By bakedplum - 01/11/2011 17:52 - United States

Today, I went grocery shopping. Being a bartender, I had a huge wad of dollar bills from cash tips. As I was counting them at the register, I looked at the cashier and joked, "You probably think I'm a stripper or something." He looked me up and down and said, "Uh... hell no." FML
I agree, your life sucks 27 791
You deserved it 23 808

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Top comments

baygirl564 9

Well u did ask...

Wow, harsh…


iyf. Well if you're ugly you're ugly.

Damn_Hippster 11

So you want to look like a *****?

enonymous 8

Pretty people are hookers... Life lessons every day. I can't wait to buy a date from a few male nurses at my ER

LiveLaughFML 10

if there is a bright side to this situation, try and look into it. maybe he meant that you look like someone who has a lot of class and would never think of stripping? :-)

I don't ******* understand any of y'all.

McAninch35 9

The purpose of your comment is what, 30?

39- that he doesn't understand any of 'y'all'

enonymous 8

39 - to use y'all with that Texas twang

I pictured the guy having a feminine accent. Anyone? No? Well......**** me.

Well if you're a douche, you're a douche.

Don't get your chaps in a bunch "ya'll" "it's the Internet folks."

BlacOpsMaximus 5

what if its got nothing to do with her being ugly what if she's fat,, or what if she's like skinny as a stick with no voluptuous curves? Ehh,, look at me thinking outside the box ;P

1 I agree but to say it so harshly, that's just mean.

Boygenius50 8

Hey, I think Keyman's comments are probably above the comprehension of the average Texan, so clearly he's doing something right.

I smell a redneck!!

Boygenius50 8

98-Your use of the word "goodly" doesn't help the cause.

Llama_Face89 33

GOODLY?! Please...for the sake of the entire human race...tell me that was a joke....

Well OP, you opened the door for that one.

I don't ******* understand why "y'all" don't think "goodly" isn't a word, I've been taught on my grandpappys farm down in good old Texas that "goodly" is a king among words. *Snorts like an idiot*....To far?

Boygenius50 8

Haha I actually thought it might be a joke, I guess we'll have to wait til they come back to know for sure...

sierralovesyou 0

30- nothing to do with the comment/fml, but did you get a new picture? Jw

OP should take that as a compliment. Most strippers are ugly AF with STD's.

gibby1235 6

To people making jokes about texans - not cool peoples To people from Texas - it's a joke, this is fml, it was made to have fun on. You and I know that most assumptions people make about Texas are false. Let's leave it at that and move on. And to op - don't let it get to you I'm pretty sure your beautiful in your own way.

Boygenius50 8

149- *You're Stupid Texan. Go fall off of the upper deck.

Xo_CuPcAkLuVa_oX 6

Wow, aren't we all a little bit pathedic? Seriously stick to talking about the FML and stop talking shit.

Wow, harsh…

youcunthole 0

Well he works at a grocery store so now who wins


Harsh, yes. But I'm not sure if it'd been any better to be confused as a stripper. Your body may be repulsive, but at least no one believes your trashy.

#20 I work at a grocery store, but it doesn't mean that I'm a loser or anything. The checker mentioned in the FML is a loser because he sounds like a jerk.

youcunthole 0

Well age also plays a roll in it.. If he's like 16-20 then that's alright, but if hes like 40 then that's kinda loser-ish

#76 :/ Seriously? I don't think that's loser-ish at all. If people didn't occupy the "little" jobs like working at a grocery store, we wouldn't have grocery stores. I'm 22 and I'm a checker.

youcunthole 0

Is that really what you want to do all your life? No one wants to be a cashier all their life, they just never get a college degree or anything

Seriously? What a shitty worldview. Not everyone believes they need to be defined by the job they have. Many people I know have jobs that just pay the bills. Markets tend to have long hours so my friend, who's a brilliant artist, works at one when she doesn't have showings to work up for or so she can save up for travelling or touring with her bf.

My mother has a degree, and she's the manager of KFC. That doesn't mean that's all she wants to do with her life, and being a checker isn't "loser-ish".

Boygenius50 8

All cunthole means is that it's kind of depressing to see someone spend their entire life working in a boring and repetitive job, one that isn't really going anywhere and has almost no prestige associated with it. while this satisfies some people, and such people can be just as happy or more happy than a doctor/lawyer/athlete/astronaut, cunthole clearly is not among such people.

#83 Uh, dude? Did I ever say that was all I wanted to do with my life? I went to school and got a baking degree. Now I'm going back to school to get a bachelor's degree to have a second option. I currently have 2 jobs to support myself and pay for school. Besides, there's nothing pathetic about being a cashier.

