Work: Grossed out

Grossed out

By ChePow - 20/08/2011 18:26 - Canada

Today, a stripper came into my work to get some posters copied. She asked if she could pay in small bills. I just touched $50 that have probably rubbed up against a stripper's twat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 513

You deserved it 6 522

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Same thing different taste

Assumptions

By adriana - 01/09/2009 16:48 - United States

Today, I went to the bank to deposit the cash I made waiting tables. While the teller was counting, I apologized for having so many small bills. She said "It's OK honey, I helped another one of your kind just the other day. You're lucky we take your dirty money." She thought I was a stripper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 337

You deserved it 4 586

Everything is clean

By Anonymous - 17/01/2020 18:00

Today, I went to the bank to deposit the cash I made waiting tables. While the teller was counting, I apologized for having so many small bills and she said "It's OK honey, I helped another one of your kind just the other day. You're lucky we take your dirty money." She thought I was a stripper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 754

You deserved it 237

By Big B - 04/02/2009 17:40 - United States

Today, I was at the strip club. I put my dollar on the stage. When the stripper came over to take it, she stood me up and flipped my tits and said I had bigger ones than her. I'm a guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 046

You deserved it 45 519

Get out of here

By Cpt Colin - 03/01/2012 07:17 - United States

Today, my girlfriend hated the idea of sex so much she was willing to give me money for a stripper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 860

You deserved it 5 974

By Anonymous - 07/10/2010 23:45 - United States

Today, my cousin and his fiancée took me to my first strip club experience. One of the strippers came over and danced for me. She pulled her thong string out and I tried to place the dollar in it with my mouth. I missed, to which she said "Put it in there, retard." FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 595

You deserved it 34 610

By Anonymous - 30/05/2009 11:39 - Canada

Today, I won $200 a contest at a bar. The manager took me to a vault where money collected from the strippers go into a pool. He told me that at least half of the bills were slid through a strippers butt crack so I was to "choose wisely". FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 649

You deserved it 9 035

By Anonymous - 21/04/2009 18:12 - United States

Today, I was running the register at my work and this big lady pulls her wad of cash out of her bra and hands it to me. The bills she handed me were moist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 82 281

You deserved it 3 865

By Anonymous - 14/09/2011 15:47 - United States

Today, a lady came into my workplace to pay her $120 bill in one dollar bills. I kept losing count. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 827

You deserved it 12 643

By bakedplum - 01/11/2011 17:52 - United States

Today, I went grocery shopping. Being a bartender, I had a huge wad of dollar bills from cash tips. As I was counting them at the register, I looked at the cashier and joked, "You probably think I'm a stripper or something." He looked me up and down and said, "Uh... hell no." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 802

You deserved it 23 815

By Anonymous - 06/10/2010 23:18 - Canada

Today, my friends took me to a strip club for my 25th birthday. I went onstage with 5 dollars in my mouth to tip the dancer. She then took off my belt and pants and spanked me 25 times with the buckle end of the belt. I paid a stripper 5 dollars to whoop my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 678

You deserved it 38 521

Kayokku 1

Saturday 20 August 2011 23:46

That's the best kind of $50.

Grimmerie 31

Saturday 20 August 2011 23:49

lesbians exist.

Comments

jessecax 0

Sunday 21 August 2011 6:02

We're all ******, some of us just get paid.

MoreBeef 4

Sunday 21 August 2011 6:03

Well. Could be worse. Could have touched a male strippers arsehole.

Cram_Burglar 0

Sunday 21 August 2011 6:07

did they smell funny?

RoxxyHustle 7

Sunday 21 August 2011 6:08

any money you've ever touched has probably rubbed up against a stripper's twat. (or balls. . . . male strippers exist too)

katalva411 0

Sunday 21 August 2011 6:13

... Realistically, any small bill you have could have that risk.... My youth pastor pointed this out to us. Lol.

nannu_nannu 1

Sunday 21 August 2011 6:14

Haha shouldn't this be in the intimacy category? I mean, twat??

CuddieRyan 0

Sunday 21 August 2011 6:35

I don't see the problem here.

brunettebaby98 0

Sunday 21 August 2011 6:47

And i bet that was the best day of ur life

CuddieRyan 0

Thursday 25 August 2011 8:15

Apparently not if it was an FML. ;-;...

rolls_royce 0

Sunday 21 August 2011 6:57

Smells like rotting fish? Or she clean lol

baseballlegitly0 2

Sunday 21 August 2011 7:00

grats u have aids

WhtRabbid 2

Sunday 21 August 2011 20:36

You need to repeat your sex ed. class if you think that's how you get aids.

Keywords

Weird Miscellaneous Awkward Shopping My ex Racism Family Relatable AITA Love Kids Cheating Work Break-ups Animals Cats Cute Intimacy Sex Relationship advice Alcohol Coworkers Health Psychology Mental health Cops Neighbours Scary Stressed out Parents

The Top

Today, me and my boyfriend were fooling around on my bed when things started to get heated. I said to him, "Do what ever you want". He got up and said he'd be right back. I thought he went to get a condom. He came back with a sandwich. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 160

You deserved it 11 993

Today, I had to catch a bus to work, as my car had to be taken in yesterday. The bad drivers always upset my stomach with their instant stop/start driving style. I felt a burp coming on, but it turned out to be projectile vomit that filled my mask right up and poured down my shirt and pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 214

You deserved it 185

The Top

Today, I was kicked out of my review lecture at community college, for "being a disturbance and refusing to stop whistling." I wasn't even given a chance to explain that I have a cold. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 525

You deserved it 2 502

Today, my boyfriend told my hamster he loved her. Repeatedly. In 'cute' baby voices. He has yet to say it to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 362

You deserved it 5 778

Today, I told my friends I had been hiding something that I wanted to come clean on. My one friend responds by saying, "FINALLY you come out of the closet. It's about time." I'm not gay. I was just going to tell them my parents were getting a divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 695

You deserved it 4 742

Today, I found out I received a "D" on my ethics exam, not because I did not know the information or did not follow the correct guidelines for writing the moral arguments, but because according to my professor my moral values are wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 310

You deserved it 3 896

Today, I discovered that when my husband agreed to donate sperm so an infertile friend and his wife could have children, there was nothing "artificial" about the insemination. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 505

You deserved it 6 150

Today, my son got drunk and managed to colour in my bald patch with permanent marker while I was asleep. It’s super noticeable and I look like a complete prat. Plus in a few hours, I’m supposed to be on my first date since my divorce 12 years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 629

You deserved it 164