The Top · The all-time greatest FMLs

I hate my life · 14 June 2026, 22:00 ·Boston, United States

Congratulations?

Today, I was reminded that I'd submitted a short story to a writing competition months ago when I got an email saying I'd won second place. I excitedly forwarded it to friends and family. A few minutes later, another email arrived, explaining they'd contacted the wrong person. My celebration lasted exactly eleven minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 378 You deserved it 70

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Not again!!! · 11 November 2024, 03:00 ·Istanbul, Turkey

Sometimes negativity is good

Today, my friend told me, "Just think positive!" to lift my mood. I unconvincingly replied, "Sure thing." An hour later, something positive did happen. When I took a Covid test. Maybe positivity just isn’t my thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 378 You deserved it 107

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Anonymous · 31 October 2023, 00:02 ·Belleville, United States

Bad guy

Today, I realized I’m not my boyfriend’s “type” anymore. People say I’m beautiful but I guess he wants the filtered, social media-butterfly type. He won’t break up with me because he doesn’t want to be the bad guy, considering everything I’ve done and do for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 176

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WhoNeedsFriends · 28 August 2021, 16:01 ·Staten Island, United States

You can't handle the truth!

Today, my friends held a roast for my birthday, as per my request. They went pretty hard and I got a little uncomfortable. Afterwards, I told them that their jokes were a little too far, and they said all of their roasts were 100% genuine, and they just needed an excuse to tell me their problems with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 1 665

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Shellz · 9 November 2024, 22:00 ·Birmingham, United States

Emotional

Today, my mom sent me a text that said "You're my favorite!" and I got all emotional. Then I realized she'd accidentally sent it to our family group chat. My siblings were furious, and she tried to backtrack by calling all of us her "favorites." FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 121

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Susan01 · 11 January 2025, 12:00 ·Carson City, United States

Core strength

Today, I gave yoga a try for what seemed like the tenth time. I underestimated how it's actually harder than it looks, and my gross unexpected sweat made my mat uber-slippery, and I ended up sliding into the person next to me. We both toppled over like human dominoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 160

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Anonymous · 28 April 2025, 20:00 ·Seattle, United States

Probably a Monday

Today, running late for work, I ran outside and the door handle literally broke off my vehicle when I pulled to open it. I climbed in through the passenger door, turned on my car, and the windshield wipers were on… swiping a fresh $78 parking ticket across my windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 139

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Anonymous · 22 December 2025, 12:00

Not my fault!

Today, I tried to be helpful by holding the door open for a woman carrying boxes. She smiled and hurried toward me, then tripped and dropped everything at my feet. She stared at me like I'd caused it, and said, “Thanks” through clenched teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 85

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??? · 3 May 2025, 03:00 ·Denver, United States

Freak out

Today, I woke up from a nap to a weird buzzing sound in my ear. Panicked, I swatted at my ear to get rid of what I thought was a fly. Instead, I hit my phone, which was on vibrate, and it fell on the tiled floor, spinning the screen into a cracked, shattered mess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 320

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Anonymous · 13 July 2025, 09:00 ·Western Springs, United States

The road to hell

Today, I realized that basically half of my route to work now is road construction with traffic narrowed to one lane in both directions and backups for miles. I really wish they wouldn't start so many projects at once. Even trying to get around it is a pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 72

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Renee · 25 January 2026, 22:00

OK then…

Today, I’m hard of hearing and rely partly on lip-reading. At a grocery store, the cashier asked me something I didn’t quite catch, so I smiled and nodded. Apparently, she had asked if I wanted to donate to a charity, so I ended up donating a couple of bucks to a cause I still don’t know the name of. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 201

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Anonymous · 30 July 2026, 20:00 ·United States 🌶️ Spicy

You swap what?

Today, my boyfriend let me in on a little family secret. His brothers often swap girlfriends and wives. They insist it’s not weird because the siblings themselves aren’t doing anything together, just the in-laws. It’s still too close for comfort and too weird to ignore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 80

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Anonymous · 11 April 2025, 03:00

Well played, Deborah

Today, my bitch ex has successfully trained our daughter to refer to her second husband as “Dad” and me as Mister, or Sir, or even by my first name a few times. This has to be abuse of some kind, mental anguish, cruel and unusual bullshit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 96

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Anonymous · 14 September 2025, 22:00

Toxic positivity

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to get married after only six months because of an accidental but happy pregnancy. We’ve spent thousands on the wedding and baby stuff. Apparently it was money wasted, because I just got my period, despite not having one for three months and a positive pregnancy test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 203

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Anonymous · 30 July 2026, 22:00 ·San Diego, United States

Father figure

Today, I met a truck driver at my job and he gave me some fatherly advice. The whole time I was listening, I was also thinking like, why didn't my dad stay and want to be in my life? FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 62

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No date for me · 29 March 2025, 00:00 ·United States

Weird encounter

Today, I went on a blind date. When I arrived, the guy looked nothing like his profile picture. We started chatting, and things were going fine until he asked, “So, what do you think about my date?” I replied, “Uh, I think it’s going well!” He responded, “I was talking about the waitress. I’m married.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 132

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Anonymous · 26 April 2025, 22:00 ·Benson, United States

Crunchy

Today, I was running late for work, so I grabbed a cheap sandwich from a gas station. As I rushed to take a bite, I bit into something unexpectedly hard. I thought it was a tough bit of bacon, or some sort of nut, but realized it was a small plastic fork that had been helpfully hidden inside my sandwich. I'd already swallowed half of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 144

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AllWrong · 27 September 2025, 03:00

Bad day, huh?