EVERYONE is needed. EVERY worker contributes.

truebrotrue 7

Op should've counted really slowly, pay as much as she could have in coins, and paid in exact change

Nerdsgetmehot I remember you from that flat chested FML :) you are so hot though :)

youcunthole 0

Well 110 it can't be all that great considering u tried to post 117 fmls

Boygenius50 8

I believe 147 just KO'd the opposition

MrBoredGuy 1

He was just saying OP looked too classy to be a stripper

*puts on white knight armor* LEAVE NERDSGETMEHOT ALONE But seriously, it's pretty presumptuous to assume that people who work at grocery stores are failures in life. Especially where I live, the vast majority of checkers are either teenagers or women who don't solely depend on their job for their income. Btw, nerdsgetmehot, I'm a huge nerd and I'm only a week older than you. Does that make you hot? :) *takes off white knight armor*

SlaveToRetail 10

#94, your first sentence rhymed. :D

QueenChristy 6

#76 that's the dumbest thing I've ever heard. There's is no such thing as a "age-range" where the term loser is concluded in! It does NOT matter how old the cashier is! That was very disrespectful and un-called for. Age doesn't play a roll in it and its NEVER all right to insult someone

#147 The FMLs I submitted are all just many, many variations of the same 5 or 6 FMLs. You can submit the same FML more than once, y'know? My life is pretty darn awesome, thanks very much.

itsame0987 18

147 - it's even funnier that she says in her profile that it was just a few fmls written seeral different ways. That says to me someone is desparate to make it onto fml. But I agree about the cashier thing. And to answer the question who would do the job, easy high school and college students who need money.

#182 It's because I was unemployed and my parents were just getting divorced when I submitted those FMLs. I wasn't "desperate" to get an FML published, I was just bored and sad about my parents' situation. I already made it onto FML, I got one posted.

guys.. arguing on the internet is pointless its like winning the special olympics. ur still retarded

#186 No arguing going on here, at least not on my side.

178 - when somebody is 40 years old and lives in their mother's basement playing video games all day and have absolutely no part in paying the bills, then do you still think they're not a loser? There's no excuse for doing lazy shit like that, ever. Cashier job is different because it's a job that pays, and it's a job that is required by society. In my opinion it's right to insult someone if it's going to make them into a better/more useful person. Some people work better under pressure.

I'm still #team nerdsgetmehot

Nope, worked as a "checker" for about 2 months when I was 18. It blows. Now all you do is scan and it beeps? And people 40+ do this? That my friend is sad when you can even get promoted to stock! At 22, you're getting to the point where you should be moving on to a real job. One that makes more than 10 bucks an hour...

213 - very true. I guess some people are losers after all, lol.

Don't worry OP he only said that because when he looked you up and down, he realized that you are to classy to be a stripper... I think

#213 Are you kidding me? Did I not just state that I'm IN SCHOOL to get a degree? I've also already gone to school to be a baker. I am constantly applying for baking jobs. I'm not a loser, but you certainly are acting like a jerk.

And maybe someone who is a checker at 40 and has no other ambition is indeed sad. It depends on the situation. If they have nothing else in their life, I would be sad for them. However, I'm 22, working my way through school, and I would love to be a baker someday (as that's what I studied for). I have plenty of ambition to work towards something other than being a checker. I apply to as many baking jobs as I can each week. The only reason why I'm still a checker is because I need to for rent, food, gas, etc. I would be a loser if I quit my checker job and couldn't pay for any of those things. I'm doing what it takes to be able to live and support myself. Like I said, I also have a second job, which is customer service and making frosting at a bakery (and helping with baking when the baker needs it), so at least I'm getting my foot in the door to achieving what I want to be. What's sad about working towards an ambition? In my eyes, nothing.

Okay, nerdsgetmehot, thank you for telling everyone your life story. It's great that you are a 22 year old with a baking degree who is working on getting a bachelor's degree and is happy being a cashier... ANYWAY, 20 was obviously joking, so all the serious responses are quite unnecessary.

#219 I'm not happy being a cashier; I never said that. I'm actually quite miserable at that job, which is why I'm looking for a baking job and going back to school. I wasn't obvious to me that #20 was joking, as I don't really have a sarcasm detector for text on the internet, but thanks for that little insight. I just find it quite insulting when someone tells me that I'm pathetic because of my job "choice." I'm not a cashier by choice, I'm a cashier by necessity.

I'm sorry for being "too serious" about it, as I do tend to get that way, but assuming that I'm pathetic and have a terrible life just because one of my jobs is being a checker is just rude.

Yeah, I can see why it would bother you. But it does look kind of silly when you rant about a comment that wasn't serious at all. Besides, why should you care about the opinion of someone who truly believes that people with jobs that aren't "glamorous" are pathetic? I'm sure you know that most people won't assume that you're pathetic just because you're a cashier, so it's best to just ignore such comments, or assume that they are sarcastic.

But I'm sure you know all of that; you were probably just angry when you posted those comments.

Cunthole already won this a long time ago.

You don't need a college degree to be a fast food manager anyways..but who cares what people think about the quality of someone else's job, atleast they are getting paid.

