Today, I took my kids to visit their grandma. At one point while playing, my youngest said "Shit!", so I admonished her. My mom snorted and told me to "stop being such a little bitch", because it will make my kids into "lame prisses like their mother." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my normally very modest and prissy mom came home, pissed off about something. I asked her what was wrong, but she wouldn't say, and snapped at me to "fuck off." She then grounded me for "making" her use that kind of "vile language." FML
Today, I was listening to music while my grandma and mom were in the same room. I only had one headphone in. My mom, thinking I had both in, started telling my grandma how much of a "little bitch" I am. My grandma went on to say, "She's also a slut." FML
Today, I overheard my daughter compliment my mother by saying "My mom is way flabbier than you, Grandma." When I told her later that she hurt my feelings, she told me to "man up." She's seven. FML
Today, I was babysitting a little boy for the first time. He kept using all sorts of profanity toward me the whole evening, so I told his mom when she picked him up. She just grunted and muttered, "Fucking cunt-ass snitch." FML
Today, my 7-year-old used the word "crap". When I told her that she mustn't use that word because it's rude, she simply replied, "Mother, you should hear the words I use at school." FML
Today, in front of the entire family, I yelled at my mom and told her she wasn't a good parent. She responded with, "Well, at least I had friends when I was your age." FML
Today, I went to see my mother with my kids. Before, I had told my son to give her hugs and kisses and I would buy him candy. He did, but then he told her that I said that. FML
Today, I was at Walmart with my mom when a guy next to me let out a series of vicious farts. Assuming it was me, my mom chewed me out in front of the guy and made me apologize. The man looked at my mom and said, "Children, they're so immature." FML
Today, after being annoyed one too many times by my students' whiney attitudes, I accidentally blurted out, "Quit being such a bitch," to the superintendent's daughter. FML
Today, I angrily scolded one of my employees for making an avoidable mistake for the third time. Unfortunately, my mother decided to pay me a surprise visit, and arrived mid-rant. She chewed me out for being mean and made me apologize. Now everyone at work calls me "mama's boy" and nobody takes me seriously. FML
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Top comments
holllla_fml 3
Maybe you shouldn't be a lame prissie then.
ganjaranja 10
Hahaha wonder what Granny was like when you were growing up.
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Comments (112)
holllla_fml 3
Maybe you shouldn't be a lame prissie then.
holllla_fml 3
*prissy? Sissy?
freakinglaugher 10
Prissy is a slightly worse version of sissy, but better than p****. Also, you should of just yelled at your mom to go sit in the corner. The more dramatic, the better.
deviable 9
Hmm swearing can be healthy for you, but over using it wears out the effect. If you teach your kids not to swear often then it's better for their health. Plus someone who uses their swears sparingly tends to accumulate a better vocabulary. Thus, it is generally a good idea to teach your kids not to swear excessively.
LlGHTS 1
OP's mother reminds me of George's mother Benny on the show George Lopez. :3
GODert 8
No matter what her kids will excessively swear a lot because they are kids.
ferrettamer 6
**** you 38, you ******* piece of... ******* ****.
biggestfan23 11
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Honestly young kids shouldn't be surrounded by that type of language
Discombobulated9 12
I'm not going to lie to you guys; I had to type 'admonished' into google to find out the definition...
Nxty 2
OP should have said; "It takes one to know one."!
ieatzombiebrains 0
Why did OP say admonished? Could have just said punished or scolded or something less condescending
dreamcatcher11 4
#60 Kids don't just swear because they're kids.. they swear because they've been brought up to believe it's ok, which it isn't.
Guren 0
wtf does admonish mean? discipline?
Nxty 2
85- Maybe she just wanted to elongate her sentence. Or she's just more advanced than you are...
RrLSf19 0
Great grandma....
BrickWalls 2
#62 ******* **** **** >:)
MMAlegendDAWT 0
......sooo just a question and feel free to make me look dumb....but what does admonished mean?? I think that word is keeping me from enjoying the full effect of this fml. And please don't say check the Internet....if I was too lazy to do that now I will be when you ask me too...
buck33 14
85- Aren't you being condescending to the OP?
xcarxcrashx 9
It saddens me that so many people were too lazy to go google admonished.
ganjaranja 10
Hahaha wonder what Granny was like when you were growing up.
npnptracking 7
Probably the coolest grandma on the block.
deviable 9
Or the meanest.
ganjaranja 10
nah she sounded like she had that motherly knowledge
MagicallyFat 12
OP just got shit on by her mother
geon_olam 17
GET THE **** OVER HERE and carry my walker up the stairs, ********!
monkeysareyummy 0
Easy now 107.. Take it easy.
