21:38

Did you pay him? He obviously thought you were the tooth fairy.

Keywords

Poopoo peepee Love Embarrassing Miscellaneous Christmas Romantic Break-ups Annoying Money Gross Argument Ironic Awkward Friends Haircut Cute Lonely Holidays Relatable Work Bosses Capitalism Cars You're fired Covid Health Jealousy Cheating Kids Parenting

The Top

Today, I followed my daughter and found out she wasn’t with friends, she was on a date. I confronted her about the lie, but she takes after her mother, a lawyer, and steamrollered over me about invading her privacy, so even though she lied, she somehow has the moral high ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 568

You deserved it 2 715

Today, and ever since I told my wife I had sacked my secretary, a pretty redhead, I’ve noticed my wife has started reverting to her old habit of getting headaches on Fridays, which is normally sex night. Funny how this wasn’t a problem when I had a pretty secretary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 994

You deserved it 1 050

The Top

Today, my window got busted and won't shut properly. I live in a college dorm room and maintenance says they can't fix it for a couple of days. It's below freezing in my dorm and I can see my breath while trying sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 427

You deserved it 2 627

Today, a four pound can of tuna fell on my head at work, and it burst all over my clothes. Since I'm the manager, I had to stay all day reeking of tuna. Now I'm home, my damn cat won't leave me alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 641

You deserved it 4 438

Today, I went bowling. The guy at the lane next to us was bowling by himself and had a few of his own bowling balls, and he had one that looked like a yin-yang and it looked very cool spinning down the lane into the pins. Not really thinking, I casually said to him "Hey, I like your balls." FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 683

You deserved it 56 763

Today, I texted my boyfriend to see if he wanted to finally have sex today. His response was "Can't, Platinum just came out." I didn't know what that meant so I searched "Platinum 3-22-2009" on Google. I found out he's talking about a new Pokémon game. FML

I agree, your life sucks 128 705

You deserved it 24 386

Today, my girlfriend who lives in China contacted me and told me she'd been harassed by a guy and was thinking about pressing charges. The guy is someone I know from college - he promised me he would say "hi" to her for me while he was in Shanghai. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 172

You deserved it 5 258

Today, after struggling with an eating disorder and hiding my symptoms for months, I got up the courage to tell my mom that I need help. Then she asked if an ice cream would make me feel better. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 751

You deserved it 5 835

Same thing different taste

Surprise!

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