By OnPlanetVenus - 04/07/2013 04:41 - United States - Hallam

Today, I discovered that when my husband agreed to donate sperm so an infertile friend and his wife could have children, there was nothing "artificial" about the insemination. FML
I agree, your life sucks 71 483
You deserved it 6 147

Same thing different taste

Top comments

_daniellesays_ 10

Then there should no longer be anything "factual" about you two being married.

Chellybelly92 14

Whip his ass. No don't do that. Bad idea. But I'd seriously get a lawyer or a marriage counselor.


RivetingTaleChap 6

Well, that's a sticky situation.

nnnope 26

I don't think that really applies here, nor does this FML deserve to be made fun of.

Dusty_Busters 15
nnnope 26

oh right, I forgot how hilarious it is when a marriage is destroyed. bring on the down-thumbs. I'm not commenting on anything anymore.

#49 People who post to FML know what they're doing. FML is for inappropriately making fun of sick situations, maybe the OP will even have a laugh at it. And you shouldn't get so upset about some thumbs down from people who don't even know you, it's not personal, they just don't agree with you.

Llama_Face89 33

Jesus chill out. Why take life so seriously?

Haha ur hilarious thumbs up to that!

ginawater19 13

#49, you sound more pissed off than OP does. Either way she gave her husband permission to let another woman use his sperm to make children. I don't even think I would be comfortable letting my husband do that. So in that case, she seemed to be alright with it from the beginning. But now that she found out the real insemination process no body really knows from here. She could take it lightly like she did the other controversies. Really need to hear from OP on this one. In the mean time stop being an idiot

jeez there are a lot of trolls on FML today.... Is it a 4th July thing?

96) you do realize by her saying that there wasn't anything "artificial" about the insemination means that her husband ****** his friends wife.

Such a waste. Something better could have been done

Oh sorry 49, I forgot that FML is a completely serious website. I also forgot that fun isn't allowed on this websi- Oh wait.

Chellybelly92 14

Whip his ass. No don't do that. Bad idea. But I'd seriously get a lawyer or a marriage counselor.

A lawyer? 'I cheated on you' 'Im suing you for all your sperm!'

Chellybelly92 14

Ha that's kinda funny too, I was thinking more of a divorce lawyer though.

Did anyone mention the cost of artificial insemination? It cost a lot of money. There are other ways to look at this situation. Maybe he was doing a good thing. If he wore protection/was actually cheating(most likely)...kill him,grill his remains,find a dog and make him eat the remains, then burn the bones. If anyone asks where he went, tell them he left to work on artificial insemination...(the fore mentioned is illegal and most likely frowned upon in many areas. I HAVE NOT planned this out before.)

73, Obviously he didn't wear protection.

80- 73 said If he was wearing protection then he would be really cheating. Read more carefully before you critize.

106, I'm not criticizing, I just misunderstood.

MerrikBarbarian 9

Actually... Whip his ass sounds like an excellent idea. Well unless he is into that... Then it might be rewarding. Huh.

73 don't worry, I found your comment entertaining :)

Really, a lawyer is the first thing you think of? No wonder America is so litigious - how about a serious talk first....

_daniellesays_ 10

Then there should no longer be anything "factual" about you two being married.

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

You can also do an artificial insemination at home... just put the sperm in the ****** with something else than a penis.

Idk why you would be ok with your husband having sex with another woman for this.. All it takes is a jar of his baby juice and a turkey baster.

Well kind of. The act of sex actually does a lot to increase the chances for conception. A baster and sperm may or may not work as well as the actual act. I don't see a problem with the sex part if everyone was informed.

That's true I did read about that somewhere. Nothing wrong with her husband sexing her a little before hand though instead if you ask me

kxxjoejoexxk 8

Wow at the fml or at how bad your comment is?

imtooshy 18

How come I'm not hearing "my soon to be ex husband?" What a jerk! Sorry OP.

sorry OP you deserve better... I just donor why some people are such jerk offs.

Not sure if autocorrect or terrible pun...

Not completely terrible. Some of us enjoy such puns. :)

A jerk off would at least do the "proper" method of donation. This is just fuckery.

That's all kinds of ****** up. I like the way you worded that. Make sure the divorce is just as real. Also, take half his shit. Guys love that in a divorce.

The toilet takes all my shit. Why would I need a woman to take only half?

I never understood the term "artificial insemination". It always makes me imagine artificial sperm and women giving birth to androids. Or maybe I should stop snorting dried eggplant skin...

Sinistra_Blue 12

Star Wars - A New Hope "These aren't the sperm you're looking for."

You're right...these are not the sperm I'm looking for...

rabidpeach 5

does the eggplant skin really work? i've had no luck with zucchini

"in·sem·i·nate - v. To introduce or inject semen into the reproductive tract of (a female)." "ar·ti·fi·cial adj. 1. Made by humans; produced rather than natural. 2. Made in imitation of something natural; simulated. 3. Not genuine or natural" So, we take the process of injecting semen into the reproductive tract (insemination), but it not by intercourse, aka the process is 'artificial'. :D

He's a doctor. He knows what it is. He just disagrees with the terminology lol

KiddoKS 19

He needs a vasectomy so he can't offer to "donate" anymore. I know someone who could do it for you... Lorena Bobbitt

#14- I would bob and weave her so she couldn't sever my conceiver.

Shoot! I always cringed at the thoughts of Lorena Bobbitt but that's a walk in the park compared to what Catherine Kieu Becker did with her garbage disposal.

graceinsheepwear 33

51, actually rather than a walk in the park, it was a ride in a car with the window down.

14, really though. I think women would be more inclined to sleep with him after he pulls the "don't worry I can't get you pregnant" card.