Today, someone spray painted a black skull on the side of my house. We painted over it and installed lights to hopefully persuade intruders not to vandalize the property because it would be a bright area. The lights were stolen. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I realized that someone spray painted a giant black cock on the front of my house while I was asleep. I also just recently painted my entire house yellow. Yellow doesn't cover up black penis very well. FML
Today, my house was broken into. They didn't take much, but they did paint spunking cocks on the walls and furniture. FML
Today, when I locked my newly repaired bike up, I carefully took the new rear light off it so that nobody could steal said light. Somebody stole my bike. At least I have a red light to play with. FML
Today, I finally managed to sleep, after two days of being kept awake by the miniature floodlights my neighbors have installed to scare off burglars. Only a couple of hours into my sleep, I woke up to the sound of their car being broken into. FML
Today, not only did someone steal my bike, they also managed to get wasted and drunkenly ride my stolen bike through my new screened-in front porch, destroying it and the bike. FML
Today, my house got robbed. They left a note: "Next time, we steal your souls." FML
Today, after having my car been broken into the day before because I didn't lock it, I made sure I locked my doors. When I got off shift and entered the parking lot, I noticed a brick had been thrown through my windshield and a note that said, "Nice Try". FML
Today, I bought a new mailbox to replace the old one that was stolen. Two hours after I put the new mailbox up, the old one was back and the new one was missing. FML
Today, I came home from work and found my house egged, and bricks thrown through my windows. I called the police, and submitted a report. Later that night, I heard the doorbell ring. Nobody was at the house, but there was a note saying "Sorry, wrong house". FML
Today, I woke up to a Swastika, "Go home" and "Trump2020" spray-painted on my car. FML
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Top comments
supersmeg12345 10
Next time install A few guard dogs and a machete
BlueEyed1019 12
That sucks, sorry! I have a sign that says "property monitored by security cameras" even tho it isn't, and it seems to work!
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Comments (135)
Jeffo193 13
Should've left the skull...that would have looked AWESOME xD
laden_swallow09 35
No. That would have looked trashy.
babe7260 30
We have security stickers on our windows & doors, so far so good!!!
bd1012 18
Sounds like a bad neighborhood :(
bertman21 5
Get yourself a gun. Guns don't kill people. People getting robbed kill people
Jasonf6 0
Sounds like a camera is in order, protected from theft of course.
Epiqness 0
Wow, sounds like a horrible neighborhood.
ankoku 2
A skull eh? Well I would have just gone ahead and painted kermit the frog instead.
angelinaanimerg 7
Time to Install cameras, a security system, or just save the trouble and just move.
runningoverdogs 0
better than a black dick
OfficeNinja 5
Get a bear trap. Hide it under some leaves. Install more lights. Wait for the screams of agony later that night.