By Anonymous - 06/10/2010 23:18 - Canada

Today, my friends took me to a strip club for my 25th birthday. I went onstage with 5 dollars in my mouth to tip the dancer. She then took off my belt and pants and spanked me 25 times with the buckle end of the belt. I paid a stripper 5 dollars to whoop my ass. FML
I agree, your life sucks 10 657
You deserved it 38 443

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Top comments

haha win for the stripper :) she got paid to beat your ass hahaha

I guess 5 bucks wasn't enough for her :)


omG_G00 0


paid2think 0

Your smiless fresh

H8rSk8r 0

Today, this fatso got up on stage at the strip club I work at. He expected me to do something hot. I took off his belt ( with my teeth ) and spanked him with it. Fatty didn't like spankings, so all I got was five f*cking dollars.

hairt 4

omg #8 you were the stripper?!!!!? :o :P

hahahaha you have 25 buckel prints on your butt!!

xThatAsianGurlx 0

@19 haha I guess you never know :P

Sanchez2021 0

What a square

YDI don't you know that's the sort of thing strippers ALWAYS do if you are dumb enough to go on stage???

haha win for the stripper :) she got paid to beat your ass hahaha

flighted 1

right, what else do you expect with $5?? I would have beat him too if I were a stripper and he gave me $5 lol

I guess 5 bucks wasn't enough for her :)

I guess 1 comment wasn't enough for you.

mif_fml 27


Oooouuuucchhhhhh !

omg Miley leave me alone no one is trying to tame you , be as unbridled as you want

I got worse on my bachelor party and paid more.... this is weak

kwmfl 4

Haha nice pic

If it was that bad, and that much of a FML, all you had to do was walk away. YDI.

Darling, NEVER offer money from your mouth! That's poor club etiquette! You were asking for it!

Oh darling. WILL YOU STOP FUCKING SAYING DARLING, darling? kiss kiss!

xThatAsianGurlx 0

Studies say most money type of bills have been in a strippers ass crack....

most money type of bills? are you sure they didn't mean duck bills?

WallyTheWombat 0

Supposedly 99% of bills have cocaine residue on them.

Actually it's more like 80%. I read a story on an urban legend website a few weeks ago. Still a pretty staggering number. Dr. Rockzo would be so ecstatic right now.

lol dr. Rockzo is awesome...

And 63.14% of all statistics are made up on the spot.

antoinemartinez 0

thts hard to belive but yur hot so I'll go with it

drsheena 0

that sentence she wrote did not make sense.

jtin13 0

I love you for the metalocalypse reference

hi,my name is Angel and I just wanted to say is that ur beautifull.

alex1646 0


fakkumairaifu 14

Higher denomination bills have more residue apparently. I read somewhere that they tend to be handled less than small bills, and thus are usually less porous thereby absorbing less of your nose candy. Can't give (non-made-up) percentages though.

34: Actually, not because strippers have used the money, therefore there are traces of cocaine on them, it's because when bills are damaged (ripped, burned, or sometimes a non-existent currency), they are burned and then used again. The cocaine, which is only a very small trace, is actually put there by the mint they were made in because the cocaine acts as if a thin protective layer, which protects the money from light damage and also, when the money is being burned, the cocaine layer helps it burn much, much faster. 49: It's 64%, dumbass.

you were obviously a very naughty boy. my suggestion: meet up with her after the club closes and show her how it's done. smack her 25 times. . . with your cock! :)

fits138 0

I def giggled when I read this!

onlyonefunny 2

Your sick..sick!!

BrendaButt 0