Today, I screwed up in my job, my husband lost his luggage in an airport, then my daughter broke the toilet flush, and my friend's kid poured porridge onto the carpet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 80

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Anonymous · 30 January 2025, 09:00 ·Lerwick, United Kingdom

Hogs!

Today, I was awoken at 3am by hotel management to tell me they received complaints about me from every room within 30 yards of mine, including from the floors above and below me. What was my crime? Snoring loud enough to rattle windows on the other side of the building. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 312

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Lance from the Serfs is a snacc · 3 May 2021, 00:30

Unhealthy relationship

Today, I had to admit that I'm polyamorous. Well, I'm in several relationships. Parasocial relationships. With YouTubers and Twitch streamers. I talk to them through the screen. I can't remember what it's like to have real-life friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 1 131

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Anonymous · 17 September 2022, 14:30 ·Destrnik, Slovenia

Red tape

Today, I found out I can't enroll in a course I need for my degree. I don't have the right prerequisites. They weren't posted anywhere. The applications for similar courses I could've taken instead have closed last week. I lost a year and a fuckton of money because I waited for the last minute, and now I can't get in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 1 584

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Anonymous · 4 February 2024, 20:00 ·United States

Night time ferals

Today, I found out that the middle of the night is the time my Mom's crazy cats like to climb all over everything. They're adult cats but are still like kittens, so I get scared out of my wits whenever they knock something over in the middle of the night, because my mom didn't kitten-proof things for adult cats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 165

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Anonymous · 29 September 2026, 09:00 ·United Kingdom

Double trouble

Today, as I bent over to pick up my baby, a wasp flew into my bra. I jumped up in a panic, flattening the wasp between my boob and my bra, where it stung me on the nipple, which is now swollen, a funny colour, and throbbing. Did I mention the nipple was already irritated from breastfeeding? FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 63

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Anonymous · 22 April 2024, 20:00 ·United States 🌶️ Spicy

Meddling

Today, I found out my mom has been randomly searching my room. I've asked her repeatedly to stop, but she says it's her right as a parent. In retaliation I started searching their room when they were out, and found porn mags and DVDs. I confronted mom about it. Long story short, dad's in a hotel. What have I done?! FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 770

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Match my freak · 1 January 2026, 20:00 🌶️ Spicy

No fun allowed

Today, I showed my boyfriend all my kinky sex toys, hoping he'd be excited. He was actually freaked out and said that I have "way too many." Sorry I'm not a boring Christian prude who's afraid of her own pussy, I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 184

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Come to think of it.... it does! · 9 March 2026, 12:00

He hath returned

Today, my mom gave me the litany of a lifetime for raising a devil child. Why so? She and my daughter who is 7 years-old attended mass, and after the priest told the parable of The Prodigal Son, she raised her hand. The priest approached, asked and put the mic on her, and she said, "Sorry Father, but that story sucks! Its all about favoritism!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 105

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Z…… · 8 August 2023, 06:00

Some people just want to watch…

Today, my boyfriend spent half his paycheck on gourmet steaks, bacon, and all sorts of other meat. When I reminded him we were trying to go meatless to help the planet, he said, "Yeah, I'm done with that. The planet can burn." We'd only been vegan three days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 2 173

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Anonymous · 26 January 2026, 20:00 🌶️ Spicy

Rough patch

Today, my husband won’t have sex with me anymore because he can’t be bothered. That’s been his excuse for almost three weeks, but he insists there’s nothing wrong, he just doesn’t want to. For reference, we had sex almost every day before this, so this is very abnormal behavior. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 93

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Breebree · 6 July 2024, 09:00 ·United States

Cats > Humans

Today, I realized I’m always being told how “amazing” I am, yet no guy wants to choose me. I’m that girl who is always overlooked and friend-zoned. I have so much love to give yet I never get any of it in return. I guess I should adopt lots of cats and write off guys forever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 266

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Anonymous · 24 November 2020, 11:02

Great quality control

Today, I got a job! When they sent me the offer letter, I sent it back ASAP after being satisfied with the salary and benefits. My problem? I wrote that I'd accepted the wrong position (in the interview it went by different names) The irony? I'm supposed to be in QC, ie., I'm supposed to have a keen eye for errors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377 You deserved it 871

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