Today, I took my kids to visit their grandma. At one point while playing, my youngest said "Shit!", so I admonished her. My mom snorted and told me to "stop being such a little bitch", because it will make my kids into "lame prisses like their mother." FML
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College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, my normally very modest and prissy mom came home, pissed off about something. I asked her what was wrong, but she wouldn't say, and snapped at me to "fuck off." She then grounded me for "making" her use that kind of "vile language." FML
Today, I was listening to music while my grandma and mom were in the same room. I only had one headphone in. My mom, thinking I had both in, started telling my grandma how much of a "little bitch" I am. My grandma went on to say, "She's also a slut." FML
Today, I overheard my daughter compliment my mother by saying "My mom is way flabbier than you, Grandma." When I told her later that she hurt my feelings, she told me to "man up." She's seven. FML
Today, I was babysitting a little boy for the first time. He kept using all sorts of profanity toward me the whole evening, so I told his mom when she picked him up. She just grunted and muttered, "Fucking cunt-ass snitch." FML
Today, my 7-year-old used the word "crap". When I told her that she mustn't use that word because it's rude, she simply replied, "Mother, you should hear the words I use at school." FML
Today, in front of the entire family, I yelled at my mom and told her she wasn't a good parent. She responded with, "Well, at least I had friends when I was your age." FML
Today, I went to see my mother with my kids. Before, I had told my son to give her hugs and kisses and I would buy him candy. He did, but then he told her that I said that. FML
Today, I was at Walmart with my mom when a guy next to me let out a series of vicious farts. Assuming it was me, my mom chewed me out in front of the guy and made me apologize. The man looked at my mom and said, "Children, they're so immature." FML
Today, after being annoyed one too many times by my students' whiney attitudes, I accidentally blurted out, "Quit being such a bitch," to the superintendent's daughter. FML
Today, I angrily scolded one of my employees for making an avoidable mistake for the third time. Unfortunately, my mother decided to pay me a surprise visit, and arrived mid-rant. She chewed me out for being mean and made me apologize. Now everyone at work calls me "mama's boy" and nobody takes me seriously. FML
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Top comments
holllla_fml 3
Maybe you shouldn't be a lame prissie then.
ganjaranja 10
Hahaha wonder what Granny was like when you were growing up.
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Comments (112)
QWERTYCommander 5
Swear words really only amount to words in the end. FYL for your mom trying to tell you how to parent; YDI because no one should be deprived of the great feeling you get when you shout "****!!!" as loud as you can when you're having a shitty day.
iwadasn 33
Placing boundaries on your children and teaching them decorous behavior is a parent's job. Most parents these days neglect that job and that's why so many kids are unbearable brats. I say the OP is doing a great job parenting, and her kids will turn out just fine as long as Grandma stops trying to undermine her authority in front of them.
polkadot3155 6
she would know..
meruu_2005 1
Tell her to have fun in the future retirement home your putting her in
lildrake 0
Mom can be major...
Tvolsfan325 13
what a great role model
Justaguy17 0
It's scary how similar your mom sounds to my mom...
RensM 22
never grasped the bad word concept. it's all about context not the word... so why bleep or correct the use of the word. I mean why is it not ok to say "I love to **** you" but it is ok to say "I fornicated and sodomsided that prositute hard without her permission" where the last is definitely less kind and more horrible. So what is a bit of swearing now and then... it's just words... unttered in annoyance, people can say far worse things in very polite and more sociable accaptable terms.. it's just hypocrite
AmbrosiaWriter 17
Uhm, I don't know about you, but I wouldn't be okay with anyone saying EITHER of those things. The first one just says the person is crude, the second one says that person is a pompous rapist. Who on this Earth told you that the second sentence was okay to say? You can get a lot out of how someone phrases what they say, so there is something to be said for teaching children to speak properly or when it is okay to speak in a certain way with particular vocabulary.
nevershoutrun 0
Stbu next time. Bitch your mom out.
Iheartfunny 1
Yeah they're allowed to talk like that cause they're winners. That was a Talladega nights quote IN CASE YOU AINT KNOW WEST SIDE FO LIFE HOMIE!!! YEUH!!!
urmomshouse 0
I love it
TheJester12 15
mother knows best