Jakesterk96 8
Let's all just calm the **** down.
ThisIsMyReign 4
She could be like the grandma from beer fest.
TJD28 3
stop being a bitch
fmlluver1415 6
they should have that button (;
moop256 10
Yeah op quit being such a ******* **** you piece of shit I hope you morherfucking die you asshole... BLUE WAFFLE!!!
moop256 10
Ahem excuse me MOTHERFUCKING
moop256 10
You guys are a ducking idiots Aww nerts
zombicidal 11
when asked if people liked moops comments 5% said yes 10% said no and %85 said who the hell is moop (south park reference)
sweetbeast43 5
I read that in an aziz ansari voice.
moop256 10
What's south park?
CryMoreFMLs 15
111 - That pain you feel? It is shame.
BRBsummer 9
Wow.
moop256 10
So you guys going to answer question or no. Other wise ferme la bouche ;)
moop256 10
Ok I googled it looks like a low budget kids show. Wtf?
Takuya272727 16
It's because it is. I've seen a few episodes of it too. I just don't understand why everyone likes it so much. It's meh at best.
moop256 10
I'm not from north America so I have no idea about these sort of thing everyone just seems to hate on foreigners for not knowing about western pop culture.
candirose711 0
Pretty sure you live under a rock..
Kayokku 1
136, it's supposed to look low-budget. It's part of their style. Honestly, some of the stuff they say and do on that show just wouldn't be as funny if it didn't look the way that it does. Seriously though, the episode with the kids' band Moop is pretty good. Not their best, but it's still funny. x) You should look it up, they have all the episodes up at Southparkstudios.com for free to watch.
moop256 10
No 164 but i lived Iraq in, kind of sounds the same...
subwoofa 0
Oh my gosh.. I would love to have a grandma that awesome
boofgall 16
Want mine?
Climaxx 11
I'd give you mine. But then you'll have to spend most the day helping her dig every daisy out of her lawn, all while not messing up her lawn. :L
chelseaaababyyy 17
50 - i used to dig up weeds with my grandma. i miss those days /:
EatnBeef 7
Back in my day we disciplined all them youngens hardcore. We used to hogtie them varments and drag em through town and let everyone throw stuff at em. But I reckon that was little too tough since they all died.
maskedman 9
Climaxx, it makes me sad to think that your grandmother is pushing up daisies.
21jason 9
Good point.
Mitcha857 0
Grandma of the year award! We all know she's right too! OP quit getting your panties in a bunch over words
macdaddymady 8
Its seems like you're in a dilemma.
moop256 10
Not really a dilemma usually isn't funny... This is ******* hilarious :D
isaianpee 0
Seems like once I have found you beautiful MacDaddy
isaianpee 0
I mean you're hot as hell
shbhakta 0
hey sexy i love ur eyes what color r they
JFAW 6
Kids these days are really out of control.
soccercreator7 3
Yea what the **** is wrong with these stupid mother ******* kids that don't know to to keep their ******* mouths closed from speaking shit like that. The ******* sons of bitches that teach their own ******* children how to curse. Pieces of shit. That's what they are.
freakinglaugher 10
It's been science-tit-fuckly proven that ******* swearing will ******* make you ******* feel better and ******* relieve stress. Ya ***hole *** **** ****** bacon **** *** armpit *** in *** with batman. FML Devs please don't hurt me. Or above.
deviable 9
Yeah but if you swear too often it stops having beneficial effects. Poop.
freakinglaugher 10
When I'm home alone sometimes I shout.... WEINER!! I'm so bad.
kimmi41509 10
It's not being a lame priss, it's having manners. Something children lack these days -___-
KeyboardWarrior 10
Because the grandparents spoil them, and think its their job to be the parents.
kimmi41509 10
That doesn't sound like spoiling to me, sounds like a bitchy granny far along in menopause.
twilightluvr101 4
Its called a sence of humor something u lack these days
koolkat27 13
106- for you its called a spell check, which apparently you lack.
koolkat27 13
106- for you its called a spell check, which apparently you lack.
kimmi41509 10
That isn't humor dude, that's just straight up disrespect. Maybe it's humor for you if you're trailer trash.
IDontKnow10101 14
with grandmas like her I wonder why
pinkcrayola 0
Granny didn't sound like she had too much respect either. It's not just kids these days.
ihasbrains 10
Agreed. There are many adults who I wouldn't think to give respect because they're so rude and haughty. Part of this whole 'kids don't have respect' is that you haven't earned it from them. Just because you are an adult doesn't mean you're entitled to it.
NippsSlipps 10
Mothers know best ????
deviable 9
They're not her kids, don't let her decide how to raise them.