#226 I actually didn't know that most people wouldn't think I'm pathetic for being a cashier. I thought most people would, seeing as how most customers treat me at work. I think the main reason I was so mad at cunthole is because I experience people like that at work every day. I get treated with a lot of disrespect, and it's obviously because I'm in a "low" position. I just get tired of that mindset, you know? It just doesn't seem fair to treat a human being as being "less" than other people because they're working a minimum-wage job.

youcunthole 0

No need to tell your whole freaking life story

Boygenius50 8

230- You seem to be taking all of these comments very personally, even though you're not really the type of person cunthole was talking about. It's sad when you see someone working at a grocery store as a last resort, or doing it their entire life. You obviously have other things going on (as you explained in your autobiography above) so you're not one of those people. So you can stop getting offended now, k?

This could mean that she is too pretty to be a stripper...

youcunthole 0

That's stupid and doesn't make sense

maniaccy 8


Fitzinator1995 13

I work at a grocery store too!

baygirl564 9

Well u did ask...

Plus, do you want to look like a stripper? If he said yes, you look like one you'll probably get offended. So either way...

Xx_Dakota_xX 1

He was just being considerate :P

he was probably scared to say anything or hes shy.

If someone says hell no to a complete stranger, how does that make them shy?

He was probably trying to be polite, figuring that saying yes would be worse.

ifinsane 6

Yeah NS don't ask questions you don't want the answer to.

It sucks ... Are you so ugly??

jbunch2514 0

Nah... You got a pic of what his face gay werewolf! not funny it has no purpose EXPLAIN AND FYL

Xx_Dakota_xX 1

62- are u thinking of Taylor lautner? Bc if u are that's not even close

u went to dennison. ur still a ******* asshole

62- dont rlly know where you got werewolf from but good for you

Sorry but I don't have werewolf on my picture -.-"

kleeweirdos 0

Ur a real mean bitch, did u know that?

Guessing that customer service wasn't complimentary

I like ur photo lol :p

Alexisthebestest 16

I brought a shirt with my friends in $1 bills (that's all I had) and they cashier asked me if I was a stripped and winked at me. That was 5 years ago... I still haven't heard the end of it.

Cool story bro

160- dont be a jerk

Alexisthebestest 16

Cool story bro just isn't funny after it's used 1,203,457 times.

Curly headed ****. (Had to be said)

Curls get the girls. Step brothers comment ftw. Haha

What a jackass. Being a checker at a grocery store, I know that comments like that can get an employee in a lot of trouble. I don't make comments like that though, because I'm a nice checker. ;) Sorry, OP! Sometimes you just have to choose not to listen to mean comments like that. As Eleanor Roosevelt (a wise lady) once said, "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."

lostintime94 5

You go girl!!

drlove78843 6

Do you live in this world?

#86 and #89 What does that even mean?

106, I believe 86 was trying to be a d-bag and put you down for being a decent human being who doesn't put people down and for quoting someone who isn't currently on a reality t.v. show. I think 89 was speaking to 86, as in "No, we don't live in this world"...sarcastically, since you seem 'so outside the norm' for being nice, especially on the internet. 89 can correct me if I'm wrong, I don't really mind what 86 has to say.

sierralovesyou 0

Oh my gosh people, shut up already! I am from the heart of dixie, and there is no grandpappy's farm, goodly isn't a word used on it, we don't snort like idiots, and yes, we use the word Y'ALL quite often. It means you all. Northerners need to shut the **** up, because last time I checked, 'pop' is the stupidest name I have ever heard for a SODA. good grief...

Okay, I am sorry, but what IN THE HELL did that have to do with ANYTHING?

137- wtf are you talking about. think u need to chill the **** out.

@6, yeah that cashier was a pretty big douchebag to say "Hell no". Though I did find it funny that the OP joked about him thinking she's a stripper for having a ton of bills. In my experience as a sales associate, women with tons of $1 are always a waitress or a bartender, not a stripper.

sillymcjews 0

now what the **** are you talking about?

Honestly, she walked right into that comment, besides, she just wanted to know her opinion on her question.

I totally agree with nerdsgetmehot. OP, don't pay any attention to what that jerk said - he knows nothing about you. I don't know you either, but I'm betting you're a beautiful person, both inside and out. And Eleanor Roosevelt was indeed a VERY wise lady. :)

You sound too cool for a checker!

emmanizzer 6

Commander Shepard! You're on FML!!! I can't wait until ME3! :D

Haha my name is sierra

Prove him wrong.

Pour him a drink. Once he gets his beer goggles on, ask him again.

rcloca 10

As they say.... Ok I got nothin'.

rcloca 10

Mmm k

emmanizzer 6

Well, not all strippers have to be pretty.

That's not really the point of the FML. I imagine that OP's a bit pissed at the fact that the checker inferred that she was ugly.

Not all strippers are pretty...

#111 I know that, I've been to a strip club.

Who asked?

emmanizzer 6

Well I understand that, it's just that he could have just been inferring that she doesn't look like she has the body to do pole tricks. Ha, I know it's unlikely, but it IS possible it wasn't about her attractiveness. Maybe? Possibly? Hopefully? No? :)