Today, I took my kids to visit their grandma. At one point while playing, my youngest said "Shit!", so I admonished her. My mom snorted and told me to "stop being such a little bitch", because it will make my kids into "lame prisses like their mother." FML
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College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, my normally very modest and prissy mom came home, pissed off about something. I asked her what was wrong, but she wouldn't say, and snapped at me to "fuck off." She then grounded me for "making" her use that kind of "vile language." FML
Today, I was listening to music while my grandma and mom were in the same room. I only had one headphone in. My mom, thinking I had both in, started telling my grandma how much of a "little bitch" I am. My grandma went on to say, "She's also a slut." FML
Today, I overheard my daughter compliment my mother by saying "My mom is way flabbier than you, Grandma." When I told her later that she hurt my feelings, she told me to "man up." She's seven. FML
Today, I was babysitting a little boy for the first time. He kept using all sorts of profanity toward me the whole evening, so I told his mom when she picked him up. She just grunted and muttered, "Fucking cunt-ass snitch." FML
Today, my 7-year-old used the word "crap". When I told her that she mustn't use that word because it's rude, she simply replied, "Mother, you should hear the words I use at school." FML
Today, in front of the entire family, I yelled at my mom and told her she wasn't a good parent. She responded with, "Well, at least I had friends when I was your age." FML
Today, I went to see my mother with my kids. Before, I had told my son to give her hugs and kisses and I would buy him candy. He did, but then he told her that I said that. FML
Today, I was at Walmart with my mom when a guy next to me let out a series of vicious farts. Assuming it was me, my mom chewed me out in front of the guy and made me apologize. The man looked at my mom and said, "Children, they're so immature." FML
Today, after being annoyed one too many times by my students' whiney attitudes, I accidentally blurted out, "Quit being such a bitch," to the superintendent's daughter. FML
Today, I angrily scolded one of my employees for making an avoidable mistake for the third time. Unfortunately, my mother decided to pay me a surprise visit, and arrived mid-rant. She chewed me out for being mean and made me apologize. Now everyone at work calls me "mama's boy" and nobody takes me seriously. FML
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Top comments
holllla_fml 3
Maybe you shouldn't be a lame prissie then.
ganjaranja 10
Hahaha wonder what Granny was like when you were growing up.
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Comments (112)
xgetxbentx 13
Sorry, but that's ******* hilarious.
firemedic919 0
so stop being a lame ass priss
THE_A_TEEN 28
Yeah, let kids learn to swear and to disrespect people! And let's bash OP here for actually trying to teach manners! (sarcasm) Seriously, the behavior of MOST of these comments, the support for the granny, the bashing of OP(like the one above me) are examples of why most kids are brats.
bizarre_ftw 22
Well apparently lame-prissiness is something you're born with, not something you learn throughout life, just look at you! Look at the mother that taught you wrong from right! And see how you turned out?
Fmlsea 28
Shit isn't as bad as some words I've heard out of kids mouths , ur lucky it was only shit and not something esle.
rastafarhi 0
Don't shelter your kids from hard truths of the world, swearing being one of them.
THE_A_TEEN 28
Teaching a kid not to swear when they're young is not sheltering, it's called manners and this is coming from a sheltered kid.
Ins0mau 20
Swearing is a "hard truth of the world"?! LMAO
itstoru 2
lmfao. what a cool mother you have. aha
kmikelg 1
Everyone is going on about the kid swearing and the grandman im more concerned with who uses the word "admonished"??? Cmon really now.
Okayitwasme 0
It actually means Ship High In Transit, because of the gas it emitted manure was transported higher up on ships. It's not a swear word.
THE_A_TEEN 28
What? You're WAY OFF! Shit is a term for fecal matter(poop, poo-poo, ca-ca, crap, feces, turd, etc.) and an insult. Look it up on urban dictionary, ANY ONLINE DICTIONARY, or wikipedia!
Okayitwasme 0
Check out 'SHIP HIGH IN TRANSIT.' lol! Google it!!!!!!!!! I just did and it said what I just said!
jojimugo 20
You guys are ******* crazy, stop with all the ******* cursing
Suzumebachi 5
I would have just said, " the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, you decrepit bitch!"